all my life , i have been the one to help everyone .drop everything and run on a dime. now that my heath has gone down and i need the help myself, know one is there for me . i realy thought all my life that if you do for others , as they needed it , that you would be taken care of when your own time came , .i was wrong ! i still beleave that ill be rewarded in the after life , but it will be a hard road to travel getting there. my husband says all the time . i told you so . but i still think he is wrong. what do you think?
2006-07-13 13:50:56 · 25 answers · asked by chipett_45 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
XXXXXXXXX Sometimes when our loved ones are in the dumps we try to keep our distance for fear that we might be crowding them or if they were our rock most of our lives we don't know how to approach them and let them know we are here for them also. Maybe this is the reason. Talk to them. Let them know how you feel. They are probably waiting for a nudge. Good luck hun. Keep the faith. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
2006-07-13 13:56:35 · answer #1 · answered by asoldierswife 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it is a horrible thing that you gave all you could all your life, and now no one is there for you. What kind of selfish people are in your family?!?!?!? Doesn't everyone know that family is the most important thing in life. I hope people realize that you need to talk to, go visit, be there for, and love your family every time you get a chance because you never know if you will ever get another one. Life is too short! I feel very sorry for people that don't already know this, because they are not going to figure it out until it is too late! I am very sorry for your situation, I wish I could do something for you. I do believe that you will be greatly awarded in the afterlife. I will pray for you, and I will also pray for the people that have not realized what is important yet.
2006-07-13 21:00:58 · answer #2 · answered by 2hot2handle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a saying: God helps those who help themselves.
You may have helped everyone, however in doing so, you ignored the greatest individual of all. Yourself.
Saying that you are a 46 year old grandma whose health has gone down, proves that you did not care for your own health. 46 is still young, and dispairing now and hoping that help will come from elsewhere is not the way of the worthy.
I say, get back on your feet. Stop complaining about how the rest is treating you regardless of how you nice you maybe and as you help others, help yourself as well.
2006-07-13 20:58:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
My mom is just like that. People wont do for you because you are a pushover and a doormat. Many people dont think that because someone has done a lot for them, they should help that person out, they just see them as a person to use when they need it. You should always take care of yourself, if taking care of someone else makes it difficult for you to take care of yourself then you shouldnt do it. My mom recently let my cousin live in her house who is 25 and a drug addict (Meth, pills,etc) he did nothing but eat all of her food and make empty promises to get a job and to help with the costs but he never did. I am 20 years old and I never ask my mother for a single dime. You are teaching those around you that if they cant take care of themselves its okay because you will do it for them. You will help them more in the long run by pushing them to help themselves and focusing on your own needs.
2006-07-13 20:58:44 · answer #4 · answered by E 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry to say that I think he is right. No one will do thingd the way you did because you were the one who did that sort of thing. People should never expect that others are going to act like you or the way you think they should even if that is how they should act, they most often do not. Don't let it sour you just consider it a lesson learned and look to the greater reward.
2006-07-13 20:56:29 · answer #5 · answered by digimutt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well he's not helping with the "i told you so" response. it really depends on who it was you helped. If it was the people you worked with...forget it. They wont give 2 dimes towards your well being. If its family, for the most part, you will be ok. They will soon realize how much has been done for them. My grandma has done this kinda thing for our family. Holding everyones heads up all the time. Organizing everything. Now that we are all grown up, more or less, she feels we all forgot about her. We didnt and neither did your family. It is scary to us to know that she is sick (48 yrs of cigs). You're not alone. And you never will be. : )
2006-07-13 20:56:25 · answer #6 · answered by JP 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is so hard to get people to help you when you down and need help people will be around as long as you up and when you down that it they are gone.I am a living witness of that. Because people have did me the same way and i try to stop doing as much as i use to cause when i need something all the ones i help always have a excuse when it come to helping me do a little simple thing as to go to the drug store for me so you got to try take care of your self a little better than you been doing believe me.
2006-07-13 20:59:40 · answer #7 · answered by Happy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
46 is young...I could see if you were 86. You have a husband to help you which is more than I have. I am a 42yr old with the kids 6,8 and 13. No one helps me. No child support no nothing..I work for the little we have.
You can't do for others and ever exepct them to do for you. That's not how it works. Do for others and expect nothing in return, that is true charity. Do you think Mother Theresa did for others so people would do for her? Or the Pope? Or the Dalai Lhama?
2006-07-13 20:54:59 · answer #8 · answered by serenity seeker 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, this is a horrible situation, I'm sorry. You're right, people should help you. But maybe, they don't realize that you need help!? You should literally tell someone, or everyone, that you are at a point in your life where you need help. Never expect people to know what you need, they have to be told! Good luck, and God bless.
2006-07-13 20:53:53 · answer #9 · answered by Jen 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you considered professional counseling with or without your husband. It really sounds like life is overwhelming you at this point, and you need for a professional to listen and help. You may even need anti-depressants, or other forms of help. Your situation within you sounds almost like you're ready to give up. Don't. There are people that love and care for you, but may not know HOW to help you, even though they love you. Please ask for professional help.
2006-07-13 20:56:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately I know for the most part how you feel. I myself used to help everyone and when I had "fallen" No one was their for me. What I had to do was to not help everyone. Now maybe that is not a road for you but for me it worked out great. I have a very few selected friends and family that I will help that I do know that will help me out when I need it.................Hope that you will feel better soon. You will be in my thoughts..............
2006-07-13 21:01:37 · answer #11 · answered by karias68 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋