I have a friend that is only a friend and i love her lots. She has a Bf. It all started like this , we where on the phone.. she said that she loves me (i know it is only friends love). After the phone call i sms her to say that i love her to... The Bf seen my sms... He knows that we are just friend.. But lost night he told me to GO (in a way that i can not type this world in yahoo thy will not alow me) So i asked him outside... I know and he knows the one how is going to hit first is going to lose a Gf or a friend. So we just had words.So here is my question... Will it be wrong if i hit the sh!t out of him and loos a friend or how must i handle this...
2006-07-15 22:28:43 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
You seem to have answered your own question, in that you acknowledge that resorting to violence is going to cost someone either a friend or a girlfriend.
If you weigh that price against the probability that having a fight is going to lead to a satisfactory solution to the problem, it would seem to suggest that having a scrap is not the solution.
So, what is?
On the one hand, you would seem to be very angry that you cannot express your feelings for your friend without her boyfriend becoming jealous and, in turn angry himself.
On the other hand, her boyfriend is not happy at having her swap expressions of love with another man: however innocent they may be, he would seem to perceive them as a threat.
Given that, the problem would seem to be one of communication. I would suggest that your friend's boyfriend needs to know, and to understand, that your feelings for your friend are wholly platonic, and that you don't represent a threat to their relationship. That is likely to be a difficult thing for you to sell - humans are generally jealous creatures, indeed instinctively so when it comes to partners.
If you are to have a hope of resolving the tension created by the relationships between the three of you, then, as I see it, the three of you are going to have to sit down and discuss the issue calmly and maturely.
To do that, all three of you will, additionally, have to be clear and honest with yourselves as to exactly what your relationships are, and what you want them to be.
This is all philosophy and communication that is very unlikely to be successfully resolved through violence in a car park.
2006-07-15 22:42:48 · answer #1 · answered by Charles K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Anger and retaliation will get you nowhere
So her jealous bf wants you out of the way?
Are you a threat to their relationship?
It sounds like he gets the impression your love is stronger than just friendship but if it is only a platonic love then surely you're not going to allow him to win and take your friend from you.
If you fight him, you'll lose that friend and is he worth losing her for?
It takes a real man to walk away and she'll see which of you is the man and which is the little boy ;) ;)
2006-07-15 22:47:40 · answer #2 · answered by WW 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First you should try to put yourself in your friend's position and think if you would like this to happen to you. If you don't, then you shouldn't do this to him. As for the girl, I really think she's fooling around with you TWO. Don't trust her. I'm a woman,so I know this better. I've heard a few women who acted exactly the same way this girl does. Don't fight with your friend when he's the only friend you've got. Please don't do something silly now and then you regret later.
2006-07-15 22:35:23 · answer #3 · answered by CRT 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO.. Never do anything in the pressure of your temper, than you losse your friend for forever..if u love her so try to be in contact with her..relize her that you care for her..and you want her to be happy..this will make her feel that you loves her..do everything she tells you, sometimes if she says that she dont want to talk to u, than dont talk relize her everytime that you always want her happyness in every condition wheather she is with you or with someone else...this will take a littile time but after some time she is Your GF... But always look calm and happy..
2006-07-15 22:40:04 · answer #4 · answered by ...... 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont understand, do you love her as a friend or as a lover? If it's just as a friend then try to explain nicely to her bf. I think he has the right to freak and react the way he did. You and your female friend have to try to explain to him that it's all just a big misunderstanding. Don't get angry when you explain to him and try to be cool.
If you love her more than just a friend then I think you need to f*ck off like he said.
2006-07-15 22:34:39 · answer #5 · answered by I Am Jack's Wasted Life 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man, I wouldn't know what to do to be honest. I know I would feel like hitting the dude, but then again, you should see things from his point of view. Maybe you guys can just talk about things and the friend/girlfriend can clear things up. Good luck! :)
2006-07-15 22:32:15 · answer #6 · answered by outlawsister1973 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes it will be wrong if u hit him and loose a friend.a good friend is a valuable asset and if u loose her coz of ur mistake then u will regret it later..................even if u r good friends there is a limit to every relationship.u should have kept that in mind.and her bf gettin mad its very natural he loves her and wont be able to take it if somebody else is closer to her more than he is.
better keep a cool mind a nd talk wid him.
2006-07-15 22:36:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It appears to me, you will not be helping yourself, making your friend unhappy, and could get you sent off to jail if you use physical means of venting your anger! Can you put yourself in her boyfriend's shoes and imagine how you would feel ? if you can be decent to one another, DISCUSS IT! Possibly, have a discussion somewhere in public, in case there is trouble. Good Luck!
2006-07-15 23:09:08 · answer #8 · answered by my4dogs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no you wont hit him because as you have written i feel you dont wana loose a friends
so dont ever hi him
and a great sujjestion allow him to hit you if he hit you he will loose gf and he will be out of your way
but if he hit you dont hit him back
2006-07-15 23:14:04 · answer #9 · answered by ravi s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why not just have your friend/his gf explain everything. it was just a misunderstanding and nothing more.
2006-07-15 22:34:21 · answer #10 · answered by origchick 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋