My wife is 15 yrs older than me and she has had a.....lets say a colorful past.She is a different person now and has never done me any wrong that im aware of.Should her past matter?
2006-07-15 12:52:01 · 12 answers · asked by Dale D 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Her past is what got her to the place and time that brought the two of you together. Be grateful for her past -- it drove her "life's journey" which now includes you!
Clearly, it bothers you, or you wouldn't have written this question. hopefully, what bothers you most is that her past DOESN'T bother you.
But, don't expect perfection (from her or yourself). Trust is something that must be earned by both. Unconditional love makes that process much easier.
2006-07-15 13:14:01 · answer #1 · answered by Love2Sew 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It should not matter, but the reality of the situation is like this...you are always gonna think about the things you have heard about her and from time to time it will bother you. You are only human and jealousy is a part of human nature. With that being said, still you should love her for who is she now. What a person has done in their past doesn't make them who they are now, if they have changed. If she has never wronged you then love her unconditionally and try your best to leave the past in the past. She probably has alot of regrets and wishes she had done things differently and she deserves alot of credit for changing. We are all young once and some of us have done things we are less than proud of, but we should not have to hear about it for eternity, especially from the one we love. Her past should not matter at all if she is a good wife who is loving and faithful try to let that be all that matters. Maybe she settled her wild ways while she was younger and that is why she has done no wrong to you. Sometimes what happens in our past molds us to be the people we are today and that doesn't mean the past behavior would ever be repeated, in fact, it may mean just the opposite. Just love her for who she is, not what she has done.
2006-07-15 20:30:31 · answer #2 · answered by whatshername 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think so. Don't let the past ruin a good marriage. Though, make sure to communicate about everything, and don't keep any secrets. As long as you are happy together now, that's all that matters! Good Luck!
2006-07-15 19:56:09 · answer #3 · answered by blondie_879 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is so typical on guys....If you accept your wife with her wrongs and rights....Then you need to do it! 'cause we all have a past...I have a past that is my present.see, I have a son! and my husband toOK me and my son! or "package' as some people like to call it...So, just let it go or is going to ruin your marriage.....ok?
I mean look at how good is she.....You married her for a reason, didn't you? Good Luck!
2006-07-15 20:53:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is you wife, it apparently did not matter enough not to marry her?¿? It should not at this point matter at all and you should never mention it again. She has treated you well and changed her life, you are being very disrespectful to her to even think like that! Shame on you.
2006-07-15 19:58:35 · answer #5 · answered by Badkitty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the situation were reversed I'm sure you wouldn't want her to hold your past against you. If you love each other then the past is just that, the past.
2006-07-15 19:57:55 · answer #6 · answered by theoriginalquestmaker 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she loves you and she's loyal to you, past shouldn't matter, eventhough i know her past will get stuck in your mind, but you have to accept the fact that we all make mistakes, no one is perfect man come on......Ciao
2006-07-15 19:58:26 · answer #7 · answered by Lesley 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We can't change our pasts. We all have them. Those experiences contribute to who we are today. If you love her, and she is devoted to you, then don't worry about it. Just concentrate on your future as a loving couple.
2006-07-15 20:34:41 · answer #8 · answered by Lady J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. It was her PAST. She did have a life before you. You had a life before her. Get over it!!
2006-07-15 20:20:54 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everybody has a past.
2006-07-15 19:59:50 · answer #10 · answered by oldman 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋