my ex. bf and i were thinking about getting married and got a lisecense and went to a judge does it still count even though we did not do it in a church does it still count? i thought it was just practise and am worried i am pregnant w/ his kids and he did seem bent on as he said taking me off the market?he is grounded for three days so i cant talk to him. we are both 18 and starting college so we are somewhat mature! i am now worried he did this to have more of a say with the kids?i am catholic so it would have to be in church right?do i need to talk to a lawyer he is grounded for drinking and staying out late.i am 4 months pregnant ith twins boy and girl my grandparents will be taking care of them for most part till i finish school. what are his rights to the kids i dont trust him and he keeps trying to have sex w/ me.
2006-07-14 05:50:00 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
he wants the twins to have his name?does he have more rights if we are married?
2006-07-14 05:51:42 · update #1
i dont want him to have any rights!
2006-07-14 05:52:54 · update #2
i had ultra sound and am 4 months almost 5 now so thats how i now its twins!
2006-07-14 05:55:12 · update #3
if i dont let him sighn birth certificate will he have no rights.?
2006-07-14 06:14:36 · update #4
Yes you are really married and that gives him as much rights to the children as you have. He really needs to grow up and get out of his parents house if he is 18 and they are still grounding him!!! My sister had a boyfriend like that and they broke up over him letting his mother tell him what he could or couldn't do. You need to get a lawyer and get a divorce and have the court order him to pay child support.
2006-07-14 06:24:34 · answer #1 · answered by kyeann 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all, did the judge say man and wife and did both of you say yes when asked if you took each other as your spouce? If so, sorry honey, but it's legal and totally binding. Just the same as if you were in a church. A judge has just as much right to marry someone as a priest. Your b/f is grounded??? He's 18!! An adult. He can say no to grounding now.. HELLO!!!!
As far as his rights, he's the father, so yes he has rights. If you don't want to keep them, then he has the option of taking them. In the courts, he has as much right to them as you do and would be granted visitation. If you are married, then he has more rights then if you weren't.
If you don't want to be married, then by all means, see a lawyer and get a divorce. If you do get a divorce, then he would have to pay child support for the babies. But he would still get visitation with his children.
If you are married, and apparently you have already had sex with him to get in the condition you are in, then why would you not want to have sex with him now? There is nothing wrong with having sex when you are pregnant, unless you have been told not to by your doctor.
I would go talk to a lawyer and find out what is going on. Either of you should have a copy of the marriage license and the marriage certificate. That will show whether you are married or not. If not, then the lawyer can look it up for you.
2006-07-14 13:01:53 · answer #2 · answered by odd duck 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are saying that you actually did have a ceremony and all, then yes you are married. Now calm down and think rationally...no matter what he will have some rights to the children unless you take action now. Depending on how long it has been you can always go to a lawyer and try to get the marriage annulled and let them know that you truly did not know that you were actually going through the ceremony and they should be able to help you out. Then if you want all the rights to the children you can run an ad in a newspaper....no matter what the paper is...i think it has to be in thier state though, and petition him for all of his rights....if he does not respond to it in 30 days then you have all the rights to the children. if you ask for child support then he will have rights to the children. Just write me if you need more help. go to my profile and my email or some sort of contact is there....if we can tal one on one i can really help. Good luck girl, I feel for you. Oh and try to get as far away from him as possible, it sounds like he may have some serious issues...tell the lawyer that too, that you fear for your and the childrens lives because he has issues, that'll help. File a report and dont let him near you by law.
2006-07-14 12:58:34 · answer #3 · answered by Memigen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
His "rights" are the right to give you "support"....
YOU ARE MARRIED...there is not "ex boyfriend" now...
You got married by a Judge, not a Priest...and it still counts...
So, exercise your rights as a Married woman, and go over there and demand that you see that rascal and tell him that he is going to help care for the kids, or give some kind of support to you...and he has a right to SEX...since you are his WIFE!!
Enjoy college, as a Married woman. Remember there are day care in most colleges now, and you can get help and support, being a married couple... Take advantage of Grants and apply for all scholarships...(yea, I know that they are a pain, writing all those essays, but, its better than having a HUGE bill once your out of college)..
Oh, about the "maturity thing"... It doesnt take a lot of maturity to "make" a baby, it takes a lot to RAISE childern!!
I wish you well..
Jesse
2006-07-14 12:58:05 · answer #4 · answered by x 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You guys need a reality check!! How can you be pregnant with twins & he's grounded!!! well first of all as parents you both have equal rights to the children. As long as he signs the birth certificate! Why does he want more rights than you??? You are carrying the babies & giving them life!!! Well all i can say is that you have a long hard road ahead of you both!!! Pray about it!!! GOOD LUCK!!!
2006-07-14 13:03:50 · answer #5 · answered by Jm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, let me get this straight. You got a marriage license, you went to a judge and you got married? Is that correct? And you actually thought it was "just practice?"
Sorry, you're married legally. You are obviously in need of some help from Social Services. If you are pregnant, that chlid or chlidren need to be removed immediately for their own safety and well being.
2006-07-14 13:22:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The minute you said that your boyfriend is grounded I knew you were in way over your head. You need to sit down with your parents and figure this situation out. If you are indeed "somewhat mature" you need to do a lot better.
2006-07-14 12:56:36 · answer #7 · answered by cwoo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are married the twins would automatically get his last name. Even though you may not like it. Unfortunately that's how the court system is. He decides to fight you for custody he does have parental rights. Unfortunately immature children should not be getting married or having babies. you need to grow up. Seek counseling you both need it
2006-07-14 13:47:00 · answer #8 · answered by beenie 21 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are absolutely married, so stop trying to get out of it. You're going to have to take responsibilty for both the pregancy and the marriage for anything good to come of this. And you're certianly not "somewhat mature" if you wont take responsiblity for your actions.
He does have rights, even if you don't want him too. Sorry. He has more rights as your husband (such as custody) than as simply your "ex-boyfriend."
Stop having sex with him- that's going to make a complicated situation worse. It certianly won't make him want to support your children.
2006-07-14 13:01:48 · answer #9 · answered by brodyburks 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
somewhat mature??? ur funny! next time u get married "for practice", read the papers ur signing... they might actually say YOU'RE MARRIED FOR REAL!!!! Just becuz ur catholic doesn't mean u have to marry in church!! If u were a true catholic, u shoulda known that already!
2006-07-14 13:02:34 · answer #10 · answered by Julie G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋