My relationship only lasted 2 yrs with this guy and it was a very stormy relationship-although I was mad about him.We split up 12 yrs old ago and I have been married for 10 yrs now (to a fab bloke)and have 2 lovely kids...so why I do still think about my ex b/f and wonder what might have been?Please help
2006-07-15 04:53:32 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I have 4 ex-wives and 50 ex-girlfriends, I'm now married yet again and have a baby. I have never forgotten any of those ex-loves, I think of them, wonder what they are doing, even try to contact some on the net. True love never dies, you are a good person, your man should be proud. Those who have loved and now hate or feel nothing, never really loved. Yours and mine are true loves, we loved and it never truly stopped. If I was your man I would like that, it would tell me that you are forever. A woman that can hate an ex lover, never can love. You are a romantic and so am I, be proud of your sincerity, it's a rare commodity in this age of hate.
2006-07-15 05:09:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 1⤋
Stormy implies there was a lot of emotion, good and bad. Lovers like that are hard to forget, especially if they're your first. There's also the excitement that goes along with the high emotions. It's kind of like riding a rollercoaster, you may scream through the entire ride and may not exactly be "enjoying" the ride but when it's over you get back in line to do it again. Yeah, it's fun a time or two but who wants to live on a rollercoaster? Be thankful for what you have.
2006-07-15 05:11:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would ask what is wrong with your current situation / spouse that would make you continue to long for something that didn't work out. It's ok to regret past decisions, but you made the best decision you could at the time with all the information you had available. You have to trust yourself now that you did the right thing then. If someone was able to come of it, it would have back then. Stormy dating is very bad and would have gotten worse; anger stems from feeling undervalued and underappreciated. If you felt that way it was for a good reason. Give yourself one day of mourning and be done with it.
2006-07-15 05:05:19 · answer #3 · answered by Tony T 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel. I still occasionally think about my ex too even though I am with a great guy now. The ex cared more about himself, rarely wanted to go out & do anything & was addicted to gambling....my current guy is the complete opposite & is wonderful. How long did you know the guy before you dated for the 2 years? Was he your first love & were you IN love with him? I was in love with my ex & we were only together for 4 months BUT I've known him for almost 10 years. Known him since freshman year of high school (graduated 2001) & he was a good friend back then AND had been my big high school crush. I had a bf before him but he is who I consider to be my first love because I felt soooo much more for him. I think it's natural to wonder what might have been but I'd suggest to just start living in the now & try to get over it. That's what I'm slowly doing...and it's been over a year since we broke up. What's helping me is to keep thinking of all the BAD stuff about him & the relationship & keep reminding myself that he is a completely selfish @$$hole who never deserved me or my time :-) Best of luck!
2006-07-15 05:09:34 · answer #4 · answered by §uper ®ose 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know what u mean...it's hard very hard to get over it. But do we ever...It's human tendency to think about what's it like, how would the other choice turned out. But women like the thrill and the adrenaline rush they get when they have the power of doing something different but couldn't.
Now you or someone who's settled in a meaningful relationship know what it takes to get there. But the mystery the other turbulent relationship, holds...the puzzle of why it didn't work or what would it take from me to make that work ? ....these feelings seem stronger becoz they come and go, we don't consider the constant love and energy we feel for our family, because they r right in front of you. You can touch and feel the energy, but u cant do the same for the other one.
so, sub-consciously, u think about yourself in that turbulent relationship and why did u not succeed in it ? It's not about that guy, it about you. don't get back in touch with him. Let the mystery be there...
2006-07-15 05:09:15 · answer #5 · answered by newyorker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Totally normal..everyone does this, especially when fighting or problems with present mate. We tend to idealize the former, more so as more time passes...we forget all the rotten stuff and how it made us feel at the time. Memory is a strange thing...everything gets better with time. So, fantasize away, do not feel guilty, it is one of life's little pleasures. Good luck
2006-07-15 05:18:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its being sentimental about your younger days, we think of the good days we had in a former relationship, forgetting all the stormy days. As you said he would of been bad for you, how could anything good have come out of that situation?
2006-07-15 05:05:32 · answer #7 · answered by Bazinga 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you and your ex were having sex, you probably have developed what's called a "soul tie".
God intended sex to be between husband and wife only. sex is very powerful, it creates such an emotional connection that a soul tie is created between the two people involved. this is why you feel closer to the person you have sex with because more feelings an emotions become involved. these feeling are supposed to be for your spouse only. when we have sex outside of marriage, this is why it is so hard when you break up with the other person. it (the bond created) was never intended to be broken apart.
2006-07-15 08:00:19 · answer #8 · answered by heresthedeal 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
do you still have unresolved issues about what happend if so maybe you need to contact him. otherwise once you love someone they are always in ur heart and it doesnt mean you dont love your husband>maybe you could strike up a conversation with your husband cause maybe he has some of the same feelings about some relationship he has had in the past
2006-07-15 06:07:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't think of it is undesirable in case you imagine of your ex because he became element of your existence and once you're eighty you'll nevertheless have the memories if you're fortunate and would nevertheless save in recommendations.it would in basic terms be undesirable if it interferes which include your new relationship, that would not be straightforward on your new guy.
2016-11-06 10:09:23 · answer #10 · answered by deily 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋