Is it just me who's a bit confused about it or are there other people out there who are too? Didn't it used to be the generally accepted norm that when you fall in love it's time to get married? Nowadays there doesn't seem to be a generally accepted norm - other than people do what they want and no-one really minds? Western society seems to be in a bit of a transitory period with matters such as these. I think people are a bit confused and there seems to be an awful lot of different people with an awful lot of different opinions and no clear majority. Discuss?
2006-07-14 07:21:14 · 9 answers · asked by anonymouse 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Life is a curious thing
2006-07-14 07:30:09 · answer #1 · answered by willows 5 · 12⤊ 3⤋
Life is what we make of it and we definitely are a product of our own society. About 30 or so years ago, with the introduction of womens lib (am not women bashing so calm down ladies) the value of family began declining. During this period family morals started downhill and are still going. Now this change in our life styles has done nothing good except destroy the good that once was. While it is true that there were no guarantees or directions when we came into this world, nor were we promised anything, there is or was any certain right or wrong way to act in any kind of situation, other then the way we were raised by mom and dad, thus the fall in love and sustain from sex til married idea, but that is basically gone, now there is always exceptions to everything. Today, couples hurry up to the altar and the head for the courthouse for a quickie divorce while the honeymoon is still warm, and then find someone else to do it all again. Theyounger generation seems to thrive on how many divorces one has instead of how long have you married. This is a bad thing. The world needs to get back to where it started from instead of forward before everything that was good, moral, and right is lost forever.
2006-07-14 07:40:50 · answer #2 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes i agree, i know that lots of ppl do co-habiat but it just doesn't seem right somehow - i mean surely if u love someone then u want to have a life long commitment to one another and aim to raise a family up in a structured, nuclear environment - i mean i no that ppl are scared that problems will arise when they get married etc - but surely they should just try to sort out their problems instead of just giving up altogether and basically scarring their kids mentally. U no what i mean, i'm sorry if i am being a bit controversial and sometimes ppl live under certain circumstances - but whether u are religious or not marriage is always a good stepping stone in relationships more so even than co-habiation. Just doesn't seem right!
2006-07-14 07:31:28 · answer #3 · answered by purpletear2003 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree Marriage is not given the status it should have, I also agree that SEX before marriage is not a good idea.
The reasons are clear that Sex before marriage is a sin.
If you think carefully when a woman says she is a virgin and then the couple have sex, there is a show of blood. That creates a binding contract sealed in blood, the guy can trust the woman as she has given something of herself that she has protected just for him. He is likely to protect her with his life.
You are free from the sexually transmitted diseases, free from unwanted pregnancies and abortions.
Going through the temptation should be part of it as working hard for something you are not likely to let go of it so easy.
How do I know, I had sex before marriage and lived in fear of losing her, this is created the very thing I feared.
I am now divorced and wish I was not that I knew then what I know now.
Basically if you are married stick it out regardless, recognising issues that have to be dealt with and working through them TOGETHER regardless who is at fault.
Learn to :
Forgive
Sacrifice
Commit regardless
Communicate Always
Search your motives
Avoid playing games with emotions
Avoid competing with one another.
2006-07-14 08:16:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suffer from confusion in regard to this subject as well. I've been in a long term relationship where we cohabitated for four years and I wanted to marry him very badly, but it never happened and we split up a little over a year ago. And I was very glad to have the opportunity to find out that we wouldn't work before we took those vows. I've started dating another man, who blows me away. He's very wonderful in every way, but I'm hesitant to move in. I understand your confusion and I wish I could shead some light on the subject, but from personal experience, its a good thing.
2006-07-14 07:34:55 · answer #5 · answered by Krissy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was married, now I am going through a divorce. I have met someone new and he is divorced. We are in love with each other and plan to move in together as soon as is possible. However , he has said to me ( and I think he wants to know what I think really) that he is not sure he would marry again after what he has been through.Despite my failed marriage , I am head over heels in love with him and if he asked me to marry him i would say yes....but I can't really tell him that in the circumstances. I think it is much more acceptable these days to cohabit and not marry. People are frightened of marriage...some people have even said to me that as far as they are concerned marriage is the kiss of death to a relationship...not sure I agree with that though.
2006-07-14 07:27:41 · answer #6 · answered by janey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel the same way. Me and my boyfriend decided to move in together instead of jumping into marriage too soon. Now it's like 'okay. now what?' i have a feeling that if we do ever get married it won't be that wonderful of an experience since we've already been living together.
2006-07-14 07:30:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NOWADAYS MORE YOUNG PPL ARE JUMPING INTO THESE RELATIONSHIPS AND THEY THINK THEIR IN *LOVE* BUT WHILE EXPERIENCING THIS THEY'RE HURTING...THEY DON'T REALIZE THAT LOVE ISN'T SUPPOSE TO HURT!!!IN MARRIAGE TRUST SEEMS TO BE A MAJOR ISSUE...MORE AND MORE AFFAIRS ARE TAKING PLACE AND MEN ARE CHEATING WIT GAY MEN!!!MOVING IN WIT YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER YOU TEND TO NOTICE BAD HABITS THAT JUST IRRITATE THE HELL OUT OF YOU!!!THEIR ARE ALOT OF SECRETS BEING KEPT AWAY FROM ONE ANOTHER AND IN A REALTIONSHIP THEIR SHOULDN'T BE SECRETS!!!REALTIONSHIP PRIORITIES ARE JUST MESSED UP NOWADAYS...MOST PPL THINK THAT THEY KNOW WHAT THEY WANT BUT WHEN THEY FINALLY GET IT THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO TREAT IT!!!JUST DON'T RUSH IT!!!
2006-07-14 07:41:25 · answer #8 · answered by KALIASH562 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i say do what feels right..go with your gut instinct. i dont see a problem with co habiting or not getting married if yall are happy just the way yall are.
2006-07-14 07:24:52 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋