I am 17 i am male, and i always am getting depressed because all my friends have more than i do. they all had it easy and got what they needed, while i always had it hard and didnt always get what i needed such as dental care and what not. please tell me what i should tell myself to get over this
2006-07-13 21:07:21 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
There's more pride in earning what you have than having it given to you.
2006-07-13 21:11:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 0⤋
Look at it this way. When you get all that you need and some of what you want, you will have EARNED every bit of it and you will be able to not only enjoy the things that you have but be a hell of a lot more proud of the things that you have and have accomplished than those spoon fed brats that you're growing up around. Not to mention that you are only 17 and you have an entire lifetime's worth of accomplishments to look forward to. I am in the same boat. I am 41 now and grew up around a bunch of kids that were born with the proverbial silver spoon in their mouths. I on the other hand didn't have a dime in my pocket from the time I was 13 unless I earned it. I am now self supportive and I own everything that I have. I don't owe anybody anything for the things that I have accomplished. Don't get down on yourself because you don't have as much as the next guy that had it handed to him....Look at what you do have and be proud that you earned every bit of it.
2006-07-13 21:26:37 · answer #2 · answered by rsqur 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetheart.. someone will always have more... always... I use to wonder why it was so hard for me and easier for other people... and I have come to terms that someone will always have it easier or better... what you have to learn is what will YOU do with what you have to get what you need... make sense?
It isn't the material things that should fill us in life... although having things are pleasant.. what you should have is peace about yourself and stop seeking material hings that may be there one day and gone the next.. YOU however have only one life.. cherish that first and the other things will come naturally as you get older... you still have a ways to go and if you start seeking the wrongs things now you'll always be after a myth when you should be setting your dreams and goals in order...
Once a dreams is made hold on to that.. but make it realistic and dare to make it happen... don't get detracted and always look ahead.. looking back only admits you failed... keep your head up and venture into your destiny...
In other words... your friends having more should only motivate you to strive to be better not depress you and make you feel less...
2006-07-13 21:20:36 · answer #3 · answered by Zinnina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just think about when you get older, these friends will not know how to function in life without the help of others. You on the other hand will be independent and knowledgeable of how hard it could be. In the end, you will have more things that matter to you because you earned them and you will have respect for these things and not necessarily speaking of material things. Your friends will end up with nothing because they were spoiled and are not responsible for their things. You should feel lucky that you are not in the same situation as them. You will end up the better person. And check with your community. There are dentists, doctors, etc. that will do work free of charge. And they can provide you with other resources for what you might need in the future.
2006-07-15 07:06:55 · answer #4 · answered by pamela2406 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
17 is the age when most people really start to think abou tthings like that,I think.The only thing I can tell you is something you already know.Some people have it worse.I've been on both sides-having everything I need,and then struggling for everything.Now I'm kind of in the middle.I don't have medical coverage anymore,but as long as nothing really bad happens,I'll make it.I would rather have been through the hard times than to have kept getting things easily.REALLY.I'm a slightly better person for it,and I learned to appreciate what I've got.Might not have a lot of money,but I've got friends and family plenty.I hope you feel better.It's normal to think about that,but not healthy to dwell on it.
2006-07-13 21:15:36 · answer #5 · answered by kimberli 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are measuring your self worth by what you have or don't have. If you continue this trend of thinking you will eventually kill yourself (not literally, but might as well). We live in a society that constantly tells us that our worth is tied to our belongings. So, if we have friends who have more than we do, then we automatically feel that they are better than us. But this is not true. Peoples lives do no result from the things they have. I have seen both the ultra-rich and the super-poor, and I can tell you from personal experience and observation that having more, does not equal having a fulfilled life.
Make yourself into the kind of person that people want to be around by being kind, considerate and helpful to your community. As long as people continue to have those kinds of values, this world can still be a liveable place.
2006-07-13 21:15:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was raised hard in rural Yell County and worked every day to help my family. But I look back and count it a blessing that I learned to care for others and the value of a dollar and how to work hard without being bitter. You can be a great blessing to all the people around you or you can be a terrible burden if you choose to feel sorry for your self and rebel against authority (parents, teachers, police).
2006-07-13 21:18:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In a strange way, you have been blessed. Your friends will have to find out the hard way that things don't just fall into their lap. They will eventually have to grow up and earn what they want.
You have this knowledge and you know life is just not that simple.
You are the type of person who will get on well in life when you are older. Get yourself a trade, find yourself a great job and then earn what you have. Watch your friends in the future struggle to get anything because they don't know how to work for it!!
Good luck in life and the choices you make in it!
2006-07-13 21:13:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never compare apples and oranges man.
Oh, unless it's one of those crazy hybrid apple oranges. If you happen to be some kind of hybrid, go talk to a movie producer and get a job acting!
Psychology wise, there isn't anything you can tell yourself to get over it. All you can do is accept it and move on.
2006-07-13 21:14:24 · answer #9 · answered by cat_Rett_98 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You, my man, are better able to cope with life than they will ever be, You've alreaady learned some of life's hardest lessons. life isn't fair. and you don't always get what you want. You've learned to be more self sufficient, and are probably more mature than they are. Get a part time job, save some money, and get your teeth fixed. You will feel so much better about yourself when you do
2006-07-13 21:13:06 · answer #10 · answered by judy_r8 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is normal.
Do not look at what your friends have and what you do not have
Look at what you have and Ethiopians don't. A real home, Food, clean drinking water, clothing, living relatives.
Your life could be much worse than not getting the things that others do have.
2006-07-13 22:06:11 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋