We are in a car arguing about continuing to see each other. He says he wants to get married now. I say not a good idea. He asks if I love him.l say yes but I am not ready, I dont trust him. He says it is now or never. I start to remember the girl he was talking to while we were apart. She is part of our reason why we use to argue when we were living together for two years. So I thought I better say yes cuz I will lose him to her. I tell him he is confusing me to please wait til tomorrow. He says no, no and starts to look up instant wedding services in a phone book. He makes the arangements. I say this is not a good idea. He says it is now or nevr. I say fine then never. He starts getting loud and says no. He says he loves me. We go upstairs to his apartment and he ask me if I am ready. I say no. I dont trust him. He says he trustworthy. I remind him of that girl. He promises that he stop talking to her. we marry. I leave to my home. After I leave he calls her. What just happened?
2006-07-13 03:35:17 · 15 answers · asked by beachgirl90 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
When you were a little girl, what did you have in mind for your "dream wedding" Did you play dress up with your dolls, get into your moms makeup and clothes and "pretend"? I expect that you did, most little girls do..
So, how did you get completely railroaded in a marriage that you were forced into. Don't get me wrong, obviously you were not married with a gun to your head, at least literally anyway, and you have to be over 18 at minimum, so you have to accept that you hold some responsiblity for this disaster...
This guy could give a crap about you. You are a piece of property to him and if you don't get out NOW I would expect the next yrs of your life to be somewhere close to hell if not in the burning pit itself. He has an agenda all his own for ANY MAN WORTH A CRAP, WHO LOVED YOU, would want your "dream wedding to happen. At least as close as finances would allow...
The only thing he loves his his reflection in a mirror, he doesn't have a clue about what love is, and frankly, neither do you or you would have RAN, NOT WALKED TO THE NEAREST EXIT on this your "wedding day".
Let the other girl have him. GOOD LUCK TO BAD RUBBISH. Leave NOW.... go home to your family and file for an annulment citing 'marriage under duress"
You hold tight and wait for the man who will truly love you, and keep planning that dream wedding you planned as little girl. It is entirely possible it will happen...
2006-07-19 12:30:38 · answer #1 · answered by jv1104 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That is all your side of the story. I kept contact with my ex when I started dating new because I truly cared for that person. We ended the relationship for a good reason however I stil spent a good portion of my time and soul with that person. It is hard to break up with someone and then just pretend the died or something. Luckily my new partner was very understanding about my ex and didn't get jealous and posessive. Without knowing more about you man, from what you told me... it sounds like you created a lot of this drama. Nonetheless you are right, getting married would be a bad idea.
2006-07-13 03:40:46 · answer #2 · answered by Mike Hunt 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have left many other unanswered questions, has he been violent with you? displayed any type of abusiveness to you? verbal or otherwise?
If not, and if you think that trust is the issue, I would suggest that you both seek counseling. Why the abrupt change and him wanting you to marry him right there and then??? That to me sounds like a red flag. (again, I don'y know if there is any sort of violence, verbal or physical) but statistics have shown that relationships start to frail when he starts to give "orders" and wants to control you, where have you been? who have you been talking to? why are you late?
By him giving you an ultimatum "now or never". I'd look very hard and ask yourself that question. Do I really wnat to live with someone for the rest of my life that gives me ultimatums?..........
Good Luck
2006-07-13 03:45:25 · answer #3 · answered by spanishflyin_tx 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
File for an annulment. You said no and you were forced into something that you didn't want to do. He apparently has too many issues to really know what he wants and what it right. Get away from him, sounds like a creep.
2006-07-13 03:42:58 · answer #4 · answered by redsgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So he manipulated you into getting married to him by forcing a decision against your will and you have to ask? Get the annulment straight away and don't ever go back to him. Do not even take his phone calls. Run, don't walk, away.
2006-07-13 05:45:09 · answer #5 · answered by Saphira 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You got serious screwed that's what just happened! I know how it feels, been there with a similar problem only my marriage lasted 2 years and my relationship lasted 6. I didn't have to wonder what just happened. I just got a divorce period. The guy is a sorry excuse for a man if you ask me.
2006-07-13 03:40:43 · answer #6 · answered by sweetypie9 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in theory, you can have a marriage annulled if there was no sexual intercourse at any time after the wedding.
why did you leave his side after the ceremony? you went home, but not with him.
maybe that's why he called her. at least she will keep him company...you don't seem to.
I think you should find a partner who is emotionally independent, perhaps an older man. definitely someone who isn't needy and controlling.
2006-07-13 03:48:17 · answer #7 · answered by leadbelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chick, you're totally whacked! He's a control freak. Get an annullment now.
2006-07-13 03:41:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Getting married was a mistake. Get it annulled and don't see him again. If he's going to push you into something you don't want to do, he's not the one for you.
2006-07-13 03:39:32 · answer #9 · answered by cucumberlarry1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HE IS NOT TRUSTWORTHY AND MORE THAN LIKELY HE CALLED THAT GIRL TO MAKE U ANGRY SERIOUSLY IF HE HAS A BAD TEMPER AND IF U FEEL U CANT PUT UP WITH IT I WOULD FORGET ABOUT HIM
THERE ARE A LOT OF FISH IN THE SEA SO GO FOR IT
2006-07-13 04:03:13 · answer #10 · answered by JAZY 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋