Who originated the saying "It is better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all?"?

Answer 1

Alfred, Lord Tennyson, In Memmoriam (#27, stanza 4)

Interestingly enough, in the original the lines do not refer to romantic love at all. In Memoriam was written (over a number of years) to commemorate the untimely death of the poet's university friend and prospective brother-in-law, Arthur Henry Hallam, who died while traveling in Europe at the age of 22.

To paraphrase (and paraphrases always do damage to the original words), in context this would mean something like this: It's better to experience the love of anyone (family, friends, lover, anyone!), even if one loses them to death and suffers painful personal grief than it would be never to experience love at all. OK, that's wordy and pedantic, but it's closer to the original meaning than what we usually use these words to mean now, when we're sayiing it's better to "fall in love with" a gal or guy and have them make off with someone else than never to have been "in love" with them at all.

I think what Tennyson meant is true and important; I have my doubts about the modern interpretation. Lots of folks become infatuated with, then lose people that it would have been better if they had never met them at all, much less fallen "in love with" them.

At least, that's my view.

Go read some of the rest of Tennyson's poem. It's a long, long poem, but the sections printed in most BritLit anthologies are usually a good sample. I like the ones supposedly written to celebrate Christmas and New Year's Day for three years after Hallam's death. Anyone who has suffered the death of a friend or loved one knows how hard it is to face the first special holidays without them, especially those holidays that we remember celebrating with them.

Yes, indeed, it's better to have loved them than if we had not, but oh how hard it is to live with the fact of their death.

Answer 2

Alfred Lord Tennyson, a famous English poet from the 17th century

Answer 3

I thought it was shakespeare.