my 15 yr old snuck out stayed out all night what would be a fitting punishment is a repeat offender .?

Question

Last year at this time the same incident occured

Answer 1

Go sit with them at school while you are wearing your robe and have cold cream on your face. I saw a mother do that when I was a teacher and her child NEVER snuck out again. Also, be sure to give them lots of hugs and kisses - in front of EVERYONE!!! That will teach them. Good luck.

Answer 2

This is the moment that influences the rest of their life. Staying out all night is for two reasons: sex or partying. Neither good for a 15 year old.

I suggest: a long conversation where you say what you are worried about. Tell them about all the topics that teenagers need to know. If it is a girl...emphasize that sex is number one fun for boys and number one problem for the future of the girl. Sex at 15 leads to problems you know that. If they were just sitting with a friend and talking all night...then maybe they have a problem they need to deal with. Either way use the situation to make communication better between the two of you.

If they are angry or defensive...then maybe you need to add a nice punishment. Pick something that affects their ability to be with their friends. This is what matters to a teenager. Connect the punishment to the event. Be strict. Explain that it is to prevent them from messing up their life.

I look back when I was 15, and I remember my mom yelling at me...being mean....very ununderstanding. Being understanding helps more than any punishment. Teenagers need adults to understand them. If it was prom time or something like that...maybe you should negotiate in advance. That shows that they respect you. Afterall, isn't it about getting the teenager to grow up without messing up their life? Remind them you are there to prevent something they will regret later.

Answer 3

Liz, you don't say how you punished the child before when caught but here's what I'd do. Grounded for 3 weeks completely- no going anywhere and no friends over- no phone whatsoever- and no internet. You're really going to have to put your foot down and stick to your guns because this will test you too. If you give in then next time child won't worry about punishment because he/she got off from it. Kids live in the here and now- just having fun but they don't think about or realize the bad things that can happen to them when there out like that so hang in there and stick to your plan, your doing this out of love. I'm a mother of 3 teenagers and 2 preteens so I know where your coming from. Good Luck!!!!!!!!

Answer 4

you dont say when you found out they snuck out? was it way before they got home> was it after they got home and you discovered it? well one thing is call the cops on them yes it sounds a little harsh or even go out and find them if you know thier places they like and when thye are thoroghly embarrassed and pissed you can kiss them on the cheek and say " learn to sleep at night before something bad happens and your booty is in jail for more than just a misdemeanor.. always remember that if your friend commits a serious crime you are just as guilty because you were there". Here is a good idea too, Put a window BOx underneath the window makes it harder to sneak out without getting caught. As for punishing, spanking is no good locking them in their room is no good... do they have a restrictd license do youlet them drive? maybe take it away for a month with no computer and no phone no GF OR BF for a month they dont like it? well your still the parent arent you?

Answer 5

Hi LizTown:
I hear frustration all over, with
your question. I am sorry, but
I have gone through this with
all 4, my heavens!, all 4 of my
teenagers at some point.

We tried telling them if they did
it one more time, that they would
have to move out. They did.

We tried telling one of them to come
and sit and communicate what
was going on here and don't
do it again.

We tried yelling, and grounding
one of them. This worked for a
few years, and now they are
really stubborn at 19 and not
listening to a thing we say!

The fourth one, well, we just
went to bed and mentioned
later the next day that this isn't
cool, but to call and let us know
what is going on and where they
are.....this seemed to work.

At 15 you have laid the bed for
these folks. Your rules/your family
rules all have been either enforced,
or not. No changes can be made
in my eyes at this point in time.
They are young adults. Young, and
too old for your changes.

So, if you don't like any behaviour,
you decide what you want to
tolerate. They must live with the
decision you hand down.

Don't lose sleep over them.
It isn't worth it. Just let them know
that you love them, and be careful.

luv
and thoughts,
Ava

I

Answer 6

Wow ... I guess it will start for every parent that the children want more freedom. How to apply this freedom is something which can not be applied to every child. There is no single formula for everyone. Depending on the values of your child and the behavior of the child the appropriate punishment can be found. Some believe that if they say OK ... u want to do this then ... hey you are on your own. Some ban their child of going out. Some try to understand the reasoning of this matter ... Choose what fits your child description?

Answer 7

I'm going to assume it's a boy, because you're asking instead of being Panic'ed! Take away any games he has (X-box, game boy, nintendo) but put that time to good use. Tell him he has to perform community service for 20 hours, he can decide what it might be. But that way, he learns his lesson, he gets to contribute to mankind, you get your poiint across let him know that he could do the humane society. While that shouldn't be looked at as "punishment" per se - it's time he's not spending with friends, it's work he's not getting paid for.

Answer 8

Tell the kid GET IN THE CAR, and drive down to the police station. Introduce your child to the police and give them a school picture.Explain to the police that your child is bent on sneaking out and you have explained the consequences of this behavior. Explain that you are a law abiding citizen and that you expect the kid to obey and respect curfew laws. Then add that if they do pick up the child on curfew violation, just wait to call you in the morning......

Answer 9

hard punishment but make sure you tell them the things that can happen out late at night depending on your city next year keep an eye out for it i would nail the windows or nething shut cause that posses a fire hazard try talking to her and see why she keeps doing this and 2 words BIRTH CONTROL i had my first at 15 so dont ever think theyre to young

Answer 10

For a fitting punishment I say make them stay up all day. Take away their cell phone and any extra activities they may like.