why do some men find it so hard to show there feelings?

Question

ive been with my partner for 4 years we have a house and 2 children marrige is on the cards but hees so deep and doesnt show love much although he says he loves me and is very committed to me why are men like this?

Answer 1

I'm im the same situation myself. I've been with my boyfriend for eight years and 2 boys later hestill has a hard time showing his feelings. From what I understand,I talked to him about it and he says that when guys show there feelings it's sometimes make a guy feel like they're showing weakness. He also told me that if he showed his feelings that he was afraid that I would take advantage of his vulnerabilities. Which I would not ,anyway guys think that their weak if they do such thing. Guys think that they need to show the guy exterior so that their not treated like wimps especially in front of their friends. Basically it 's a guy thing and they need to get over it because this causes alot of break up down the line.

Answer 2

Okay, I'm not sure if any men have actually bothered to answer you yet, that's probably because most of us don't really know either!

It tends to depend entirely on the man's experience of sharing emotional information. For example if he's gone to see a film which is really deep, heart rending stuff and he cries, if his mates all laugh at him and treat him like dirt, he'll learn to bottle his feelings up and give up trying to show he has an emotional side. If his friends are supportive and either join in crying or try to show it touched them as well, he's more likely to be open.

Thankfully I've always had friends who I could be emotional around, male and female, and I've never been ashamed of showing my true feelings. I've been married for seven years now, and there's nothing my wife doesn't know about how I feel. I tell her I love her several times a day and try to do things to show that love in a practical way as well.

The important thing is not to force the issue, if you try to pressure someone into telling you how they feel, thier instinct (if they've had a bad experience in the past) is to push it further down inside, and bottle it up more.

Gie your partner time, freedom and support and he'll start to share. Maybe ask him for a top ten of films he likes, cds he likes, try to discover the things which make him really tick (you might already know some of them but he might surprise you). The better you know him, the more he'll trust you and the more chance there is of both of you having a meaningful exchange of emotions without arguing or silence.

I really hope this helps.

For the record, not all men are the same ;~)

H.

Answer 3

I was like that also, except I was two years and 1 child and marriage was in the air. We were engaged and set dates but every time we came close to it he would find a way to pull himself away from me...then he started to become very irresponsible. So I left and that was a mistake b/c i still love him. I would say hang in there if you truly love him and I know it would be hard to leave him considering you have the kids, but follow your heart and your head. Listen to both and only time will tell what is meant to be.

Answer 4

First, not all men find it hard to show their feelings. Upbringing plays a major role in whether some one is emotionally open or closed! Personality type and socialisation are major factors too. Patience and understanding can really help some people open up with their emotions!
Smiles, and eat more peanut butter that will loosen up your emotions.
MPBB

Answer 5

Hear it from a guy, men have pride i do have my pride and ego to protect girl but that dosen't mean i do not love my girl i do very much and i believe that most guys do, we just reveal it it other ways that you will not expect look around for other signs that you will say this was done out of pure love alone and when you see it go on and let him know, we love it trust me and it bring even better things that will definately sweep you off your feet things that many ladies will only dream of because they look in he wrong places .

Answer 6

I can only speak for myself, I love showing my emotions and I don't see why I shouldn't. My partner is in no doubt how deeply I love her. Ironically though both my current g/f (of 2 years) and my previous g/f (3 years) initially found it hard to deal with me being happy to express my feelings. They weren't used to it. But I love romance, I love being in love. We aren't all the same!!!

Answer 7

ive gotta ta say its pride way guys and they dnt liketa look soft but deep doon they really are and we noo the soft stops ta hit ;) he will love u and he does tell u nothin ta worri about there takecare x

Answer 8

Many adult males, as i became, presented up contained in the forties and 50s under no circumstances realized by technique of celebration of our fathers to assert "i love you" to our different halves. Our fathers under no circumstances heard it from their fathers, and on decrease back. It became a era of stoicism and adult males purely did not tutor emotion. it truly is a shame that generations of different halves have had to struggle through by using out-moded ecu practice. the only ingredient that got here of it that became good is this stoic way of being helped our mum and dad get by potential of very puzzling circumstances, purely because it did their forefathers. They went by potential of the whole melancholy, their forefathers by potential of plagues and famines and different hardships. If shall we unlearn the inbred procedures of our fathers, i understand, we as adult males may be better off. it ought to then no longer be a demonstration of his lack of love, yet quite your husband's way of wondering or performing from celebration. in case you should carry it to his interest and tutor what you desire and why, probably he will see what it potential to you and could be better comfortable. in spite of the indisputable fact that, in case you experience so on my own, it type of feels there is better at play than his slighting you with those words. considering i have been attentive to this reality about the pick to assert i love you, I actual have tried to assert it better effortlessly, astounding my spouse now and again even as she's making supper, or maybe as we are watching television. i ought to admit, i have gotten faraway from this little gesture of love of late and may ought to renew it myself.

Answer 9

because they think they will come across as 'soft' if they show feelings like this, as long as you know he loves you then that is all that matters, let him keep his male ego.

Answer 10

If you get the answer let me know it's one of the mysteries of the world