I am 23 years old and I have NO friends. The friends I use to have, have all changed for the worse.Please help

Question

People that I use to consider friends are all partying way to much for their health. Some of them are just too busy having kids and searching for their soulmates. All I want is just someone to be able to call up and say "hey let's go for drinks" or "let's go shopping" I just need help. I'm so tired of sitting at home, the internet has become my life when I'm not at work. I've tried numerous hobbies...crafting, cooking, writing and drawing. I am a good person with a kind heart and I give way more than I get. I spend time with my boyfriend but sometimes you just need time away. I'm sure some of you understand that. I'm not a big bar person, I do shoot a lot of pool so sometimes I run into people I use to know. I just need a pal. Any suggestions?

Answer 1

I know exactly how you feel!!! After high school, that's right, everybody was out getting loaded, or popping out pups, getting married/divorced. I know, it's disappointing, isn't it? Well, i tried a few things. I made friends from the gym (but even they weren't exactly on the same page as me). You have to find something you really, really enjoy, then join a class (ie. aerobics, cooking, craft) and try to make friends there. Make rapport with pple first, after about 3-5 classes, then say something like, "We should go out for drinks after this" or whatever. Making new friends is almost like dating. You still have to go through alot of toads before finding your "princeses" or whatever. Or how about school? Are you in college. That's usually a good way to meet people who are are like you. Don't totally drop your old friends either. Who knows, sometime you may want to go out with them and party. Good luck. It will get better. I know, it's hard to meet good people and make new friends. Even for full grown adults.

Answer 2

Church is a very good place to find people to be friends with. This website has a location finder:

www.upci.org

just scroll to the bottom of the page.

You could try taking a class at a community center or local college. Some colleges offer the chance to "audit" or observe the class without actually receiving credit or a grade, but just to take the class.

Answer 3

Have some patience. The worst friends are made when you're despretly searching for someone-anyone to share your life with. The best friends are made when you would never expect it. Don't fret over finding people, be patient, be yourself, and they will come to you.

When you say you're looking for "a pal" i think you mean somthing like a best friend, someone who you get along with really well, right? Our best friends are usually very alike us. Because everyone is unique, there are few people who are so alike that they connect well, therefore finding a good pal takes very long and requires patience. just don't give up.

Answer 4

See, I'm kinda on the other end of your situation. Friends that I had are all partying too much and flunking out of college or taking classes, passing them, but not graduating. Me, I am married and I have a daughter and going to college so I don't do that. My friends now are the kind that call every day but we hardly go anywhere together or we go out sometimes. The problem is that they don't have kids so they don't have to plan. They call at 5pm and ask me to go out at 7pm, what they don't realize is that I have to get myself ready, my daughter, and then figure out someone to watch her if she can't go. Don't just turn your back on your friends cause they have kids. Be patient with them and plan ahead. Good luck.

Answer 5

Have you ever thought about going places to meet people that have the same interests as you? Have you talked to your "friends" about how you feel? Don't keep sitting around and wishing that a friend will pop up out of no where...you got to take action and make new friends if the old ones are too caught up.

Answer 6

I'm 19 and I don't have friends either, but it's okay. I rely on the internet to keep me company also. I understand how you feel. You'll just have to go out and make friends. New ones. After you go out a few times and meet some people I think you'll be fine.

Answer 7

You need a change of pace as far as your friends go. i had this happen and the difference was that I got saved and married, they kept getting new babies' daddies and doing stuff that was totally destructive. it sounds to me that God sees you different and has allowed you to see that some things are unnecessary or even harmful.. If you don't pray, you can start and start by asking for the right kinds of friends to come to your life. try some different activities and open yourself up to meet people that maybe before you would not have spoke to.

Answer 8

I'm in the same position, I'm a little older than you but I too wish that every once in awhile that I had a friend to call up. I've tried the church thing and they all act like breathing it self is a sin. Eventually you will find that special friend.

Answer 9

Take a class in something you like or want to know about. Not for the credit but to meet people with the some interests that you have.

Answer 10

Hi do you live in nyc area? if so email me direct @yahoo.com :) when you cut people off like the ones you described it's for the best. i do the same thing, "solo" but hey it beats settling hanging out with trash just to have fun. i have standards and i am not going to succumb them for ANYONE. hang in there like i am doing and the "right" individuals will come your way. until then find yourself take care of yourself until the appropriate individuals come your way. really good things are worth the wait. you wouldn't pick peaches in the winter! (smile)