How can I find my life path and stop taking the wrong road?

Question

I'm 39 I have 2 teenage boys and my life is a mess,Ive been single for a year I have no friends or family,the only time I leave the house is to get the groceries.Ive been in and out of hundreds of jobs never finding the one Im happy with.The only reason I even get out of bed in the morning is because of my boys.I'm a friendly person who can start a conversation with anyone,I'm attractive,what am I doing wrong?Ive recently come into over 20 grand its a life changeing amount for me I always wanted my own business but feel I don't have the courage to go for it.Someone with advice please please help. thank you x

Answer 1

There is happiness on any path that you find yourself on in life. May not seem apparent at the time especially when you are chopping through some of the weeds or climbing some of the mountains but you are learning, once the lesson is learned the rewards come wave after wave after wave. Today is better than yesterday and tomorrow promises to be better than today. The hard parts of our lives teach us to be grateful for the happy times. There is no obstacle too great, or it wouldn't be in your path, there is no situation, no "mistakes", no reason what so ever not to be happy, b/c happiness is as much a part of your path as pain, drudgery or opportunities lost. Your greatest inadequacy is your path to happiness, or God, or enlightenment. You can and will be happy if you stay the course, through whatever storms life throws at you. Dust yourself off, remodel or build from the ground up and you will find your happiness b/c the universe has much love for us humans, despite the sicknesses of some of our members, just don't let them win. It will get better and in some situations can ONLY get better.

What are we all doing, what is our lesson, who are our teachers? Very simply, acceptance =s forgiveness=s unconditional love. And it is often the monsters in our past, the inadequacies we have in life, our greatest mistakes that teaches us these lessons.

How did I find this? Through the first 20 years of my life I was horribly abused, the second 20, I horribly abused myself with alcohol which took me to AA. And AA a spirtual progam, taught me how to put the bottle down and the past to rest. Out of the greatest pain I ever felt came the greatest happiness I have ever known. And a little secret, you don't have to go to AA to find it but have I said thank you AA for helping me find what was rightfully mine in the first place, a happy and productive life. If no one has told you they love you today, I do. Good luck to you.

Answer 2

So what's more scary retiring at 65 never having lived the life you want, never having had a job you enjoyed, wondering what life is about and facing death without the comfort that you at least tried? Or investing that 20k in a venture of somesort, trying, being willing to fail but also working hard to make it a success.

Why not use this time ot take a college course - it'll boost your confidenc, you'll make some new friends and it'll help you find the courage to set up your own business (espeically if you do a 'starting a small business course' or something like that). AQnd as you are single and with kids you might even be eligible or funding to help you do the course.

Answer 3

Well for a start you could stop doing silly things like posting on the internet that you just came into 20 grand and are seeking advice....

... I mean why not put a neon sign above your head saying 'please take me for a ride' ....sheesh!!!

Otherwise I sugest plenty of exercise, walks in the park, time away from your boys (during the day etc) to really figure out what you really want to do with your life. What were your dreams when you were growing up?

Don't look for the answer in men. I will allow you to date them ... but sort your life/priorities out first before you let any move in or move in with them - promise? OK ? .......Good! :-)

You only get one chance ..... 39 is a great age - it really is - but you MUST make proper decisions and not allow yourself to coast along or let men make decisions for you (especially about that money) ...otherwise you will be 49, 59 before you know it BEFORE YOU KNOW IT! and in the same position or worse again. THINK ABOUT IT!

So think about what you want to DO in your life rather than how you would like your life to BE. One is power and freedom and control of your life the other is wishful thinking, daydreaming , an invitation for people to take advantage of you.... or just a way for time to simply slip by.....

You could start by joining a club or class or something which you have always loved: dance, music, painting ..... the more unexpected the better! - this will provide a lovely little jolt to yourself and give you (and others) the chance to see youself a bit differently. How you think of yourself is how you end up being ..... take at least as much care of yourself as you do you sons. It's not being selfish.

Good luck with your life ! it's the only one you'll ever have!

x

Answer 4

Follow your heart. Isn't there anything you,ve always wanted to do?
Hobbies? Try a new one. What are you passionate about?
Only you can change your life. Use your money to go to school so you can do something you like. Most of us have to work our 40 hrs a week....might as well be something you like. When you do find something your'e passionate about, you will have an inner beauty that will shine through. That is what will most attract a person suited to you. Be brave. You are probably capable of more than you know. Don't let the big picture overwhelm you and keep you from trying new things. It will set a tremendous example for your children. You may try many things before you find what you want. Failure is not falling down, but not getting back up. Good Luck.

Answer 5

Go and get information on a 'life skills' course.

Don't spend any money until you've done the course. Except the cost of course tuition. And compare the prices and feedback on all the trainers before signing up. Get the best one!

It will open up your mind and afford you strength of purpose, and direction.

Life skills is training on understanding yourself, what you want from life and from yourself, and finding your path.

I've pasted in some links for you to follow, buy the book on the first one.

Answer 6

Take that $20,000 and put enough away to cover your taxes. Then use the rest to get out of debt. You hear me? Get out of debt. If you need a new car get a reliable used one. Stay out of debt. Then get yourself a job and stick with it. Yes, stick with it even if you don't like it. Jobs aren't there to make you happy. You are there to do a job and you get paid for it. Be faithful in your job and dependable Then when a better opportunity opens up you have a work history that looks a whole lot better than the 100's of jobs you flit in and out of.
You want escape from your circumstances. Well, correct things in your circumstance and you will be able to change your circumstances. Start by being faithful and dependable on that job. You'll have to work on that big time. If your phone bills are obscene, then get rid of the phone for a while. Stay out of debt. I'm trying to help you. Debt makes a slave of anyone that comes under its power. When you get paid, pay your self 10% and put that in savings. Let that build up. That is your emergency money so you don't have to use your credit cards and get in worse debt. Stay out of debt. You are not helpless. You are in control of your own life. It is you who succeeds, and it is you who fails. No one owes you a thing. You must take responsibility for your own life.
The only legitimate usage of a credit card is to spend only that amount that you can pay off totally each month. There are credit cards that pay you back for using them. Stay out of debt. Work faithfully on your job. Raise your boys. Prince Charming will appear when you least expect it.

Answer 7

You need to slow down, and actually write down what you enjoy doing. Do you like helping people?
Do you like being in a room filled with others?

I found my answer through Nikken.
I found a Company that cares for others as well as themselves.
They have products that work, and help millions of people.

go to
www.5pillars.com/835645700
and check it out.

Answer 8

If I had £20,000 I would go to new zealand, swim with dolphins,
take my son to disneyland florida, have a huge HD LCD tv, take my friend to jamacia for a good holiday, just good stuff you've always wanted to do.

Answer 9

I hope you can find a real friend to share your problems with.There are many like you in this condition.There are also trickers who pretend to be in this condition to dube others.If you really need a friend to talk things over,you can count on me for advices.If you are one of those trickers...

Answer 10

Do whatever your heart desires, don't be afraid because life is too short. If you want your own business-- Do it! Good luck!