I think im going to kill myself. Nothing i do can make it better.?

Question

I dont want to live anymore. Im not happy with anything. I have financial problems. Im $14,000 in debt. I have a job and working the hardest i can but still i cant pay all of my bills. Im in love with my boyfriend but he lies to me. I try and trust him but i cant take the fighting anymore. its killing me. we are doing the long distance thing and i know he wouldnt cheat on me. but the last 2 months have been hard. I dont have enough money to go to school in the fall and parents cant help me. My two best friends hardly talk to me and are too busy with there own lives. I ran out of my depression medicine and my dr. is an hour & half away & i dont have enough money to go there. they wont give me more until i see him. i cry all the time and no one understands me. I think killing myself is the only option i have. i have no one.

Answer 1

Please stay with us. I have been there. I was suicidal from the age of 13. I am 26 now. Don't try this; but it took me almost dying to realize what I truly have in this life. I was in a coma for 1 month. I guess it took me that long to decide if I wanted to live. I have learned a lot since my accident. I lost all but maybe 2 of my friends. A lot of people may seem like your friends, but they aren't. There are a small few though. You need to focus on yourself. Talk to someone; anyone you can trust. Kick that guy of your interest to the curb. I feel he is a major part of your problem. You don't say someone lies to you and then say he does not cheat on you. Use your mind; think into it a little. Don't stress yourself out on what everyone else is doing. As far as the money; it will come. It is all a lot of hard work, but YOU CAN DO IT. Think into your hobbies, think about this world. What do you like to do? You NEED to get your meds till you can help yourself. I used to think so negatively about my parents, and felt they were never there. I soon realized after my accident; that they were and today still are there. When we are depressed we are blind to others feelings and are somewhat selfish. We don't try to be; but in our heads no one hurts like we do, no one understands, etc. Open up to your parents, family, someone. Trust me please; there is a whole world full of people who hurt like we do. We just don't realize we see each other. Get out in the world; open your eyes. Another thing that helped me was affirmations. Taping beautiful and pleasant words all around my house. Words based on life and words based on myself. Reading :your beautiful: everyday can change a part of you to better. Look into yourself; there is a part (although small) that you are happy about. You have to acknowledge it to feel it. If you need to talk more email me at [e-mail]

Answer 2

Let's deal with this one issue at a time:
First, the debt. Put things in perspective. While $ 14,000 is a lot of money it is not insurmountable. Visit your school and talk to a financial aid counselor about this. They have options or can direct you to services that can help or possibly eliminate some or all of your debt. Also they can possibly help you with grants and/or school programs that will keep you in school. Go to the library and research governmental grant programs. Local service organizations like the Rotary, Kiwanis, Lions, etc. have grants and scholarships available. So do many other organizations and corporations. Your financial aid office should be able to help with those.

Your boyfriend is a different issue. Only you know the story there.

If your two best friends hardly talk to you then you need to add friends. The best place I can think of is a strong Christian organization on campus or in your local community. There you will make friends that will actually help you get through this rough time in your life.

Trust me, killing yourself will not help you. It will probably send you into an eternity without Christ (and THAT is anything but pleasant for eternity)

Answer 3

Okay, well I've had those kind of days before, like nothing is going right for me, and my life basically sucks, and you just want to kill yourself.
All you have to do is, (this works for me a little bit) think about good things, and think about where you want to be in the future, and make it work for you.
About your "boyfriend" if he lies to you, dump him. I know how everything is, like your debt and stuff, but still, if he lies to you all the time, he's not helping you, he's making matters worse. Get him out of your life, and it should make you feel better.
About your friends, who don't want to be around you anymore, go get a job, it doesn't matter where, a waitress or something, and make new friends there, because if your old "friends" won't be there for you then their not good friends, with everything that you're going through right now, you need somebody new to go to that you can trust, and that will be there for you. So get a job, make friends at work, and get some money from that, so in time, you'll be able to go to school, and make a family, and actually have friends that care about your well being.

Don't kill yourself thats not the answer, everything will be fine. Trust me.

Answer 4

Don't kill yourself, that's not a very good idea. Join a club or something or other. Do something with your free time. Read a good book, go roll in some grass. Learn to knit, do anything. Just KEEP OCCUPIED. I've learned that if I'm doing nothing for long periods of time, I get depressed, but if I'm doing something constructive, I feel happy again. Killing yourself is not a good Idea. It is a "permanent solution to a temporary problem" (that's from some old movie, I don't know which one).

On a lighter note:

Why are E.T.s eyes so big?

Because he has to look at the phone bill every month.
(Badoomchi!)

Answer 5

Please don't do this...i almost cried when i read your plight and really want you to think about the consequences of your actions and the impact that it will have one your family and friends.

Suicide is a serious matter. It's horrible to think that some people feel that they have absolutely no options but your life is worth so much more than that. There are people out there who would be so willing to listen and even more willing to help you sort these unfortunate problems out.

Talk to your parents, your boyfriend and your friends and tell them exactly how you are feeling. Sometimes the closest to you are the last to know and i'm sure they will want to do all they can to help.

As for your debts, contact a debt free company and ask for help. I have a friend who is £24,000 in debt but he has taken that first step and asked for help. Don't feel that you have to cope with these situations on your own as the feelings have become obviously too overwhelming for you. Your family cares, your boyfriend cares and so do i.

Answer 6

Maybe you should try rebuilding you're relationship with your two best friends. Since they're your best friends they should be able to help you out in some way right? In those times that you do talk to them ask them for help.
Try rebuilding each thing slowly and once you get one thing done it'll relieve some of the burden that's upon you now. If your relationship with your boyfriend isn't making you happy maybe you should take a break from that.
Maybe you should take a break from school. You don't want you debt to grow even larger do you? Just work and repay back all your debt and then you can start going back to school. It'll still be there when you get back right?
Just remember to repair everything slowly and hopefully your burden will be relieved.

Answer 7

It is always darkest before the dawn.

I know that it sounds cliche, but I have found it to be true in my life.
Things look bad now but maybe you just need to start over. There are non-profit groups that help people deal with debt. And the depression meds., well I have to say, medicine is not the best way to deal with these things. So, it may be for the best that you ran out. I am in no position to give advice about your boyfriend. But, if you don't trust him, why do you love him?

If you want to chat I am on-line now, and pretty much everyday.

You did'nt give up on us did you? Let us know. Please, just give us a little sign that you're still here.

Answer 8

There is ALWAYS a way! It might not be what you want it to be, and Rome wasn't built in a day, but you CAN overcome this! It will come slowly, but you can be back financially secure, stable relationship, and peace with yourself. The first thing to do, is get out of the house right now, and go where there is LIFE! Children playing, people holding hands, .......see that there is happiness to be had! You are depressed, and as soon as you can get your meds. In the meantime, try not to think about how unhappy you are. Somebody cares, and that somebody is us, here on Answers! Talk to us!!!

Answer 9

I can understand your feeling. Those feelings are real and matter to you and to people who love you ( though we often can't feel their love for us ). Though I do not know you and anything in your life, I wish you will not choose to kill yourself because somewhere inside most people's hearts, we believe there is still hope. "Hope" and "God" are probably too difficult to think about right now, then, don't think about anything, nor kill yourself. I wish you would check yourself in hospital, tell them you want to kill yourself and need a shelter to prevent that happen. I would do that if I am desperated. I wanted to die but I am afraid I would miss out so much wonderful things in life... Don't die, there are many people like me around the world understand your situation. It is not a shameful thing to stay in hospital for a period of time. I am not American, I don't know if your health care system can pay for that or part of it. Please don't die, for there are many souls looking at your post and pray for you in their hearts.

Answer 10

please whatever you do don't kill yourselfe. i know that sems like the easiest thing to do right now but don't. talk to a pastor at church,pray.
about your debts,there are many programs that help you pay for them.
and if your friends are really your friends then they would comfort you. make new one.
as for your boyfriend,talk to him and let him know how you feel about him and how your life is.