Saturday night my wife told me that she had cheated on me with another guy. She told me that she was sorry and that she would never do it again or contact him again. At that point I was shocked and over-whelmed with emotions, but I had two options in my head--make the marriage work or divorce.
Monday night I stayed at a friend's house and Tuesday night she said she stayed at a friend's. Wednesday night, while she was sleeping, I checked her phone. She had been talking and text messaging this guy each day since she told me about cheating.
Then I checked her voicemail. She had two messages from this guy. One of them said that he loved their time together Tuesday night! She wasn't at her friend's. By the way, she had this guy's phone number saved in her phone under her friend Stephanie's name.
I confronted her and she came clean.
I am more destroyed now more than the first time. How do I move forward from here?
2006-07-15 11:07:37 · 25 answers · asked by John J 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
We have been married just under 2 y ears.
No kids.
Marriage was fair before she told me.
2006-07-15 11:22:27 · update #1
By the way, when we had sex, it was great.
2006-07-15 11:23:51 · update #2
JUST DO IT and don't look back!
Your wife is like the Sunday morning cow that gives a good bucket of milk and then turns around and kicks it over.
YOU must not get into the habit of taking a sh** and stepping back in it!
Life is too short!
Move the fu** on and do it with the quickness!
2006-07-15 11:18:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Possibly yes, if she did have sex, as well as they could have been dancing and she felt hot and took her clothes off, but you should be careful about talking about this in your bosses' place, or else he's gonna do something bad to you, and probably your wife will be angry with you, and your relationship will become worse. I also have a question was your boss like that too, if he was then they probably did have sex and thinks to marry people for their money, she did it to you and now she found someone with more money because she knows your sources,and then she probably flirts alot to get people's attention and than take their money. All she thinks is "oh all I have to do is cheat ha ha ha..." I'm sorry... I have a suggestion if you don't want to dump her, first quit your job, and move away with her if she won't than she has no respect for you and it's better to get divorced. It also proves that she was cheating on you and that she was probably after your money and not you and wasn't a good wife from the beginning. I'm really sorry ( a phycholgy book that I've read a million times would have this written inside if the author talked about cheating). P.S Don't show your email to her do it in privacy.
2016-03-27 06:49:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The incident of the cheating was obviously not as devastating as the repeat offense and lying. There's a huge trust issue here now; get to the root of this and find out WHY it happened in the first place. If she's just "bored" with the marriage, that's unacceptable. If she feels genuinely neglected by you, her telling you about the affair in the first place was a cry for your attention.
You didn't mention how long you've been married, or how the relationship was working before you found out about the affair. Her deceit is unfair to you, but many marriages have survived the devastating blow of an affair. Talk to her.
2006-07-15 11:15:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
she sounds like a loser. Divorce. once a cheat always a cheat plus she put your life in danger by exposing you to over 250 diseases and someone like that does not deserve to be loved. Move on, but make sure you get the better hand in money because the courts seem to favor giving the woman all the benefits even if she was a slut or whatever. That just shows a lack of respect and disregard for your intelligence her doing that to you. Why put your heart and effort into someone like that, you know?
2006-07-15 11:14:35 · answer #4 · answered by kaliedoscope_eyes86 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The important thing is that you move forward and let her know you will not, under any circumstances, stay with a cheating wife. She broke her marriages vows, lied and destroyed the trust when she decided to sleep around. Life is too short to put up with that and live in misery.
2006-07-15 11:21:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before you do anything, forgive her. Let her live with the guilt of what she has done. It's not the end of the world. It may be the end of the relationship. Decide on what you really want. It seems that she is not willing to let it go at this time so separate and get your head on straight. If you feel as though she'll never be true, leave.
BTW-Forgiving someone doesn't excuse their deeds, it just shows that you won't be bogged down in teh crap with them any longer.
2006-07-15 11:12:40 · answer #6 · answered by Wise ol' owl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has lied to you more than once?! Divorce her sorry @ss! If she really cared for you and wanted to make your marriage work then she wouldn't have been texting him and seeing him after she promised that she was done with him. Let the guy have her. In the end he will be the one finding out just how nasty she is.
2006-07-15 11:29:19 · answer #7 · answered by ladysteelersince1976 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to get in touch with a lawyer. unless your the abusive type then she is lucky to be rid of you.if not then you must not be giving her what she wants sexaully.women need to know that you want them. except the women that get turned on by the secrecy part.then separate from her but stay in contact. then when she is with this other guy long enough, you can come back into her life as the other guy and she will want to keep you a secret from him. and who know you might get to do some of her friends before she wants you back. good luck.hope this helps.
2006-07-15 11:19:45 · answer #8 · answered by spocklogical1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
divorce!!!! She's playing games with you. But once a cheater, always a cheater. My husbad did that to me too. I have never gotten over it, and it's 10 yrs now. He hasn't cheated since, but he's mean to me and yells all the time. I should have kicked his *** out then. What a fool I am!
2006-07-15 11:09:23 · answer #9 · answered by charlie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sex should not be the reason to make the marriage work. if she did it once she will do it again. shes lied to you about a pretty serious matter. go find her best friend and sleep with her and make a video out of it then mail it to your wife
2006-07-15 11:44:11 · answer #10 · answered by Miller Light Guy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋