my ex dosent help at all with our son and my boyfriend does everything for him thats why am always arguing with my boyfriend and with myex help!!!
2006-07-12 17:45:46 · 16 answers · asked by lonely and sad 7/20/05 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Your ex needs to live up to his responsibilities as a parent, however I don't think it is in a child's best interests to be denied visits to his father, unless he's abusive. I know you want to punish your ex, but it's not worth punishing your son. You need to take the high road and set an example for him.
Kids aren't dumb, if he doesn't want to see his dad, he'll probably tell you. He'll figure out on his own what his dad is like, and when he's older, he will appreciate you allowing him the opportunity to develop his own opinion. He will also realize everything your boyfriend has done for him.
2006-07-12 17:50:53 · answer #1 · answered by BB 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By law If he doesn't pay any child support he has no rights. To solve the problems with your boyfriend you must be strong. Next time your ex calls tell him my first sentence. I'd then tell him not to call again unless he is prepared to be a responsible father and help take care of his child. When he does call again, I wouldn't answer. After a few calls and possibly hateful voice mail or messages that you will save and record on recorder report him for harassment. You don't want your child to have someone in his life that can't even own up to his own responsibility. At least I wouldn't. It seems that your boyfriend is the kind of man your child really needs in his life. I know it's hard to deny the father of your son visitation, but if it's causing problems with your new love...it's almost having to choose one over the other...see if it works. maybe he'll start helping out more to see his son and you all will be able to co-exist
2006-07-13 00:56:36 · answer #2 · answered by lasagna_chick 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take the father for child support, so that he does that much if nothing more. Try to arrange visitation between your ex and your child at someone that you trust house. That way your boyfriend don't have to deal with your ex and you don't have to worry about your ex being with your son.
2006-07-13 00:53:29 · answer #3 · answered by babydoll121070 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Always allow your son to spend time with his father once your son gets older he can make up his own mind who he wants to be with. Sounds like you have a good man now but he is not your sons father maybe one day your ex will do for his son until then hope that your relationship works good luck.............
2006-07-13 00:54:58 · answer #4 · answered by getatjayr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your ex-husband should really be living up to his responsibilities. Why doesn't he mind his son for the weekend? That way you and your new boyfriend can spend some time alone together.... his probably slacking off because he doesn't want that to happen.
2006-07-13 00:51:26 · answer #5 · answered by Jenni 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you gone through the court system?? Are you legally able to keep your ex froming seeing his son? I think that the father should not be denied the ability to visit with his son unless a court says so.
2006-07-13 00:47:50 · answer #6 · answered by ShineOnYouCrazyDiamond 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately for you and your seemingly wonderful boyfriend, you're going to have to let the boy see his father. Your son only knows one thing, that's his dad and he loves him and as long as he's not a physical or emotional threat to him - sorry, but being an adult means doing things that really suck.
As your son gets older he will see all that you and your boyfriend did for him and love and respect you both for doing it while allowing him to know his biological dad. It's tough to be the bigger person but you have to ask yourself: Am I not letting my son see his father for his benefit or for my boyfriends benefit?
2006-07-13 01:19:25 · answer #7 · answered by Lotus Phoenix 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you should let your ex see his son regardless. If he's not willingly helping you out with his son, have you tried to get child support from the courts?
2006-07-13 00:54:02 · answer #8 · answered by Sonya 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
More importantly, don't you think your son should be able to see his dad, especially if his dad wants to see him. Just because you and your husband or divorced/separated, that is not the relationship your son shares with his father.
2006-07-13 00:48:40 · answer #9 · answered by amoreflowers 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am going through the same problem. My boys are now 12 and 15 so I leave it up to them, but before they were that age I told him the only way he could see them was to help raise them. He didn't want to give me any money so he didn't see his kids
2006-07-13 00:50:43 · answer #10 · answered by Criss 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋