my girl friend told me i was the first person she ever gave oral to, but i know for a fact she has done it before to someone else... how should i handle this?! she also lied about how many sex partners she had!!! i love her to death, but this is eating me apart. i would like a solution that lets me keep going out with her.........
2006-07-13 09:31:21 · 28 answers · asked by wondering 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
if you love her and are happy with her, does it really matter how many were before you? She probably lied because she thought you would think less of her if you knew the truth. Let it go man. She's with you NOW.
2006-07-13 09:35:06 · answer #1 · answered by rahkokwee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No offense, but the ex files are off limits. Honestly unless your married I think previous partners & acts with those partners are your business. Your GF probably lied so you wouldn't think she was a slut or something. And if you seriously like her than how many previous sexual partners shouldn't bother you as long as she's healthy & safe. Besides, do you really want her knowing about some of things you've done in the past, whether its sexual or not?
2006-07-13 09:40:32 · answer #2 · answered by sourmaroon 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how do you know "for a fact" that she has given oral to someone else? how do you "know" how many people she's been with?
if you love her to death like you say you do, then do the numbers really matter? lying is wrong, yes...but maybe she wanted to bend the truth, just a little bit, so that you wouldn't spaz out on her.
your only concern should be whether or not she is faithful to you now. what's done is done so you don't need to worry about the guys before you. if you love her how you say you do, then cut her a little slack.
2006-07-13 09:41:25 · answer #3 · answered by iPROMISE[♥] 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you need to ask yourself is what really matters ... the fact that she lied to you or that she has had multiple sex partners? Once you figure that out then you need to talk to her. If its her being dishonest then she needs to know that you won't tolerate that.
If you really love her you will find a way to approach her on this. Make sure whom ever is telling you things is 100% correct before you start pointing fingers.
I really hope everything works out for you. Most of all ... always stay true to yourself!!
2006-07-13 09:48:01 · answer #4 · answered by J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well think about it this way. That is a pretty tricky subject to discuss with a current partner. She probably did not want you to feel upset knowing that she has done this. She might be really embarassed about it and regret it. Keep in mind it is in the past and we can't change the past no matter how much we regret something. It is tough but I dont think you should hold it against her too much.
2006-07-13 09:36:49 · answer #5 · answered by Miro 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you told her how much it really bothered you? Maybe you should tell her that it bothered you and why it bothers you. Also, you need to ask yourself if this is something you are willing to accept and move on from. I actually had a recent discussion with someone about this actually. Its very common that women lie about their "firsts" and I really dont think that its right that they do it. I guess its something to boost a guys confidence but then when the guy finds out its not the truth its more of a blow to them then anything else. I would tell her that she should be honest with you because if she continues to lie its only going to hurt both of you.
2006-07-13 09:36:31 · answer #6 · answered by niteangel2283 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know it hurts but u just gotta learn to let it go bkuz bottom line, u're still with her right? i understand the situation and know how u feel but if u really love her, u gotta have a talk with her about her honesty bkuz trust is the most important part if u wanna stay in a healthy relationship. i know she's afraid to tell u the truth about her past but just think of this way, thats the past and u're th future, as long as she doesnt cheat on u then i think u 2 can make it thorough just fine. but make sure she can promise to tell u the truth instead of lying bkuz if she cant be honest after the talk then i suggest u just move on!! best wishes and good luck!!
2006-07-13 09:38:42 · answer #7 · answered by Jade 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is worried about how you feel or she wouldn't have lied to you to spare your feeling if this happened before the to of you were together you should leave it in the past and let her know that her past is not important only the future if you keep bring up her past you wont have a future with her yes honesty is important in relationships but you shouldn't be trying to dig up trash if you really care about her
2006-07-13 09:39:48 · answer #8 · answered by jamnjims 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
forgive her ... I'm sure you have told a lie before and this does not seem truly detrimental to the relationship give her a chance she may have just been protecting herself at least she doesn't go around blabbing all her business all the time
just have a talk with her let her know you are hurt by her actions and see what the two of you can work out together good relationships last because of good communication
2006-07-13 09:37:18 · answer #9 · answered by Butterfly07 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing for you to do is confront her and tell her how you feel. Ask her why she lied about it but one thing don't brake up with her because of that. She was maybe embarrassed to let you know of her past sexual life so dont take it hard on her.
2006-07-13 12:39:12 · answer #10 · answered by precious_vanessa_04 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋