I feel like I hate my husband.?

Question

What do I do, he lost his job and is so stubborn to get a new one cause he "doesn't want a boss" I mean he is working but starting his own business.. and so am I but he hasn't made any money yet and our funds are running out. I am taking care of our baby and running a business it is so hard. Because he doesn't even try to get a job... then he is so rude to me too.. I think cause of our financial situation things are falling apart... I want to scream any advice?

Answer 1

XXXXXXXX As the saying goes, YOU CAN DO WORST BY YOURSELF. Hubby needs a wake up call. It's time to seperate. How dare he not contribute anything to the home and have a say so about anything. Hubby needs counceling. By you or by a real professional. Stop being his slave and letting him whip you. You've got the job, you make the money, you take care of home and kid. KICK hubby to the curb, tell him to come back when he get a life. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Answer 2

He is turning into a jerk. Get counselling.

In the meantime, cut and curtail all his expenses like drinking, smoking, computer internet, all sorts of hobbies or entertainment, new clothes, shoes, food, lotteries, gas for driving etc Since you are the one bringing back the income, you hold on to the money and don't allow him to lay his hands on a dime. Be the financial controller. Give him NO say in financial matters. This will emasculate him and tear down his pride. Hopefully he will go find a job to change the situation.

Answer 3

I know what your going threw.. i just got laid off 2 weeks ago and can not collect and my husband fell down the steps a couple days ago and is on crutches and needs a orthopedic doctor..

oh did i mention since he quit his last job we have no insurance and a doctor wants 110 bucks just for him to walk in the office and the rest in payments! Ya know what he says.. well if u did not get laid off we would not have this problem.......

well if ur dumb *** would not fall down the steps and quit ur dam job with benefits we would not have this problem.. i was running stuff threw e bay for a friend of mine but i had to stop that and take care of his every need because he needs to be driven to work and picked up and if I'm not on his beck and call during the day forget it! And when his kids need something it does not matter what i am doing i run to them because i do not want them doing without anything. between him and the kids i am going nuts

Now there is little money left.. he can't work.. and i am trying to find another job. but every time i try to do something he needs me.. i feel kind of bad because he can not even walk he messed his leg up that bad.. but still we need money!

I asked him what about going to get assistance for the medical bills and it was like i was asking him to die or something. rude is miled for what he has been the last couple of weeks.

Answer 4

I know there is no way for you to afford marriage counseling at this time in your life. You need to sit down together and work out a workable plan together. The object is to work out a temporary solution. First you have to write down all the expenses and figure out of way to cut them, be severe and remind your self these cuts are only temporary. Then you need to get some cash flow into the house. Any job will do as long as it brings money in. For quick money..have a garage sale. I have found most men do not want to work for a boss, they just want to be the boss. Remind him he is not his work, he is more than that, he is everything to you. He may have to put up with lots of garbage at work (never found a person who didn't) but he will always have you and his family, and that is what really matters.

Answer 5

Me, too. Exactly the same, except I have and 8 yr old and a 3 yr old. I hate picking up his slack, and I hate that he isnt concerned about it, and I hate that if I go to work since he wont, he still wont help at home or take care of the kids!!! It is always "in two weeks, I'll start at (fill in the blank)" I could just kill him some days! Pastor hasnt offered much help, either, in the counseling dept. I am afraid that since I married him, I am stuck..... Hope you can find some help. I wish I knew what to tell you. Leaving isnt as easy as people would like you to believe.

Answer 6

Hang in there. You didn't marry him for money, so you shouldn't divorce him for it. If he lost his job, he is probably feeling insecure, (just as I'm sure the situation is making you feel insecure). Do what you can to remind him that hes still the man and you believe in him. GENTLY explain the fears that you have, because its not the money really, is it? Its that you need to hear that he cares about how this is affecting you, and that you need to know he still loves you and wants to provide for/take care of you.

Answer 7

I have a stubborn mate and when he gets like that I write a letter and leave it for him and me and the kids find something to do away from home for awhile. It works great for me because you can't argue with a letter. It's my way of letting him know how I feel without him going off. Stress makes people you love act as strangers sometimes. I wish you the best.

Answer 8

both of you need to sit down and discuss all of this like Adults...not screaming 3 year old kids....

try that for starters...and if he won't go out and get a job..ask him to watch the baby so you can..
until both business are up and running and profitable..

look over the budget together to show him how things are..but the important this is
communication and acting like adults..talking about it calmly.

good luck

Answer 9

SCREAM! and then back off and let things take their course. it's the hardest but most rewarding thing you will ever do.

my wife wanted to go to a certain beach on vacation, i told her i would go there but there was a reason no one was there. we went and twenty minutes later, after photographs and my wife almost being beaten against the rocks, we left.

she apologized and i didn't have to feel like a bad man for pooh poohing her idea.

Answer 10

Hang in there as long as u can..hes really depressed and feeling like less of a man at the moment i can about guarantee you, but he's letting his pride get in the way of his better judgement.. wanting to make money faster then he can, or wanting to walk before he can crawl... if your finances start getting to a point that your child is suffering from it or about to suffer from it.. then its time to say " Look i love you very much but someone has to protect our child from this downward spiral your in" .. doesnt mean u have to get a divorce just means that u have to do what is right for your child till he gets his act together.. if he loves u and im sure he does, he's just depressed.. he'll realize that your about to bolt and do something about it.. Your husband comes first in daily living.. but when it comes to endangering your child u have to do what u have to do to protect your child.. If your husband and child fell off a boat, and they were both drowning and u could only save one who would u save??? your child of course.. same scenerio he's letting the family drown.. so your stuck in a situation of standing by your man and takeing down your family with him.. or saving your child from him drowning in depression???? Again it doesnt mean u have to divorce , just means u have to go do what u think is right till he gets his act together.. and hopefully he'll do something before u it gets to that point if he's told he could lose you ... Tell him that the only time Pride is shameful is when it gets in the way of Protecting his family .. time to protect and take care of his family even if it means getting a crappy job like working at McDonalds till his business takes off.. Good luck..