How do you deal with some one you work with that drives you up the wall?

Question

I have a lady I work with that she has to be in everything, if you are talking to someone else she have to come over and get in. She even when you say did something, she would have to come in and say she has done it and she done it better. She has a daughter that just had a baby and she asks like her daughter is the first woman that had a c-section. I have tried putting music on at my desk, I have even stop talking to the person I am talking to and walk away. She makes my blood rise. Please help me so I don't end up saying something to hurt her feelings and/or get fired.

Answer 1

Are you talking about Eileen? I think there is 1 in EVERY office. Here's how to look at it in the proper way - so you don't get in trouble. She has NO LIFE!! She is SO desperate for attention that she will go to ANY means to get it! She has NO self-esteem and no people skills so to her what she is doing is sharing, being included - when to everyone else she is just being a pain in the ***. Look at it that way, feel sorry for her - bite your tongue and stop any conversation when she approaches, turn and walk away - she will get the picture (hopefully!)

Answer 2

I have dealt with that type, too. Keep quiet until others notice. They will eventually see what you see (probably already do). Just keep your mind on work and remember you're not at work to socialize at all anyway. But you do not have to talk to her when she comes over, you can look confused and say, can I help you? And stop the conversation completely.

edited to add, Ms. Frogette, we had pretty much the same answer, but I was typing when you posted and did not read it prior to posting mine! It was just a coincidence! Must be the right thing to do.

Answer 3

ok- you already have some pretty good answers. personally i would pull her to the side and let her know her intrusions are disturbing your work. whatever you say to her, make it UN personal as possible and let her know that she is being a distraction to your WORK. that is why both of you are there is to WORK. slow down you other visitors somewhat. change up the atmosphere. maybe she really is just trying to be helpful, but as long as she sees you interacting with other she will want to join in. im not saying turn a cold shoulder to your co-workers, but slow down ALL non-work related conversations. keep it buisness and simple. i went through something simliar and tried everything to get the hell away from this lady. that advice right there worked great for me. i go to work for the $$ not to make friends...lolol

Answer 4

You need to courteous, but to the point. Sometimes you just have to grin and bear it. I do not tolerate people interrupting or edging themselves into my conversations. Also, brush up on your cattiness skills. There are ways to make people back off without them even realizing that that is what you are doing. Talk with a strong female friend that you admire and ask her to give you some pointers for different situations. Good luck.

Answer 5

When she butts into your conversation, try looking at her like you're SHOCKED she'd be so rude as to interrupt (yes, even though you're really not). Then, when she finishes her braggardly anecdote of the hour, just turn to whomever you were talking to prior to the interruption and say, "Excuse me, what I was trying to tell you before was..." Eventually she'll notice that she's being rude, and hopefully be slightly flattered that you were acting like you expected better from her, rather than just having hurt feelings. Good luck!

Answer 6

i had a co worker that i could not get along with. she was alot like what you described. i let my frustration fester until one day i blew up at her and we had a pretty heated argument. i left the room and went to the break area, she followed me and said this " we need to talk, we are co workers and i am not going to spend everyday working like this, this is just ridiculous!" well, i broke out laughing, we talked and actually was able to tolerate each other. (notice i did not say we became good friends or anything, but isn't tolerating each other enough.) so my advice, talk to her. you never know, she might not like you either, but at least you would have something in common and be able to get through your day.

Answer 7

Talk to her about it. Say you don't want to hurt her but that you can't go on like this. Tell her what her behaviour causes you to do.

Maybe she will change behaviour.

Otherwise, you still have the possibility to talk to the human resource manager asking for another room... but that might be hard. I don't think you'd get fired just for asking. Maybe he also knows another solution.

Answer 8

check out

www.tesh.com

there is an article related to people at work and how to deal with them. I think just click on the work link. Her has lots of great tip for everything in life. Good luck.

Answer 9

HMM....YOU SEEM TO BE ALWAYS IN AN IRRITABLE TONE IN YOUR WORK...Well, what I would suggest is that you start making a list of her STRENGTHS and try affirming her. What I feel she really needs is attention. And the right form of attention that you could give her is to affirm her and not to nag or scorn her, right?

This might be difficult at the start, but it is good to start doing it before ......like what you said, hurt her feeling and/or you get fired.

ALL THE BEST.

Answer 10

Ask her out to lunch, and POLITELY explain your feelings. If that doesn't work have a bunch of Friends call your job and have them ask if she's still "Selling drugs". (REPEATLY)Then she'll get FIRED. DON'T LAUGH a disgruntled girlfriend did this to a CO-WORKER. And it worked.