its getting to the point where im on the verge or dumping him because of this. i think i know almost every intimate moment hes ever had with his ex wife and i keep asking him not to tell me things that are in the past and should be kept private and not shared with me.Is this normal for me to feel like crap because of this or an i being oversensitive?
2006-07-13 15:11:51 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i have asked him to stop talking about her many times but he seems to go deaf when i tell him how i feel :-(
2006-07-14 05:22:58 · update #1
Without sounding patronising. I personally think you need to finish this relationship now. If you feel threatened by his ex and the comments he makes he is obviously still hurt and has been making comparisons with your relationship. This is unfair on you and dislodges any confidence in a future. You will forever be feeling insecure and non trusting find a new fella and get some real lovin. You don't deserve to feel like crap go out and get someone who deserves you my number is ##### #######
2006-07-14 01:35:18 · answer #1 · answered by Mark P 2 · 6⤊ 2⤋
I have never had a guy tell me intimate moments from his ex's. They hardly ever bring the ex's up at all. He is either still obsessed with them or likes drama and is trying to make you jealous or something. Either way its a lose lose situation for you. Dont be on the verge, dump him. You deserve to have someone that talks about intimate moments with you.
2006-07-13 15:17:02 · answer #2 · answered by JustMe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No this is not normal. He may be trying to make you jealous or he still thinks he was with her. Either way dont put up with it...he should not be in a relationship if he has not got over his ex! I am with my boyfriend of 8 months and he was married for 9 yrs and he hardly ever mentions his ex . I have never had the need to 'mention' to him about it.
2006-07-13 21:21:52 · answer #3 · answered by WOW 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men don't have a problem do this because they want to know your past regardless to how long when it comes to other guys. So, everything he misses from his ex, he's trying to get over to you in hope that you may pickup on some of the scenarios. He's still in love and can't get over her or he's trying to make you crazy enough to try his wants that she fulfilled. Tell him that he sounds like he made a mistake in leaving her from all the talk.
2006-07-13 15:19:12 · answer #4 · answered by msthinkpositive 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say that the reason we talk about our ex's is out of need. You see, a guy can't talk to his guy friends about this sort of thing; they would see it as a sign of weekness. So, to help cope with the sense of loss, guilt, anger, or whatever feelings we still have because we are not able to discuss them, we go to the person we trust most in the world...you. It may be frustrating for you, but remember, it is a sign of MAJOR trust for us to open up to anyone, and if you try, you may be able to see this as a compliment.
Or he's a jerk. Take your pick. Have a nice day!
2006-07-13 15:16:16 · answer #5 · answered by davidw5748 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is being insensitive to you by telling you intimate details about his ex relationship. He is obviously not good for you if he makes you feel this way. Try to move on and find someone that deserves you.
2006-07-13 15:18:45 · answer #6 · answered by Mrs.King 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its just their way of telling my ex was perfect in such and such a way so you shud be soemthing better that that . but honestly hey u havent seen her ,never known her good or bad qualities, so how can u even tell when u can go above her.
no ur not being oversensitive.one more thing if she is so good that he compares her with his present relationship why in the world did he get out of it. shudnt that answer the question?
2006-07-13 15:56:52 · answer #7 · answered by chocolate 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not just men, women do it too. I've experienced this with an ex, who always talked about her ex's. Everybody's different, some people don't see the big deal about talking about their past. I'm definitely with you though, if they talk about ex's all the time, its just plain creepy.
2006-07-13 15:18:27 · answer #8 · answered by Babber420 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh i know what you mean. and they get really shirty if you so much as mention yours. even my own brother does this with his lovely fiancee who he loves to bits. it's just men. they don't seem to attach meaning or feelings the way women do. but it does our head in. it's their way of being completely open and trusting you. When my bf does this i really have to push down any jealousy or pictures i really don't want in my head. if you find it gets too much mention something about your ex and he'll shut up. he might get strop for half an hour, cos boy can they sulk but he'll get over it. it doesn't mean anything's wrong.
2006-07-13 19:55:18 · answer #9 · answered by minerva 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is trying to be "all that" and he needs to get over himself and hear you, and hear that it hurts your feelings when he says stuff like that, and respect you, and stop!
You are NOT being oversensitive! Talk to him again... sometimes they gotta hear it 100 times before they really understand what your saying.
2006-07-13 16:14:23 · answer #10 · answered by addicted2stamping 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋