Wife does not have sex or masterbate?

Question

My wife and I have been married for a little over two months but we have lived together for five years. We haven't had sex, we've actually been going through some difficulties. She has also stopped taking her birth control pills before our wedding. She is always home every night, she's very busy at work, doesn't have any suspicious calls on our cell phone bill but I can't help but wonder if she is cheating on me. We've never gone this long without sex, no matter what problems we may have been going through. She doesn't masterbate and we don't have sex. Is it possible for a woman to just love their sex drive all together like this or could she be seeing someone else? Also, we dont kiss either. The only thing I do know that she is doing is talking to this guy friend of hers that lives out of state, but other than that I cant see how she would find the time to cheat. I did see emergency contraceptives in her purse a couple weeks ago that caused a big fight, but she said they were

for us, which i found strange because we got into a big fight two days before and she was threating to divorce me because i was checking up on her. We talked about the pills and she said she threw them away at work after having time to think about it. She wouldn't take the chance of having unprotected sex because of the possibility of getting pregnant, but if she is doing anything the person could be using condoms. Am I just being paranoid?

we've talked about it very much and she has given me lots of reasons like being stressed because of work, being off the pill has changed her body, being tired, and the problems we've had in our past. our honeymoon was great though, had sex almost everyday. but when we got back it just vanished. she has told me the desire just isn't there for her, but she really isn't doing anything to change it.

she's had no bad experiences. she's actually had a pretty premiscious past. like i said, we have never gone this long without sex. our sex life has always been from great to good to at least decent. but this is just non-existent and what does a woman do with those urges if she doesn't take care of herself or have sex with someone?

Answer 1

hmmmmmmmmm counseling

Answer 2

You need professional help.

Brace yourself for the following:

Life doesn't revolve around sex.


Ok, got that? Now...two months isn't that long for a woman who is having second thoughts about whether or not she want's children. She went off birth control before she married you. Not unusual since women frequently imagine that marriage involves children.

Then she went back on birth control, probably because she is having second thoughts about having children. Then...wait...maybe she foolishly gave in to her childhood dreams of having that family with you. Then having geared herself up for sex...probably with her husband since she goes to work and then comes home and that's it...changed her mind again about the children and got some birth control, so that she could test the waters at home, as it were.

Then of course her husband found the birth control and freaked out because god forbid he look at the facts rather than freaking out over what he can imagine.

You yourself say that she has no time to cheat and she comes home every night, yet in the same paragraph you accuse her of cheating anyway.

see a problem with that?

You should. Stop being such a control freak. Try romancing her and treating her like a person in her own right. She is not a possession. And for the love of pete stop checking up on her like that. It's creepy. Especially since all of your invasions have turned up nothing.

You have invaded every aspect of her privacy and found nothing yet you are still convinced she is somehow cheating on you. What? She's invented the teleporter? A time travel device?

If I were that poor woman I'd file for divorce.

Answer 3

Be patient with her. If she's gone off the pills and doesn't want to have a baby, this might be her way of not getting pregnant. The condom's in her purse is a bad sign, why would she need them? She couldv'e stayed on the pill and been Ok. I'd be a little leary of her right now. Something isn't right with her.

Answer 4

Sounds to me like your problems are much deeper than sex. You need to get marriage counseling now. She apparently has no need for any type of physical contact with you right now, which is extremely sad after only 2 months of marriage. I think you are being paranoid, but for the wrong reasons. I dont guess she is having an affair, but wondering why she married you and why this has all happened. I think unless you want to end up divorced, you better get help fast.

Answer 5

Well, with the no sex thing, she may have been abused or raped earlier in her life and sex just doesn't feel right. I had a bad experience when I was younger and it tends to get in the way of me enjoying sex sometimes. What does your gut tell you about her cheating? I don't believe she is, because it really does sound to me like she had a bad experience earlier in life and she just doesn't know how to cope with it. I have had sex with five men in my life and faked it with four of them. After I married my husband I opened up about things from my past and I have never felt so liberated in my life. Please very gently ask her if anything happened to her when she was younger. If it has, help her open up. I'm no doctor, but trust me talking about it will ease so much pain. Good luck and God Bless.

Answer 6

wow...this doesn't sound good. Some women may lost interest in having sex,. I have never had that problem, I have lost interest in the man I was with and things never really worked out for us. have a talk with her and tell her how you feel. If it causes a fight, chances are she's holding back something, I hope she is not cheating on you and I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 7

If she stopped taking her pills then is probably not cheating on you. You also mentioned that she won't kiss you or anything so maybe she has become unattracted to you sexually. You two have been together for awhile. Have you gained some weight or something? Or maybe your marriage is boring now. Do you two ever go out or do anything exciting and if so is it on a regular basis. Maybe in her eyes you are just dull.

Answer 8

sounds to me that she may be cheating with the emergency contraceptives in her purse... if she is having unprotected sex with someone else , she could give you a STD that you can't get rid of (aids, herpes ect..). If it was me i would look into getting an annulment since its only been 2 months, It will never work without trust and what you have said is plenty of reason not to trust her any more.,

Answer 9

some women have a way of putting sex on the back burner ...how they do it I have not figured it yet...my husband only wishes I would...i bug him about sex all the time even after being married for 6 years......... but my friend is like this her and her husband have been married for almost 2 years and they have sex once every month or two....sometimes when I want a little sexually pleasure from my husband I'll ask him if he'll ______________ ( fill in the blank) if I ____________________ ( fill in the blank) most of the time I ask him to use his hands to get me off and I'll give him a full body massage.... maybe that would work for her...

Answer 10

Your paranoia seems justified to me. The way she is acting is sure not normal in any way, and you should get some straight answers from her. If she is cheating on you, and want to end your marriage, she should have no fear of telling you so, but if she want to continue your marriage, there may be something strange going on. I would be a bit paranoid myself if my wife was acting like yours. And about the pills, it is no doubt in my mind that she is having something on the side, sorry dude..
John


and. after two months, this is just extremely strange..

Answer 11

Well maybe she's hiding something. ( That's for sure) She an have a baby from another man buttrying to kill it with birth pills. She probably hates this person. And NEVER spy on her. That's being a bad husband or boyfriend. That mean you don't trust her. If it's destined, in a sudden moment you'll se her secret. Just be patient....