I am a 20 year old female and I really just think sex is nasty. Am I the only one who feels this way?

Question

I can't help it. I just really think sex is nasty. I don't even know why. That is why I do not like guys who talk about sex and stuff. I mean aren't there any guys around my age that feel the same way I do? Like you think sex is nasty? I am not saying I would not consider it like if I got married or something because I think I would want to have kids. But other than that I just really would not even want to talk about it. Surely there must be some guys who feel this way...

Answer 1

There is nothing wrong with the way you feel. Sex is highly overrated and there is nothing wrong with staying a virgin until you are married. In fact, there are many positives to you waiting for marriage to engage in sex. Just keep being who you are and don't settle for someone who is going to force you into things you don't want to do. Your Mr. Right is out there and he will respect you and your decisions.

Answer 2

I cannot speak for any males out there, but as a woman, I never could figure out what the big deal was, anyhow. I had zero interest, in dating, boys, sex, anything to do with all of it. I knew I never wanted any kids, so figured I'd just live a totally celibate life then die a virgin. The concept didn't upset me in the least.

I finally met a man I liked a lot, then another, and married the second one--I was 27 years old. And, although the idea of sex with my husband was nice enough, it sadly never did a thing for me. A few years later we divorced, and I forgot all about sexual intimacy. I figured, no more, ever, and no problem.

Then, at 40, I fell in love with my best female friend, although nothing at all came of it. Still--I finally, at long last, found out 'why' I had never been interested! I had been trying to concentrate on the wrong sex, and it really WAS all wrong, for me! Once I accepted my true feelings, which took quite awhile, I finally 'got it'. I found myself a decent relationship, and sex was no longer 'nasty' or something to be avoided.

I never would have believed it, if I had not lived it myself. You are only 20 years old; give yourself some time, perhaps? You never know how you might feel in just a few more years.

Answer 3

Maybe it's not that you aren't doing it right, maybe it's just that you've tried it with the wrong partner. The right partner can make all the differance in the world. First of all, are basing your opinion on your first experience? If so, was it his first too? That can have alot to do with it. Two inexperienced people trying something very traumatic for the first time together? With no guidance. I hope anyway. To say that sex is nasty is just wrong. It is the most beautiful thing that two people that really love eachother can do together. I really feel sorry for you. If you continue with these feelings and don't give yourself the chance and at least try new things you are going to be missing out on one of the most intense feelings of a loving relationship. It feels great, not only in your pants but in your heart and soul to give yourself over completely to one another. Just a thought.

Answer 4

Sex is not nasty at all. Unnecessarily talking about it may make you feel uncomfortable. Sometimes we have to discuss it because there could be sex-related problems or sexual abuse that could have happened which causes people to dislike it. You may have been brought up in a household or culture that deems it talking about sex nasty or the whole process nasty. In many cases it can lead to unhealthy marriages and cause of divorce.

Answer 5

Well I'm not a guy but I do know several who say they are glad to wait for sex. See my religion tells me that sex before marriage is nasty. It causes disease, unwanted pregnancy, as well as a host of emotional problem. but after marriage, sex is a gift from God, a way of expressing an unbreakable union between a man and a woman. I don't believe that real sex is nasty, it's real, and its good. But I think that the way our society treats sex, as if it is just for fun, is wrong. and most conversations of 20 year olds about sex is nasty.

Answer 6

There is nothing wrong with the way you feel about sex.
Yes, there are guys that feel the same way you do.
I know several women who felt that sex was nasty. They got married, had children, divorced their husbands and raise their children without daddies. Please don't do this.
If all you want is a friend then make it known at the beginning of the relationship. If you want children become a teacher or a day care worker and raise someone else's kids.

Good luck.

Answer 7

Well, in the literal sense, sex is nasty...it's smelly and messy, depending on the details of the interaction.

Also, talking about sex with immature people can make you feel nasty about it, too.

I am so glad that the pastors at my church have taken the time to teach young people about why God created sex and to teach married people how to share with each other unselfishly so that sex in the marriage is as fulfilling as what God intended, so that both partners enjoy it.

In legal and holy matrimony, sex becomes more than just a physical act, it becomes the joining of two into one. In this, its proper context, sex becomes true love-making. And it is more beautiful than what you could ever imagine until you are married...you can't understand it without being legally married as two individuals who have given themselves first over to the Lord Jesus and then to each other.

Without God's true love (Agape love), then yes, sex is disgusting because it is outside of the context that God created it for.

I've listed some resources so that you can go and hear what the creator of sex (God) has to say about it.

Answer 8

Sex itself doesn't have to be nasty. I can understand why you'd feel this way though, since sex has been relegated in our society to be equated with pornography or prostitution, when in fact it is but a natural God-given gift of beauty.

This beauty can only be appreciated in your own individual time, with a caring partner.

It is unfortunate that we are taught from the earliest of ages that the body and it's natural functions, including sexuality are nasty, dirty, sinful, shameful, to be hidden and not spoken of. Society's attitudes regarding this natural God-given function has created a culture of sexual repression and negativity. I believe that there would be far fewer sex crimes if we were taught to embrace sexuality as the natural gift it is, between consenting persons of appropriate maturity.

Answer 9

Until you try it, you won't know how you feel, your opinion may change, however you as well could be frigid. I knew someone as you and that dislike once sex started turned into hate and then into teasing men only but the intercourse was only if you threatened rape or forced it with no satisfaction. Her mother drilled in her that sex was for marriage and making babies only, somehow that turned into all fear, her sexual climax was one of control and teasing, but never the physical satisfaction.

Answer 10

I think it is sad that you have this feeling about sex. I don't know what makes you feel this way. It is ok to wait till marriage - to wait till you meet with Mr. Right, but this is not what you really say, as far as I can understand. You say that you will consider it, if you meet him.

Sex can be very beautiful in a relationship, but it is essential to feel good about it and - not to mention - to feel good about yourself. What makes me think this sounds sad is that I get the feeling that the reason for your rejection of sex is exactly that; you don't feel good about yourself? But then again, how should I know.

I hope you find him one day, and that you get a nice relationship.