Me & this girl I really love was together on and off for about a year but recently she ended it with me because she's afraid her parents may get her in trouble because we can only talk to each other on the phone and on the computer because she's only 13 and I'm 16 and her parents just won't agree with us together... so we have to keep it a secret and because she's ended it she said she would be with me if she could but she can't so she can't...and now she just wants to be friends with me and I can't handle it..but my point is when we was together she didn't have a problem with her parents or anything like that.. so what's wrong now? She told me she loved me last night but.. I'm tired of just bein her friend and tonight I think I'm gonna say.. Damn I love you and your really bein unfair to the both of us and if I love you isn't enough for you then I don't know what is so you make a decision me bein your friend or nothing at all..Is this the right way to go about?what can i say?
2006-07-15 16:32:54 · 9 answers · asked by Hayden M 1 in Health ➔ Women's Health
Real love is patient -- if you truly love her, then you want what is best for her and vice versa.
At her age, what is best is abiding her parents' rules and focusing on school. Keep in touch and be a REAL friend to her. Being obsessive or controlling will only create bigger issues with her parents and eventually will drive her away, because no one likes being manipulated by someone else.
You also need to love yourself before you will be capable of giving and receiving true unconditional love. So therefore, you have to do what's best for you. At this age, you need to be focusing on school, and what your goals are two years from now. Do you want to go on to college or trade school? Then having a good education and the good grades to go with it are going to help you. Do you play sports and are hoping for a scholarship? Then you need to focus on your training, as well.
The teenage years are really about practicing for adulthood. VERY FEW people actually marry their first loves. It's about learning how to communicate with that person, and how to love and be loved without issues related to control and manipulation. Even if she is THE ONE for you, you won't be able to marry her for another 5 years, so you have to wait no matter what.
If you truly believe that you and she belong together for life, then you have PLENTY of time! So tell her that you love her and that you will wait for her and you will always be there if she needs you. Then dedicate yourself to keeping that commitment by not allowing yourself to be distracted by other girls; but to do what you need to do in order to build a stronger future for you and her, so you can provide a stable financial ground for marriage and children.
2006-07-15 16:55:38 · answer #1 · answered by HearKat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was thirteen once and in love... It wasn't true love... I don't even talk to the guy anymore... I was sixteen and in love once too... It wasn't true love either. You're both young children still and it more than likely won't develop into anything until you are both mature enough to be allowed to see one another. For now, deal with her ending it with you, if you are persistant in trying to get her back, you'll lose her for good. Be her friend, it doesn't have to be a realtionship. If you can't just be her friend then you SHOULDNT be together. Grow up and date someone your own age.
2006-07-15 16:41:23 · answer #2 · answered by Sarah 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may really be afraid of her parents. She is very young and her parents may think she is to young to have a steady relationship and putting pressure on her.
If you really care about her, Don't give her an ultimatum beacause then shes getting pressure from both sides and she'll want to avoid you.
She probably just wants to be your friend as a way of keeping you around. If she is breaking it off, it's probably her parents.
At least if you stay friends you'll have a chance when she gets a little older.
2006-07-15 16:44:56 · answer #3 · answered by Little Tree 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
one thing you really need to realise that she is young... and her parents are not going to like it at all... and basically you are not old enough either to be responsible if something happened that neither one of you need....i know this is not what you want to hear... but it is truly the way i feel and i have grown children now and i have grandchildren... i think it is good that you two just remain friends.. and if you really love her and she loves you... then true love will last... live your lives the best you can and someday when you are old enough and if you both still really love each other then you can do something about it then....
2006-07-15 16:39:21 · answer #4 · answered by sanangel 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok I had the same problem...except I was the younger one in the relationship. It was extremely difficult for me and I felt horrible lying to my parents. It ended up being a lot of emotional stress that affected school, work, even my sleep. Sometimes even if you do love the person, it's not worth compromising your own health and your relationship with your parents by lying to them.
2006-07-15 16:40:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-02 03:38:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i was 13x once i thought i was ALSO IN LOVE but then relized the puberity thing. She wants to have options and if sh reaLY LOVERS YOU LIKE SHE SAID SHE WILL HAVE HER SHARE OF GUYS AND ALWAYS END UP BEING WITH YOU
2006-07-15 16:38:45 · answer #7 · answered by abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take language arts class...then she will like you...what is "yall"
and be a gental men you speak...dont say weird pervert things around people...then the people say to the girl"domt go out him!!!his going to rape you!!!"ok?
2006-07-15 16:36:27 · answer #8 · answered by Grack 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just be a woman and sit down and talk to her and the parnets and express your feelins to the parnets. and then take it from there.
2006-07-15 17:35:46 · answer #9 · answered by Ilovehim 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋