I love my wife so much, I dont want her to leave but i feel at times she wants to go and have a different life. We are both in our early 30's and have 2 kids. Please help...any advice would be great!
2006-07-13 10:51:36 · 15 answers · asked by broken_fish 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
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Women NEED romance. If they don't get romance, they don't feel loved...women never "assume" you love them, just because you support them and come home every night.
Without the ROMANCE they start to feel USED and ABUSED.
I'm being honest here...it's just the way our hearts and minds work. We do SO MUCH for others, the kids, and for you, 24/7 that when we don't get any "thank you" back in the form of ADMIRATION, RESPECT, AND ROMANCE,
then sneaks in the feeling of wanting all that SO BAD, we dream of going elsewhere.
As long as you keep giving your kitty, it's saucer of milk, it will stay close to you...
but if you forget, and stop giving it milk, it will go next door or down the block beggin for the milk it wants very much. Same thing.
You want her to stay? and not think about seeking romance elsewhere? Then by God you better start ROMANCING her again. She's near her limit, as the symptoms you describe tell...DATE her again. The cost of dating her again in time or money, is nothing compared to the cost of divorce, and to your heart.
YOU know her better than anyone else. YOU know exactly how to ROMANCE her.
DO IT
I wish you love
stw
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2006-07-13 11:00:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell her how much you love her,and reminice with her about when you first met.Force her to remember why she fell in love with you,and remind her that you are still that person.Make sure she knows how you feel about her and that you still want to grow old with her.Tell her that you are so happy to have her as your wife and the mother of your children,and that your life wouldn't be the same without her.If this doesn't work you can always try "the lifestyle"(that is if you think the problem is sex.)I personally wouldn't,but some couples say that it really helped to do away with those feelings of a hum drum marriage..
2006-07-13 11:02:30 · answer #2 · answered by girlqueen 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nicely the following is going.. i imagine that your spouse is having worry with herself. i imagine she is holding you round because she purely needs someone to guard her and the toddler. It appears like she needs out. i know this sounds poor because you want her a lot. the following is the deal. even as a lady is in love that's it she is in love with you. certain there can and could be confusion.. yet not about the very incontrovertible actuality that she loves you. i imagine she is purely desiring extra money so she will finally go away you. I hate to be so blunt because you're hurting. i'm a spouse and mom of four little ones. i know how i'd sense. Being remote from the guy i appreciate is amazingly troublesome. i'd want him to call me each of the time! i'd opt to take heed to how a lot he loves me. i'd opt to be with him. Now I genuinely were in a difficulty with a guy that i did not opt to be with. i replaced into truly making use of him and it type of feels to me that it is what your spouse is doing. fantastically a lot all of it. i appreciate your heart. It sounds actual and that i'm extremely sorry. per chance you 2 ought to search for counseling. i imagine that should be your very last wish for this marriage to workout consultation. The flirting remark genuinely tells me that she needs you to be jealous! this can be an indication that she nevertheless cares or it will be an indication that she is scared because she will tell that you attempt to not be so clingy (loving). i don't know if this is going that ought to help you yet i position self assurance in telling you the way i extremely imagine it really is.
2016-11-02 00:23:46 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She probably feels like you guys are stuck and moving no where. Married couples sometimes go through this, so it's normal (but difficult to deal with).
Bring some more romance into the relationship. SURPRISE her with candlelit dinners, take her on a weekend mini-vacation to a hotel and spa, bring her flowers, tell her you love her SO much, and bring up old memories of how you met and of when you had spontaneous, fun moments together :)
2006-07-13 11:34:05 · answer #4 · answered by xxtra chocolate 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds as though your wife has already left in her mind. By no longer telling you she loves you and avoiding you, she has created a distance between you. Unfortunately it would seem she is preparing you in her own way to leave. Try to re-establish communications between you. Ask her what is on her mind. People change & sometimes grow in different directions. No matter what happens, remember you can't force something that is not there.
2006-07-13 11:17:32 · answer #5 · answered by mdsredhen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear about your troubles. I am in the same boat, and it is not good. Unfortunatly if the love is gone there is nothing you can do. Marriages go through their ups and downs, she should try and work it out with you, but if she is like my wife she won't. Just know that the harder you try to hold onto her the more she will pull away. I hope things turn out for you.
2006-07-13 11:23:43 · answer #6 · answered by Scott B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's relay not much,any of us can tell you. There must be something she isn't telling you. Ask her if she will go see a Marriage Councilor. If she says no,I strongly recommend you file a separation order. It's a smart ideal for you to get the ball rolling. It will give you"the upper" hand in court. Go talk to an Attorney. Now day's,there seems to be a lack of thinking in a lot of marriages. Good Luck!
2006-07-13 11:09:43 · answer #7 · answered by Wishee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should join some sort of swingers club where you can swap sex partners for a change of pace. Try swapping with a couple where the husband has an especially large penis. That will definitely straiten things out.
2006-07-13 11:01:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask her whats on her mind about it. Have a heart to heart (which usually ends up arguing) to get it all out in the open. You may find that she wants to go, in which case you won't have a choice, or she may say she doesn't know what wrong, then its time for counciling. Or maybe you're paranoid or worried for nothing. It ALWAYS helps to talk things out..
2006-07-13 10:57:20 · answer #9 · answered by kiss me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did she attract you in the first place? Why did you fall in love with her? Why did you get married? The answer may be there somewhere.
Tragically people do change with time and all we can do is try to understand and adjust.
2006-07-13 11:01:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋