We've all seen them. You are in a group of any kind, perhaps even enjoying yourself and someone makes a horrible angry remark of criticism against you and you have no idea why? What is the best way to handle this, short of never seeing them again? (For example, you have to see them all the time, like on the job.)
2006-07-15 12:23:34 · 15 answers · asked by Greanwitch 3 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Ask them calmly why they are reacting that way. Stay calm the whole time. You'll either show everyone else in the group that the other person's being irrational or you'll have a better idea of what's wrong with that person.
2006-07-15 12:27:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a retired mental health counselor, and as an "old man" as my son affectionately calls me, I can tell you that people like the "angry" and "hostile" ones you ask about want only one thing: Attention from Everybody, and they will do anything and say anything to get it. And if you ignore them, they'll sometimes get even meaner and "angrier" in order to get what they came after. It's better for them to do that than to admit to losing face when they find no one is paying any attention to them at all. If you are somewhere where you expect to meet such an individual, get with any friends of yours that might be with you, and agree to a plan of ignoring or "minimizing" such individuals. DO NOT engage in verbal hostilities with them. They are "professionals" at this. They have a pathology, a dysfunction, and they will ALWAYS WIN in such encounters. Remember, they are desperate, and so if you cut them off, or ignore them, they'll often escalate their "angriness" and can scare the more timid individuals. Remember this also, they will escalate so much that they'll get themselves removed from the group by individuals in charge of the gathering, or by police officers or security officers. At some point, if such officers are present, but not coming to your aid, you can walk away from the group, maybe with a friend, and walk DIRECTLY to the officer or person in charge and voice a complaint about the angry or hostile person. That'll get some unwanted attention for them. I know they'll make you uncomfortable, but you can get them ousted and publicly humiliated and embarrassed. Stay cool. As long as you do, you're the one in power, and you are the "better person" or superior individual. God Bless you.
2006-07-15 19:43:15 · answer #2 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am in a situation like this at my job, and have come to the conclusion that reasoning with him/her whatever is not possible because in most cases they are just some stubborn @ss*ole, that thinks they are being pretty funny. I ingore whatever it is they are doing or saying and as of late have taken to listening to my mp3 player when I am working around him. My boss hasn't said any ill words of my actions, although I know lots of people can't do this for reasons of communication with coworkers and I would have to say your best bet is to ignore them completely and go about your business.
2006-07-15 19:35:08 · answer #3 · answered by tre_loc_dogg2000 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remain calm and polite. Yelling back at them will only make the situation worse. The best thing to do would be to leave the situation.
2006-07-15 19:27:30 · answer #4 · answered by songbird 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ignore them-try to make the best of it. Just be nice and friendly and don't let it bother you. The person is probably miserable themselves and misery likes company. Put your head up and grin and bear it!
2006-07-26 13:16:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore the remarks and kill them with kindness. Treat them as though you think they're slighly frail in the head, and be really nice to them.
After all, it's how you act that matters, not how they act. You have to live with you, not with them.`
2006-07-15 19:28:07 · answer #6 · answered by grinningleaf 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing for you to do is to just try your best to avoid that person and just ignore them.If they continue being that way talk to you boss about it and im sure theyll handle the problem.
2006-07-15 19:27:28 · answer #7 · answered by cbrownswifey69 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ah..a good one..when this person makes the remark ..you say to them loud so everyone can hear....." WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME ?" the person will NOT repeat it in front of everyone especially with everyone looking at and waiting for him to answer you...so.. you put the ball back in his court and he is humiliated and i don't think he will do it again...good luck !i hope i helped.......p.s....there's a book out called NASTY PEOPLE.....how to deal with them without becoming one ....it's short and to the point... SO MANY techniques for every situation...
2006-07-15 19:36:11 · answer #8 · answered by Happy Summer 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I usually ask, "you didn't really mean that, did you?" Or I ask if they're having a bad day. I just try to make them realize that they were rude without being offensive.
2006-07-15 19:27:41 · answer #9 · answered by Justsyd 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let them make an *** of themselves and sit back and watch the show
2006-07-15 19:27:33 · answer #10 · answered by Nikki 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋