I feel really bad!?

Question

I was unpacking some boxes which i had some old journals from when i was like 15 (im 21 now) and my husbad picks one up and starts to read it, i had no problem with it cause i had nothing to hide and it was stuff i wrote when i was like really young and way before him. He got upset becuase in there was stuff about my ex-bf and i would say that i love him and stuff like that, my husbad got upet and was telling things like "i thought i was your first love", i tired to explain to him that everything that was in there was in the past and that if i didn't love him I wouldn't be married to him and go through everything we have ever been through, (we've been through alot of drama) What should i do or say?? Im the one that is wrong

Answer 1

Explain to your husband that the journal was from the past and you want to leave the past in the past. Tell him you thought your ex boyfriend was your first love but he showed you what true love is. He is your first true love.

Answer 2

Your really not the one in the wrong if u think about it. He wanted to read it so it was his decision and he undertook it badly. He probley couldnt handle seeing him wife with another man or even saying i love u to another man. He just couldnt handle the past which isnt always great. But in the same part you should have warned him before he read it. You should have told him I was around 15 years old then I didnt know who i was or what i was doing back then so anything you read dont take offencly. And i think he would of still got upset. But not as bad plus he should know you do have a life and he wasnt always going to be there. So what if u had a boyfriend before him, its fine you lived a little, and now ur with him and ur right. If u didnt love him you wouldnt be with him.

Answer 3

Well, I have a scrapbook from when I was 14/15 and there was this guy in there. I wrote little comments that I loved him too. Looking back, (I'm 22 now) I realize I never did love him. I was 15 years old. How would I know what love was back then. It was a teenage crush/infatuation where everything was like a fairy-tale. I am with a guy now. He is my first true love. He was the first person I said "I love you" to. I never said those three words back then to that guy, but I wrote I loved him in my scrapbook. We were teen girls surrounded by hot guys and engulfed with new teen emotions! Tell your husband. I'm sure he'll understand!

Answer 4

There are some things you should let go, do you still feel the way you felt while writing those letters?am sure no. so why still carry the burden around? what i feel you should do is put yourself in your husbands shoes and make the whole scenario look like it was your husband that wronged you// what would you have done in that circumstances?is your husband doing same?or do you feel he is over reacting? whatever your responce is, always remember- human differences, some people have a large heart, some dont and we cant blame them, i think all they need is encouragement. let him know you are sorry if it is possible destroy the letters because am not sure your ex boyfriend is still carrying your letters around.Dont force anything just be cool and nice to him am sure if what he has for you is love he will come around and forgive you.

Answer 5

It sounds like your husband is really immature and has some low self-esteem, I mean come on you were 15 then, you didnt know **** about love the way you do now. You are not in the wrong, I could understand if you were writing these loving feelings down about someone else while you are with him or something but it happened 6 years ago!. He needs to lighten up. Tell him that Trinket from yahoo answers said to "**** off".

Answer 6

Tell him to let the past be the past. that you was 15 and puppy love doesn't count as love. Let him know that he is your first true love and all the others was a thing of thinking that you loved them. He needs to realize that you were 15 when you wrote all that and now you are a grown mature woman that has only love for him. I am sure sure he told some other girl when he was younger that he loved them.

Answer 7

How are you wrong? He read a personal journal from 6 years ago and he's freaking out? Just because you had a 'crush' in HS and believed you were in love does not mean that he's not your first true love.

Um...sounds like he has some issues. Control issues which are the worst kind.

Answer 8

Sounds like he needs to grow up. I put up with one of those for 4 years and then I came to my senses. Now I have someone who doesn't view my past as being more than just my past...and I have to say...I am happier than I have ever been in my life!
And whats all this "I feel bad stuff" You really do need to open your eyes and see that you are not the one to blame here for anything.
Not trying to be mean but I'm just speaking from experience!

Answer 9

Your husband is overreacting. Did you ask him if he had ever had a girlfriend before you? Most people have past relationships before they get married, it's very rare any more that anyone marries the first person they date. And regarding telling someone you love them when you're 15 and marrying a person when you're 21... there's a world of difference.

Answer 10

Your husband is a drama queen. You were a kid, and all of us have boyfriends -- we practice on them to be sure we marry the right guy. Yeah, you should have burned all that stuff, but you didn't... and he's a very insecure guy to think that something like that is threatening (You didn't just pop out of an egg just before you met him, hello!!.) Tell him to get a grip....... You certainly wouldn't have come unglued to find out that he had dated, and maybe even slept with other women..... so again, tell him to get a grip, and if it is really bad, get some counseling. This is trivial.....