due to personal family problems i was left the responsability of telling my mother that my nan has passed away, not an easy choice to make but i decided not to tell her but to tell her when the time is right on saying that its only a matter of time before i lose my gramps who is suffering with cancer. the reason why i havent yet told her is due to her habit with alochol and she would use it as an excuse and i couldnt handle it. iam also trying to help her over come her habit and in telling her about her mother would only make her have a relaps
2006-07-13 02:31:26 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Theres no way to know right now if its the right choice you can only hope that the outcome wont be bad.
I think you made a wise decision.
You should however share your fears with your mom of her relapsing(etc) in order to prepare her as you will eventually have to tell her.
2006-07-13 02:42:22 · answer #1 · answered by Sammy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she's trying to overcome a habit I would suggest contacting the AA association and seeing if you could talk to a counciler about how to handle this situation. My dad was a serious alcoholic for the first twenty years of my life and I have dated two recovering alcoholics/addicts so I'm familiar with the situation. I would ask advice from someone who has a lot of professional experience dealing with recovering alcoholics.
2006-07-13 02:47:27 · answer #2 · answered by Kitten 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you haven't. But you must before someone else does. She needs professional help, you can't do it alone. Take her where she can get the help she needs. Don't compound the problem by adding what you keep from her also. Makes for a good excuse to drink and make you feel responsible for it. But your not! Don't get it twisted.You can take the horse to water but you can't make him drink it. She must be ready to help herself, it's something she must be committed to do. That's the only way it can be done. She must save herself with the support of her family. If not....you simply waste your time and effort.
2006-07-13 02:44:28 · answer #3 · answered by dlbrown2211 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mother is grown woman that can make her own choices which as her child is not your responsibiliy and you should feel guilty or responsible for the choices she makes. Ever heard of tuff love? Tell her whats going on and dont blame yourself if she uses it as an excuse to drink, thats a cop-out, not to mention very unfair and selfish.
2006-07-13 02:36:15 · answer #4 · answered by arreis 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quran:114.An-Nas: a million.Say, "I search for secure haven contained in the Lord of mankind, 2.The Sovereign of mankind. 3.The God of mankind, 4.From the evil of the chickening out whisperer - 5.Who whispers [evil] into the breasts of mankind - 6.From between the jinn and mankind." brother - i suggestion u 2 calm down and attempt islam 4 a 365 days atleast - with ramadan fasting and with prayers that muslims do in the course of the 365 days - and through this era ask God the merciful author for coaching - and see wht will ensue - peace [salam]
2016-12-01 05:00:39 · answer #5 · answered by behymer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should set down with your mom and tell her what happen like people say it's better 2 know then not know at all it like a girl that is cheating on u i mean u would like 2 know right and your mother shouldn't hold that excuse on drinking again cause her mom would want her 2 stop tell your mom that and that would get 2 stop and sorry about the hole thing
2006-07-13 02:42:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry for the loss and the troubles. Do you have a priest/pastor or some church leader whom you can confide in. He/she can pass on the message to you mum.
I think you are just trying to protect your mother which is good but she has to know. You cannot do her work you are the child and you need her to be your mother.
2006-07-13 02:46:35 · answer #7 · answered by Ycul72 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a heavy burden to bear but also that's being selfish your mom has to mourn and if that's her way of doing so then let it be. there is no right time to deliver such news but waiting till the person is buried and gone not good.
2006-07-13 02:35:15 · answer #8 · answered by nitenurse 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i thank that u did the right thing cause if you tell her that her mother had pass away than she will go crazy and u dont wont that u want her to be happy but one day u will have to tell herand then see what will happen next.
2006-07-13 02:37:45 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats a horrible choice to have to make.
But I think you've done the right thing.
Now is not the time.
2006-07-13 02:34:31 · answer #10 · answered by Alexander Shannon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋