I broke up with my live-in boyfriend about 5 weeks ago because he was being emotionally abusive towards me, although I'm sure he would never admit to it. I had to stop taking his calls because of it and we have had minimal contact by email since then except mostly to try to make arrangements for him to come and get the rest of his thing. I have given him opportunities to get his things but he has been dragging his feet, saying he won't worry about his things right now because it seems too difficult to figure out. I left it at that and have not had any contact with him now for almost 2 weeks. For me the relationship is over and I would never consider getting back with him or even trying to be friends unless he has the desire to change and were willing to get some sort of counseling. Today is his birthday and I guess you could say I am torn as to whether I should wish him a happy birthday or just let it go.
2006-07-16 03:50:04 · 21 answers · asked by greeneyedgrl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
i do not think that you should because doing that will give him an opportunity to enter into your life once more. however, the fact that you are saying you want to , tells me that you are not completely over this Guy and unconsciously would like to make back. so when it all boils down to it, you have to decide what you really want because it seems as if the happy birthday wish is not the real issue.
2006-07-16 03:58:51 · answer #1 · answered by ayana j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1
2016-05-07 20:51:02 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just let it go. If you call him up and wish him a happy birthday then you are basically telling him that you wish to remain friends, or even give him the false hopes that you wish to continue the relationship. What you do need to do is contact him to tell him to remove his stuff from your home or you will do with it as you wish.
In every state there is a law that states once a person moves out of a residence they have a certain amount of days to remove all belongings from the residence that they lived at, or the belongings then becomes the sole responsibility of the homeowner....in other words you get to keep his stuff and do whatever you want with it...keep it, sell it, burn it, throw it out..whatever you heart desires. Please check with local authorities or a lawyer before doing anything with said property.
Good luck
2006-07-16 03:59:47 · answer #3 · answered by Eric D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should wish him a happy birthday, just to show that you're being the better person, and to make it harder for him to victimize himself. I don't know if it's such a good idea to call him and do it verbally, but maybe an email or a card would suffice.
2006-07-16 04:12:46 · answer #4 · answered by Tim 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just let it go. It sounds like you've made your stand on the situation clear. Why give him a reason to think maybe there's a chance? Emotional abuse is so hard to overcome. It has effects that last for years. Now that you're out - stay out.
2006-07-16 03:55:44 · answer #5 · answered by RRWoman 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say don't do it. If you contact him, you open contact with him. From what it sounds like, you really should not talk to him at all. While it would be a very nice gesture on your part, you could end up opening a world of hurt if with your good intentions. Good luck.
2006-07-16 04:05:29 · answer #6 · answered by tannedknight45 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, do not contact him for anything. That would be sending him a false positive message.
But it does sound like you still have strong, unresolved feelngs for him.
If he was not good enough for you the first time, he is less the second time.
Let it go.
Sonny
2006-07-16 03:58:08 · answer #7 · answered by Sonny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have someone with a truck move his crap out of your house and take it to where he is staying. put a big ole sign on it that says "Happy Birthday". Then have nothing more to do with him.
2006-07-16 04:04:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it is over, it's over. But wishing him a happy birthday costs nothing. It's common decency.
2006-07-16 03:54:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
let it go! dont ever say happy b-day 2 a person that is ur ex unless u r still friends with him, other than that i wouldn't expessally if abused u!
2006-07-16 03:54:04 · answer #10 · answered by missshopper1313 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋