Can anyone cheer me up?

Question

Well, can you?

Answer 1

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a
State Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to
himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!" So he turns on
his lights and pulls the driver over.

Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies -- two in
the front seat and three in the back - eyes wide and white as ghosts.

The driver, obviously confused, says to him, "Officer, I don't
understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the
problem?"

"Ma'am," the officer replies, "You weren't speeding, but you should know
that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other
drivers."

"Slower than the speed limit?" she asked. No sir, I was doing the speed
limit exactly... Twenty-Two miles an hour!" the old woman says a bit
proudly. The State Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle explains
to her that "22" was the route number, not the speed limit. A bit
embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing out
her error.

"But before I let you go, Ma'am, I have to ask... Is everyone in this
car ok? These women seem awfully shaken and they haven't muttered a
single peep this whole time." the officer asks.

"Oh, they'll be alright in a minute officer. We just got off Route 119."




A blonde walks into an electronics store and says, "I'd like to buy that
tv please." The salesperson replies, "I'm sorry. We don't sell to
blondes here."

The blonde goes home and dyes her hair brown, and a few days later
returns to the store, again asking to buy the tv. "I told you, we don't
sell to blondes, miss. Please go home!" the salesperson tells her.

The blonde goes home, shaves her head and puts on a baseball cap.

In a few days she asks once again to buy the tv. "We just don't sell to
blondes here! Please, give up! Go home!" the salesperson exclaims. "I
dyed my hair, you still knew I was blonde. I shaved my head and wore a
hat, you still knew I was blonde! How do you know?" she cries,
exasperated. The salesperson points to the item she wants. "Well, first
of all, that's a microwave..."

Answer 2

Now now Christopher what is the matter and who has upset you. Look out of your window and see the sun shining and be thankful you are here to enjoy this wonderful weather. Think of somewhere to go on holiday and book you will have to pay a deposit but if you leave enough time you will be able to save up.Have you had your birthday yet think of something to treat yourself with. Why don`t you go out tonight and cheer yourself up call some friends to join you and have a good night and great weekend.

Answer 3

Hey C waz happenin ma man? Ize a sittin here in da night time heat, skeaters are a bittin ma butt an Liza ma woman is a sittin aroun da house, she so big dat when she sit around da house she really do! I'ma playin ma harp an a singin da blues, ah am blue an youze all wud be too, ifin you had a woman wid a shadow heavyer dan you. Ma woman, she a huge beatch, but ize love her soul man. Now use jes cheer up an smile, dis is uncle Buster Hymen comin atcha.

Answer 4

There loads of cheers: start up with "Glory to God in optimal ..." God does no longer want cheers, we do. that's the "we" which you're cheering on. case in point, Paul makes his factor using atheltic kit. Pslams tell different cheers David sang to Saul.

Answer 5

I got stuck up on the scaffolding one time and the boss shouts up "come down the way you went up"
I says, I went up head first,
the boss says "jump and we'll catch you on this blanket"
I says, I know you, as soon as I jump, you'll pull that blanket away,
I says, put the blanket on the ground first, then I'll jump!

Answer 6

maybe if i knew why you were down yes i could cheer you up

Answer 7

YES SWEETY I CAN TRY 2 CHEAR U UP. IF U TELL LE YOUR PROBLEM THEN I WOULD B ABLE 2 CHEAR U.
U CAN TELL ME YOUR PROBLEM AT [e-mail]

Answer 8

always carry the card ace of spades,cos it counts as anything

Answer 9

yes

Answer 10

what's your problem dude??? easy there ok....
take a deep breath and relax....