Who wins in a cage match, me or a cheetah?

Question

Alright, this has been a long running debate with my friends. Everyone always says cheetah at first, but I have brought some over to the dark side. Here is my reasoning: cheetahs are overrated. The are basically oversized house cats -- they are built more like a bird than a killer predator. Their bones are extremley light, their claws are not sharp or retractable (more like a dog's claws), they never overpower their pray, they just chase them down and get them by the jugular...and even then they don't get the kill 9 times out of 10.

So here's the situation, I am locked in a cage with a cheetah, no weapons, only the clothes on my back. (One point I always make is that I could throw my shirt over its head to blind it). Now I am no gladiator by any means -- I am long and lean, and not terribly fast or powerful. I can do about 28 push ups at a time and my resting heart rate is a solid 61. :)

What do you think? Please back up your answer with facts.

My vitals: I am 21, 6'2 and about a buck 55. My vertical leap is bad, probably about 28 inches. My 40 yard dash time is around 4.8. I have not timed my mile in years but I'm guessing it's about 6:30. I would say my greatest strength is my long wingspan.

Assumptions: the cheetah is a young adult male, fully healthy, hungry, angry, hates moustaches.


I think many of you are over-valuing the speed aspect here. We're in a cage, it's not like it's going to turn into a sprinting match. Eventually it is going to come down to someone pouncing and then a wrestling match will ensue from there.

Answer 1

Nice question.

I would think you would win, even if you had nothing at all (yes, not even clothes) for the following reasons:

1. Cheetahs are lightly built. Humans are slightly bigger, but better equipped for power. Just compare the body frames.

2. You are in a cage. A cheetah will only hunt and kill on a chase. It will try to run away from a confrontation unless absolutely necessary. Even then, It is built for the chase (or escape), not fighting.

3. Cheetah tire easily. Humans are built to for physical endurance.

Answer 2

The Cheetah is gonna kick some @ss!!!!!!!!!!!

Seriously....ok. A Cheetah can weigh as much as 140 pounds, which may give it a leg up on you. You didn't say your weight. There are a number of factors you didn't include.

I am being too serious here! I just wanted to say that I like your question. At least it's very original! It's not your run-of-the-mill, banal question that is often seen on 'answers'.

You didn't specify the weight, age, size, sex, etc. of the Cheetah. Don't Cheat- uh! he he he!!!!!

True, you know your facts about the Cheetah. Actually, some experts categorize the Cheetah as the smallest of all the Big Cats. And, the claws are actually 'semi-retractable'...although I am splitting hairs here (by the way, are you hairier than a Cheetah???), I think you get my drift. I would not underestimate a Cheetah. Even an ordinary house cat can bite my skin, and draw blood. I estimate that...well, let's say that a house cat weighs 20 pounds. That's a big housecat. The Cheetah is seven times bigger, still!

And yes, the Cheetah is very fast. I am not sure if the Cheetah is "only" fast in terms of running, or is also fast in terms of leaping, jumping, and movement. However, I would venture to guess that this predator is very fast in all aspects. The Cheetah would have an advantage in that arena.

You would have the advantage of greater intellect. You also have opposable thumbs. LOL.

One "fact" you pointed out, I question. Ninety percent of the time, a Cheetah doesn't kill its prey??? Do you really think it would have survived all these millions of years, provided that were true?

It should be a fair fight. I mean, I know that we're talking in hypotheticals here...and, again, I find myself taking the matter far too seriously. If it were a 140 pound, young, feral Cheetah, I would say that it would dispatch you with no problem.

Don't try this at home, nor anywhere else!!!!! LOL.

Oh yeah! Plus, the Cheetah could scratch out your eyeballs. he he he.

Answer 3

Cats, of all shapes and sizes, the born killers - the ultimate hunters of the mammal world. Every where they live, they are the alpha predators. In fact, their design is such that killing is an art for them.

Cheetahs have non-retractable claws and powerful teeth. You stand a good chance against a cheetah since you seem to be powerful too. But, you can kill a cheetah by either hard blows to the head or stragulating it. On the other hand the cheetah can maul you severly or even catch you by the neck. So, if you're not careful you may lose so much blood that it's difficult to live. Here's where it gets interesting, cats are much quicker than any human, more so a cheetah. By quick, I mean reflexive not speed. So, a cheetah can potentially escape your blows, but can maul you at the same time.

So, my bet is on a cheetah, especially if you're not carrying any weapons. A shirt won't help much in this case since the cheetah can easily tear it apart. :)

Answer 4

Well Justin, if that is really a picture of you. I think that you would win cause with that handle bar you got goin' on the cheetah would die laughing first and that would give you the upper hand for sure. LOL just kidding I thing you would have a hard time winning, I doubt your teeth and claws would be a match for a cheetah. Sorry man :)

About the comment that the claws being more like a dogs, I think if you were in a cage with a pissed off dog it could mess you up pretty badly. I believe a cheetah could do more damage for sure! Hey if you ever want to try this make sure to sell tickets, I'm sure alot of people would to see what would happen. Best of luck :)

Answer 5

The cheetah would run you all over that cage until you collapsed from exhaustion, then he would just go for the jugular and kill you that way. You can only do 28 push ups at a time? Try doing more, then put your feet up on a wall. Then take the ultimate balance test, and do push ups in a handstand. Then maybe you'll have a shot.

Answer 6

Well I do know cheetahs are not very powerful, but they are quick. Keep in mind that if you were in a cage with this animal (assuming it is hungry and not winded and an experienced hunter) I think he has a very good chance of killing you as you are not terribly fast even with a head start. Once he runs into you (which is about like being hit with a battering ram), he'll go right for your throat, which is a pretty easy target on a slow creature like a man, and you will either suffocate from his jaws closing off your airway or bleed to death from having it's teeth in your jugular and coratid atrery, or both, but I do know this, you would die for the simple fact that no body I know is stupid or suicidal enough to pull that "large housecat" off you. However I will be perfectly willing to come to your funeral and see what's left of you burried after the cat is finished dining. (hey, only fair, you offer him a meal he should be able to have it.)

Answer 7

While in most cases I'd probably put my money on the human, if it's YOU in the cage with the cheetah, I'm gonna go with the cat.

Once the cheetah catches a glimpse of that cheesy moustache, he'll fling himself towards your face, snarling. When you bring your long, gangly arms up to ward off his attack, he'll sweep your feet from underneath you (a tactic they often use on Thompson's gazelles).

Hitting the ground, the wind knocked out of you, the cheetah will pounce in and get a good grip on your throat with its blunt canines. Your girlish screams will be cut off as the cheetah crushes your windpipe, your spindly limbs flailing wildly and ineffectively against the head and sides of your implacable foe.

Myself, I'd be able to crush the cheetah quickly, but sorry dude, you're a goner.

Answer 8

It depends on the cage and the location. See, if you were able to climb out of reach and eat and drink then after a while your cheetah would die of starvation. Unless you do blind the cheetah with your shirt . Though it is crule- you could jump on it's back and try to choke it. I admit it would be tricky though.

Answer 9

You're right about the Cheetah facts. But you kinda overlooked the speed. The Cheetah can have your jugular in his teeth before you can say, "whoah!" If you're really ready to react with more speed, then you just might win. Well, are ya? :)

Answer 10

I love cheetahs and i think they are one of the best animals. They are not overrated. And anyways the cheetah would probably win.even thought they are the most friendly out of the big cats, if they feel treatened they will attack and you would be gone.