A while back I wrote a short story titled "The Suitcase" those who read it claimed to love it, and encouraged me to enter somewhere. It is about a teen looking forward to a summer camp in order to avoid her family. Then she discovers her parents have been planning for a cross-country trip instead! She is furious, and to top it off her picture perfect cousin is tagging along. She brings along a beautiful suitcase and plans to record her terrible trip. In the end.... well, you'll see! Would you read it? I'll post the first page or so, I don't want to bore you!
It was the last day of 7th grade and I glanced, satisfied, at my straight ‘A’ final report card. I liked to excel. Now I was definitely going to Riverwood Summer Camp. It was one full week of hands-on advanced classes, swimming and away from my annoying family. It was heaven, especially to a 13 year old.
When I walked through our front door my younger brother Bradley was sitting on the couch eating Doritos. He was 11, annoying, and hideously covered in orange cheese. I wrinkled my nose disdainfully and Bradley threw the greasy bag at me. It landed square in the middle of my white shirt, spewing orange dust all over.
“You disgusting little beast!” I shrieked and pounced on him. Then, (of course) my mother walked in.
“Arielle Raven Palmer! What have you done?” I frantically described in vain what had happened. Mom just sighed and said, “Let me see your report cards, both of you.”
My mother’s green eyes showed her delight while reading my outstanding grades and her slight satisfaction at Bradley’s.
“You got your Social Studies grade up! Great! Oh, look 3 A’s! Reading, Math and Science! Wow, Bradley!” It must have been hard for her to have two kids with completely different goals, but the only thing I could think about was my glorious trip to Riverwood.
I sprinted up the stairs into my marigold yellow room. I lay back on my bed and began singing
“Riverwood, Riverwood, I’m going to Riverwood for AN ENTIRE WEEK!!!!” over and over until Bradley yelled,
“Shut up!” and threw something at my closed door.
Too happy to be disturbed, I pulled a beautiful suitcase out of my closet. It had been a gift from some great-aunt for my birthday a few months ago. I had planned to use it for my Riverwood trip as long as I had had it in my possession.
The suitcase was a light blue and very antique looking with silver hatches. It wasn’t very big but could hold my things because it had a gray netting to hold extra clothes. On the bottom of the inside of the case there was a red star. I had discovered that when you twisted and pushed on the star, it revealed a secret compartment!
On the top of the suitcase in dark blue paint I had written: A.R.P.
“Just like on old-fashioned suitcases.” I thought with a smile. As a naïve teenager I had entertained myself by imagining someone years from then finding my mysterious suitcase. Little did I know I would go on my own adventure with the suitcase?
Suddenly there was a knock on the door.
“Come in!” I bellowed cheerfully.
“Hey, Sweetie?” mom entered timidly entered my room.
“Hi Mom!” I said as I packed a light purple skirt and white tank top into my suitcase.
“Arielle, we need to talk.” She said gravely.
“About Bradley? It’s not my fault! He threw-“ but I was cut off.
“Not that, Arielle…” she sighed and I jumped back into the conversation.
“I can tutor him if you want…?” I knew Mom could get touchy about Bradley’s grades.
“No. It’s not about Bradley. It’s about the summer. And you thinking about going to camp.” I could feel my face fall and the giddiness drain from my body.
“What? I don’t understand.” I murmured.
“Arielle, we can’t afford to send you to Riverwood. We’ve decided to go on a cross-country trip as a family.”
2006-07-14 06:44:15 · 4 answers · asked by ~S~ is for Stephanie! 6 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Books & Authors
very good! i liked it.
2006-07-14 06:51:47 · answer #1 · answered by lemony.s freak 1 · 7⤊ 1⤋
It's good. Is there more to it, or is that it? It doesn't sound as if it is done. People are going to want to know what happens--dont' you? I write and I just let my mind go when I do it. I don't even know what's going to happen until I write it, it's a kind of rush.
Good luck!
2006-07-14 13:59:59 · answer #2 · answered by Elizabeth S 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's very good.I am looking forward to the following passages.
2006-07-14 14:00:21 · answer #3 · answered by Newlenston 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sure thing.. I'll read it. you can post it to me by e-mail.
2006-07-14 13:53:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋