how do i get through to my teenage son to listen to me he is my stepson?

Answer 1

I'm not trying to sound rude or anything when I say this. But as a teenager with a step mom it's hard to have the step mom in your life becuase you know that they can never replace your real mom. This takes some time getting used to. Be nice to him but not too nice or else he'll think that you're just trying to suck up to him.

Answer 2

Good Luck with that one. I have a teenage son that won't listen to me and I am his mother. If I need him to do something I have to tell his father. My oldest son is my husbands stepson and when he was a teenager he wouldn't do anything that my husband said but he would listen to me and he raised him from the time he was 3 years old. You aren't my dad is what my husband heard all the time. But now he tells my husband that he was more of a dad than his father ever was. He's 25 now.

Answer 3

1. Teenagers don't listen.

2. Stepsons need extra encouragement.

3. Teenagers don't listen.

Answer 4

This will totally depend on WHEN you came into his life!!! Was he little or was he already older than 6 yrs old? Most of the time if he was older- your fighting an up hill battle because they do not like listening to step parents- they see them as an intruder- a stranger- they dontr have to listen to u! The best bet is for the blood parent in this be the one to be the punisher! Also talk with the son. Let him know u love him and care about hiom and want only the best for him. Kids like to be treated like they matter. My son is 15 yrs old and he prefers to be talked too as a human being than treated like a kid. Try talking with him. It might surprise u! Good luck!

Answer 5

You don't. Not with that attitude anyway.
See, the way you posed your question says a lot about you. You want to get through to your stepson so he will obey you. So the reasoning isn't pure.
Believe it or not, kids can pick up on this.
The trick with teens is you have to gain their trust. I know you are probably thinking, "That crap only happens in movies." But think about it this way.
This is teenager is already on the path to adulthood. He has to birth parents to guide him. He doesn't need another parent. But what he does need is someone who will listen to his problems and not jump down his throat every time he screws something up.
Having said that, start small. Say a kind word, offer a kind gesture. If you see him struggling with something you excel in, offer help but don't push. If he maybe wants to do something fun but Dad says no, lobby in his favor. If Dad is laying down the harsh punishment, plead with Dad for the lesser.
Kids know when you are in their corner and when you are against them. Kids know that their birth parents (who ever they grew up with) will love them no matter what. It's not the case with stepparents. They are probably thinking, "They don't love me, they tolerate me." So what you are trying to do is prove them wrong.
No, you are not bribing them.
You are simply showing that you are willing to go to bat for them when you feel they deserve it.
Always be sincere. Whether a child is two or 20, they will know if what you are doing is coming from the right place.

Answer 6

First of all I have a step dad and I don't like him because he is always tryn to run stuff. So my answer to you would be let his dad handle the big stuff and you b like a mentor to him. Don't get me wrong yes he needs to respect u but don't come in with a taking ova attitude. When you give respect you get respect. He already has a mother (not to be mean) and your not her. So take your time to get to know him and let him no that your their to help him with the issues in his life rather than take ova the issues in his life. Be more of a friend to him and slowly but showily he will listen. Teens period don't like to be told what to do. and Step parents usually give off the "I Run you " vibe Thats y I don't like my step dad and thats y all the people I no that has step parents don't like them. But, try giving him a Lil respect and try the whole friend/mentor approach. GOOD LUCK

Answer 7

im only 17.. turning 18 in october.. but i've really learned a lot from experience.. first off.. you have to get the trust and respect of your son.. no matter how old he is.. being a parent.. you should gain the trust and respect of your children.. (i've really learned a lot from being the Corps Commander of our school.. i really had to gain the respect of my men to be able to make them do something).. if all else fails.. there are a lot of self-help books about your problem in your local bookstores most probably.. but gaining the trust and respect of your son is the most basic thing you have to do.. don't lose those 2 things or else it will be very hard to get them back.. =)

Answer 8

Explain to him that you're not trying to take his mother's place, you just want to be his friend and you want to work TOGETHER, instead of against each other. Talk pleasantly and don't yell. Always be polite and tell him that if he respects you, you in return, will respect him. Tell him that you will always be there for him if he should ever need someone to talk to and MAKE SURE YOU ACTUALLY LISTEN to what he has to say. This is no guarantee, but it might help.

Answer 9

hey i got a step mom 2 . teenagers expecaly dont want 2 listen to there step parents expecaly the boys. he knos that ur not his mom and he wants 2 talke advantage that the fact that ur not. hes going 2 try to get his way. thisngs like "ur not my mom...u cant tell me wut 2 do" all that is just words ... u may not want him 2 hate you but tough love is most of the time the best option. if it doesnt work have a chat 2 ur husband mabe he can have a chat with ur step son. hope i helped

Answer 10

THERE HAS TO BE A LEVEL OF RESPECT ESTABLISHED FROM THE START JUST BECAUSE FIRST AND FOREMOST YOU ARE AN ADULT.CONSIDERING THAT YOU ARE THE STEP PARENT YOU NEED TO MAKE SURE THAT YOUR SPOUSE IS INVOLVED SO THAT IT DOESN'T SEEM AS IF YOU'RE TRYING TO BE A JERK AS LONG AS YOU TWO WORK AS A TEAM THERE SHOULD NOT BE A PROBLEM.MAKE SURE YOU STAY THE PARENT AND NEVER BECOME THE FRIEND BECAUSE YOUR WORDS WOULD REALLY MEAN NOTHING TO HIM AND THAT GOES FOR BIOLOGICAL PARENTS AS WELL.