My dad has this thing about black people.I happen to REALLY like one.He's perfect but i'm scared of what my father might say.I don't want my father to disown me(He told my older sister if she had a black baby/husband that he would disown her).Quiten(that's his name) is a really nice guy. I have yet to find something wrong with him.I need reasureance.Tell me am i a bad daughter for going behind his back like that?
2006-07-14 14:40:40 · 18 answers · asked by Angelina T 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
No I don't think you are a bad daughter. You can't choose you are attracted to. I don't know how old you are but if you are underage I would suggest you abide by his rules. Be quitens friend. If you are old enough make your decision based on what you really feel is right. Your father sounds a lot like mine, he disowed my brother it was the hardest thing for my brother to take. But my brother is the one living with his wife not my father. Some parents don't realize what they will miss if they disown their children. Please really take the time to think about it before you make any decisions. good luck
2006-07-14 14:45:48 · answer #1 · answered by trouble comes a knockin 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No ... you are not a bad daughter, however, if you just go behind your dad's back like some of these other people keep telling you, you will be.
You obviously love your dad and he loves you. Find a quite place and talk to him. Ask him where his mistrust or feelings come from. Tell him you would like for him to be proud of the person you want to be. Tell him that you really like a guy and tell him all the wonderful things about the guy.
Remind him that you are being open and honest with him so you hope he will be supportive of your choice. Ask him if he will meet Quiten and start from there.
Tell him you love him but that you don't want to love your life judging people on the color of their skin. I bet he will come around.
If not - it's his problem and you can do what you want with a clear conscience.
good luck
2006-07-14 15:00:23 · answer #2 · answered by BigBadBoo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you are not a bad Daughter but I consider that lying. If this guy was really that special to you it would not matter what your dad says. And you would tell him about. I have a Brother that way and he says the N...... word I hate it so bad. He tries to get his 5 yr old to say it. We have fought over it before. He does not even have custody of his son my mom does. I really don't understand where people think that it is right to hate someone cause of the color of there skin. There is good and bad in all races.
2006-07-14 14:58:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's only important that the guy you like treats you well. If your father sees that this guy supports you emotionally, is all around kind to you, than I think he will at least be open about him. He may not change his overall opinion of black people, but seeing how good your boyfriend treats you will help him to realize that they are not bad people in general. Your boyfriend may be the one person that turns your father's opinion around. Besides, there are good and bad in every race, and I feel that the majority in each race are good. I think that you can see that yourself since you're looking beyond your boyfriend's race. Good luck with everything!
2006-07-14 14:54:08 · answer #4 · answered by cassicad75 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Congrats on being open minded and looking pat stereo types! I was raised by very racist parents and fortunately knew better than to go what others though and learned to form my own opinions about all people. I have some wonderful close and caring friends that my parents still do not approve of but the way I see it, it's their loss for being so close-minded. People shouldnt be judged because of their skin color, if your dad cant see that this person makes you happy, treats you well respects you and who you want to be with then its your dad who is failing you, not you failing your dad.
2006-07-14 14:45:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to talk things out with your dad. He may not change his beliefs about marriage, but you might tell him that he's just a boyfriend, and it's very unlikely you two will get married, so there's no problem with it. You shouldn't have to limit the races of people you date just because of your dad's preferences. I know this Indian woman who was forced by her parents into marrying an Indian man, and she's very unhappy. Her brother, however, married a caucasian woman, is very happy, and his parents got over it. Good luck!
2006-07-14 14:45:37 · answer #6 · answered by Oneofthesedays 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One, if you are over 18. It is your life you have to live it. And if you do not support racism than you do not have to, even to honor a parent. You have to make the choice if trying a go with this perfect man is worth maybe your father calling your bluff. Or you can call his 1st. Tell him you have found the greatest guy(hope he really is)and that he will have to accept it if he wishes to remain in contact with you, because you are not going to get rid of him(the b/f). Some things you have to take a stand on, and this is one of them.
2006-07-14 14:46:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Parents need to learn that you are going to like who you want. It shouldn't matter what color they are. My parents are the same way as your dad. I have this really close guy friend who is black and my parents don't like it very much. But he is a really good friend. If you really like this guy don't let your dad stand in your way. After all it is your life not his.
2006-07-14 14:46:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow your heart and don't let your father rob you of a chance of happiness with some one you care about. I know girls of different races and get pressure from parents and friends for them.
Tiger Woods parents are an interracial couple !
2006-07-14 14:52:48 · answer #9 · answered by Premio 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is your dad going to date him? You shouldn't care so much about what your dad thinks ( I know it's hard), but just because he's a parent, and older, doesn't mean he's right.
2006-07-14 14:43:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋