his brother has a 6500.00 student loan debt on my credit i co signed for he has never paid on it his mother moves from relative to relative.and i said no more. so he left it hurts but i feel its best because we cant continue to help we will never have anything. I work two full time jobs he works a temp job please help!!!!!!!
2006-07-14 01:22:31 · 20 answers · asked by lisa 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If he cares about you he will be willing to change &
come back to you w/ out you asking him to .
Be strong & don't let them do this to you anymore .
2006-07-14 01:28:15 · answer #1 · answered by start 6-22-06 summer time Mom 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hell NO!! don't ask him back. Why would you? I would have put my foot down a long time ago. It's ok to help people i'm not saying that but when it has to do with putting things on your credit, footing the bill for someone elses careless expenses thats where you draw the line. It was not your responsibility to take care of his family. If he was any type of a real man he wouldn't have even asked you toin the first place. Then for him to leave once you started saying no. That just shows you who you really married. A loser. You deserve better than that. It seems your husband wasnt ready to be in a marriage because if he were. He would have known that there are somethings you leave out of your marriage and family money matters is one of them. Go live your life and find someone worthy of you. You deserve better if you think and believe that it will happen.
2006-07-14 10:38:11 · answer #2 · answered by Sxyblkdiva 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Hun
please don't ask him back if he puts his family before you i am sorry let him stay away
you sound a independent woman i am sure you could do better for your self
i no i don't no your husband or you but to be honest for a man to let his family take advantage of you this way is no man that loves you be-live me
you should be treated like a queen not a bank you work to hard to be treated so badly
get your self a couple of weeks of work if you can go and have a break sort your head out if you can not afford to do that try and get a couple of days off
you need some time for your self sounds to me you have only had time for every one Else
i no you no the answer to this question because i no your head is not in the clouds
you deserve much better
i wish you luck
respect
shaz
2006-07-14 08:43:50 · answer #3 · answered by sharon B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask Him back!!!!!!!????? Why in the world would you even consider asking that deadbeat back? Trust me, when he sees he has to get a real job, he'll be asking you can he come back. Or at least start trying to warm you up so you will ask him. DON'T DO IT. Cut your losses, get out of debt, sue his brother for repayment, sell everything and move as far away as possible. You don't even want to be in the same house the two of you shared because he'll think he has some right to be there and start coming and going as he pleases and always blame you for "whatever" each time he goes. File for divorce and don't look back, don't bow, don't bend, don't be understanding. You owe him and his family nothing, they owe you. Three years is nothing, in another three you'll have to think to even remember his name.
2006-07-14 08:51:04 · answer #4 · answered by Love is the principle thing 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He was mooching off of you too. You were absolutely right in how you feel. I he left that is all the better for you. Have the life you want to have and sue his brother for the student loan. I know it is hard but don't ask him back. You will get all the things you want without him, and find someone that isn't that way. Stay strong!
2006-07-14 10:30:05 · answer #5 · answered by valerjoh 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know you love him, but you did the right thing in this situation. Marriage is for 2 people....the husband and wife. There aren't 3 or 4 or whatever. It even says in the Bible (Genesis 2 I think) that man shall leave his mother and father to be with his wife. The wedding band is even a symbol of that....2 complete circles that can't be broken for someone else to get in. Give him time. Maybe he'll come to his senses.
2006-07-14 08:52:53 · answer #6 · answered by *~*~*~*~* 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what, let him be. He needs to be put his foot down. You seem to be the breadwinner at home and your money shouldn't be going to help people out all the time. Sure it's good to help out family once in a while, but to have them take advantage of you is just wrong. Let him leave, that'll give him time to think about it. I think you're better off without him... he doesn't seem to be supportive of you. A relationship cannot work without the support of the significant other. Don't beat yourself over it, you were right to say no more to helping his family that mooches off of you.
2006-07-14 08:27:12 · answer #7 · answered by bonjovifan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you've spent the past three years taking care of everyone but yourself. That's not a marriage and you've been sacrificing while others have been expecting you to continue. Good for you for putting an end to it. Now maybe you can have a life and learn to take care of YOU. Best of luck to you.
2006-07-14 08:41:48 · answer #8 · answered by lmdragonldy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you like to be used by your husband and his family, ask him back. You might have to get a 3rd job to support them all. Smarten up, girl, he is gone, let him stay gone. Look where you are in three years of marriage. Imagine what 6 years will bring. He's a bum. Let him go back to his family. He is a bigger user .
2006-07-14 08:31:43 · answer #9 · answered by Nunya B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well sounds like he prefers ur mom over u
u need to talk to him and make him choose
I mean i know it's his mom and everything but he needs to realize that he married u and well in a way u come
first b/c he needs to worry about supplying everything for u
and another thing is he a lazy guy?
b/c i mean her mom already wants to bum
offf of u what if he expects to bum off of u too
2006-07-14 09:28:01 · answer #10 · answered by JAZY 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't take him back until he understands that he has to stop and say "no" to his family. He doesn't seem to be contributing as much financially to be supporting their mooching either. If the bro in law hasn't been paying on this loan that you co-signed for, i'd take him to court, no doubt about it.
2006-07-14 08:27:59 · answer #11 · answered by Crazymomo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋