He is insecure, so he makes up for it through acting as if he's just a playboy who has no concern for other's feelings. How would you approach this kind of person?
2006-07-13 01:51:25 · 10 answers · asked by Molly 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Thanks guys. It's really great to know that there are such good people out there. I'll take all your advice to heart.
2006-07-13 10:18:23 · update #1
well that's how i act. so just just start talking to the guy. i always warm up when someone starts to talk to me and include me into their life. i feel like i'm included, not the 3rd wheel.
2006-07-13 01:56:01 · answer #1 · answered by sherbert 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would move on fast. If interested read the many definitions of passive aggressive on the net. A cold person, is one who hides and if your picking up insecurity, it's a red flag. It might mean shy, but you pointed out cold, and think it's insecure. Any guy that acts like a playboy is a player preying on you. If you like him, just say hi, and go from there, but it might be he's not into you at all, and if he's acting cold, it's a way to avoid having contact with you, and others he's not interested in engaging. Either way, maybe, what you think, having no concern for other's feelings, is correct and scary to me. He must be a very selfish person who will do what it takes to suck others in to get his way. The lack of conern means to me, run....don't worry there are men with good real, great feelings for feeling woman like you....He's not worth it...
2006-07-13 09:01:50 · answer #2 · answered by allwomanequalpercent 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honesty If his defenses are such, that you are unable to tell him this in person, (and you sure it's not just you being a weenie - afraid to tell him to his face), then write him a letter; there is nothing like an emboldened dose of reality, though you have to be prepared for a thousand gazillion billion reasons from him that will tell you all the reasons you are out to lunch. If you tell him your observations, and tell him how it makes you feel when you see him behaving that way, perhaps just maybe, somewhere he can relate to the concept of being "found out" for the false front -- and if you do it with care and compassion, perhaps maybe someday, he will begin to understand that you don't want/need him to behave that way in your presence. You're gonna meet alot of resistance, but if he is worth the effort, and your concern is genuine, over time, he may come to trust you, and begin to act differently. Or maybe not, who knows. You could just go run and tell his mother, but I'm guessin' that wouldn't do much good either. ;) I dunno -- is it worth it? If so, Good Luck to you!
2006-07-13 09:29:40 · answer #3 · answered by amuse4you 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first thing is that this person doesnt know yet the true meaning and joy of a relationship, so he doesnt understand that relationships are accompanied with its own ups and downs.hence he acts insecure and playboyish.
well the only way i see is that you have warm and silent conversations with this person and then slowly and gradually you let this person know that the true joy of any relationship is to take its part of chances and risks.
tagline if this guy/girl understands great or if not move ahead
(not if this person special for you because there is always a solution which our heart provides)
take care
2006-07-13 09:24:01 · answer #4 · answered by paladin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He feels like he is nobody and needs to feel like he is someone but is not getting the attention. He is most likely causing the issues and then acting like it doesn't bother him.
Why ?
This way he is putting himself above it all and making himself that someone. That Mr. Big so to speak.
If you really care for him then you need to show him that he is someone already. Show him that he does not need to be this way to others. That in fact being warmer to others will make him more of a special person.
2006-07-13 10:26:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be kind to them. Sometimes that is all you need to do for them. I'm sorry it's not better advice. but I've had friends like that. It worked for me.
It's really about them finding comfort and trust in you
2006-07-13 09:27:01 · answer #6 · answered by Kristen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shaz has it. You can't do anything for him. He has to do it on his own. Just be a friend and kind, maybe someday you'll gain his trust, but don't push it.
2006-07-13 08:56:29 · answer #7 · answered by Nic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a friend and nothing more since until they figure it out for themselves nothing really to be done
2006-07-13 08:55:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
just leave him 2 it, moody mini! all you can do is be there for him, eventually he may soften but you gotta be prepared to wait!
2006-07-13 08:56:22 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
fire and ice.
show interest then back off.
keep teasing him until he gets curious.
2006-07-14 10:32:28 · answer #10 · answered by leadbelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋