I am a nice girl I really am but I am always the one to get back stabbed or something by my so called friends. As you can see by reading my questions. But if you can email advice or comments and answer my questions I would greatly appreciate that I could use the help I need advice on relationships with my ex and future ones, what to do to get over a broken heart, and maybe even advice on love over all. Thanks
RaQuel
2006-07-13 05:39:54 · 4 answers · asked by youngnready1506 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
"Am I the only one getting an Oops!" message when I am trying to email?"
I wish I could help you on this one but we sound like we have the same problems. We may have problems in relationships because we are TOO nice & people see that & take advantage of it.
Last Christmas my friend had bought me a book entitled "All Men Are Jerks Until Proven Otherwise A Woman's Guide to Understanding Men" by Deanna Schwartz. Do you know why?
Because she had fixed me up with a "nice guy" (her cousin) & he turned out to be a jerk! (His cousin even said so).The same thing you described---all of a sudden stopped calling, writing, & when he did come around he barely spoke. I am not one that usually wants to talk about feelings but I had given him the option to break up about two months we did. During those two months he acted that way.
If you read this book, it does explain a lot, If a man does not make plans to see you while you are together, he usally does not want to have much to do with you at all. The "I'll call you" is just their standard line.
Dating is so difficult. For me it is I will think I have found someone that I have stuff in common with & then as I get to know them I realize that they were just saying they liked the same things to go out with me.
Or they dump me without giving a reason, but then want to come back when they realize how good they had it---I don't think so! One chance is all they get anymore.
It has gotten where I feel like I should have them fill out an application or something before I go out with them so I will not be wasting my time. give my all in a relationship & it seems I am always the one that gets hurt. It seems like the only way to not get hurt is to find someone that cares for you more than you care for them, or at least someone who cares for you more than you let on.
Everyone always says they want someone honest & caring but if that were the case I would have found a mate long ago! )
I hope it gets better for you. The best thing to do is to find someone that cares for you more than you care for them because then they will bend over backwards to try to please you. My sister swears up & down that I should find a dumb man, that because no one else wants them they are likes dogs & try to please their masters.
But intelligence & like interests are all I care about. I would rather be alone than settle. One can be happy by themselves & once in a while you may meet someone that actually is nice back.
A complete answer is really too long to put her & I am getting the error message "Your email did not go through because the recipient\'s email address has not been confirmed. "
2006-07-14 09:59:45 · answer #1 · answered by Selkie 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A broken heart is hard to mend... the only thing that REALLY helps is time. You can occupy your thoughts and ignore the pain your heart is feeling- but it would still be there. As far as getting stabbed in the back, sorry to tell you but that happens to most nice people- including myself. To avoid being stabbed in the back again next time i would give people a chance- one- to do right by me and if they don't then i wouldn't associate with them anymore.
The best general advice I can give you on love is:
Love is the best and the worst feeling. Sometimes it will be great and sometimes it will be horrible. The point of it is that the good outways the bad... But you have to suffer through the bad to find the best of the good.
I hope that was at least a little heplful.
2006-07-13 05:49:47 · answer #2 · answered by NewMommy!!! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want I'll email you my long list of reasons to not go out with a guy, its kinda funny, and part seriose. There is lots of advice I could give you...on life and love, we all have our own ideas...so to many to choose, just be true to your self, and since your a nice girl, here is my tribute to nice girls.
This is my tribute to the nice girls like me
This is my tribute to the nice girls like me. To the nice girls who are overlooked, who become friends and nothing more. We are the girls, wit the girl next door image. We are the girls who spend hours, fixating upon our looks, our personalities and our actions. Why do we do this, because, for some reason we let others actions dictate what we feel about our selves and they make us feel like we must be doing something wrong, if no one has noticed us by now. This is for the girls who don't give it up on the first date, who don't want to play mind games, who provide a comforting hug and a supportive audience for a story they've heard a thousand times. This is for the girls who understand that they aren't perfect and that the guys they're interested in aren't either, for the girls who flirt and laugh and worry and obsess over the slightest glance, whisper, touch, because somehow they are able to keep alive that hope that maybe... maybe this time he'll have understood.
This is my homage to the girls who laugh loud and often, who are themselves no matter what. To the girls who just want to be called beautiful and treated like a princess just once. To the girls who will spend the whole day looking for the perfect present, to the girls who just want to hold hands and cuddle, to the girls who believe and try to achieve their dreams, to the girls who dress cute and not skanky, who show grace under fire and are nice to everyone, even if they dont deserve it. Who give without expecting to receive, and who care without expecting it in return. Who are comfortable in skirts and sweats and combat boots.
To the girls who wont sacrifice themselves and their morals for some guy, who care more than they should for guys who don't deserve their attention. To the girls who just wish hed care, Who get their heart broken because he chose the whore instead and is scared to put her heart out there again, who hopefully wont settle for a jerk. Its for the girls who cry at night because of another heartbreak, and waited by the phone waiting for him to call. Even though she knew he wouldnt, but hoped he would because she always hopes for the best in people. This is for those girls who have been in the trenches, who have watched other girls time and time again fake up and make up and mess up the guys in their lives without saying a word. For the girl who is just looking for that one and only and has had no luck. This is for the girls who have been there from the beginning and have heard the trite words of advice, from "there are plenty of fish in the sea," I dont want to ruin our friendship, to "time heals all wounds." This is to honor those girls who know that guys are just as scared as they are, who know that they deserve better, who are seeking to find it.
Maybe you guys will think the next time you come across a nice girl, they're few and far between... and if you're ever lucky enough to find one, maybe you should keep her around!
Its a good thing that God wont punish us for loving someone who doesnt deserve it. There sure are a lot out there that havent deserved my love or my time
2006-07-13 05:46:37 · answer #3 · answered by lynda_Luv 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why not ask your friends why they take advantage of you if they claim to be your friends? See what they say perhaps they did not even realize what they were doing.
If they are your TRUE friends they will be willing to listen & will care about how you feel.
Good luck
2006-07-13 05:48:23 · answer #4 · answered by start 6-22-06 summer time Mom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋