should my friend be married to a guy that expects her to be something she is not?he says change or i leave?

Question

my friend is married to this guy that is unhappy with the way she acts or how she talks, he says she makes a fool of herself and him when shes around people cause she doesnt know " how to talk right" what should she do,she cannot even have a opinion,if she tries to he cusses her out. he always right but she never is.

Answer 1

The sad fact is that your friend IS married to that moron. When two people LOVE each other, neither expects the other to change. Why? Because each is the exact person the other fell in love with, so why would they want you to change? Your friends husband obviously knew her weaknesses and right now he is preying on them and as long as she continues to let him control her attitude, personality and the way she socializes around others, she'll never be her own person and she will lose her identity completely and once that happens, it's VERY VERY hard to get it back! Nobody deserves to be a doormat. Tell your friend that she is fine just the way she is and that you can never win an arguement with a moron who thinks he is always right. I would opt to help him pack his bags!!!! and in a QUICK HURRY! She will survive. We all do!

Answer 2

While the guy sounds, well, jerkish I should caution you a bit. Just because you see him this way doesn't mean she sees him this way or that she'll ever see him this way. It is her life and her marriage. Generally meddling in it, even--perhaps especially--if it's in "her own good" is in most cases a very bad idea.

That's not to say you cannot have an opinion on the husband, or should remain silent about it. It does however mean that you cannot make the decision of whether or not they're together. If she wants to talk about it, sure. If you have a genuine concern for her happiness, then talk to her about it. In the end though, she's gonna do what she feels is the right thing to do even if it runs contrary to your opinion on the matter.

Answer 3

It is something your friend needs to confront. Unfortunately it is obvious she will tolerate the abuse, the controlling nature of her husband. It isnt' right, but we cannot make those choices for our friends, just be there and be supportive. If he is so unhappy with her then why did he marry her? I say she needs to get the guts up to leave him and get a life of her own, gain back her self respect.

Answer 4

Your friend should tell her husband "Don't let the door bang you on the A$$ on your way out." She is married to a real jerk that probably doesn't love her. In marriage people adjust to each other. Obvious;y this idiot is a control freak and demands that all things go his way. He belongs living with his Mommy.

Answer 5

Change or i leave?
I say let his *** walk out the door, a man like that is not worth a second of a womans time.

Answer 6

He sounds controlling which is going to end up with her resenting him (if she doesn't already). He sounds insecure and immature. It's him with the problem, not her, however, she needs to stick up for herself and be herself. If he doens't like it, she needs to find someone who appreciates her for her!

Answer 7

no, i wouldnt be married to someone like that,i would not expect someone to change, the man or person should of had known who she was before the marriage.

Answer 8

tell her if she is happy with him. if she isnt tell her 2 get a divorse! 'cause who would want a mean husband that never says any thing nice to u? not me!!

Answer 9

tell her dont do it if she thinks its bad just wait till she gets married everything is going 2 x

Answer 10

he sounds like an abusive jerk, he needs professional help. and she needs professional help to be healed emotionally