You and your wife were married for 18 yrs. You worked days,she worked nights so that you would not have to pay for childcare,have somebody else raise your kids. You had all the benifits ie:medical, dental,retirement plan etc.. She worked at menial jobs to help suppliment your income that came with non of the above. By the way you are military, move alot and it would be harder for her to get a career type job. She took care of everything else , housekeeping cooking, school PTA's and roommom, chauffer to all the kids games. Homecooked meal always on the table before she left for work, house clean and kids ready for bed. You decide that you have been missing something all these yrs, namely your old high school sweetheart. You divorce this wife and remarry within 3 months. Now your retirement has come, you know since you did the taxes for yrs that your ex put alot of money into your life. But you don't want to share.. Divorce decree says 50%. Why would you try and get out of it?
2006-07-12 17:07:55 · 11 answers · asked by Fancygal 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think that this type of man feels a sense of entitlement to do as he pleases. THERE IS AN ISSUE OF RESPECT HERE--this type of man does not respect you, your contribution, your pain. Or his shortcomings. For years, you worked and sacrificed--he still expects that of you.
He wants to get out of the 50% split because less money for you means more money for him and his honey.
If you can, ask for rehabilitative alimony--that is money to help you get more education or skills that will help you be more able to support yourself. Also, since you did not have jobs that contributed to your retirement fund, make sure you have retirement funds in your name--50% of his. If you have no healthcare, you should not suffer because of the divorce--ask for him to pay for a health insurance policy so that you are not left without coverage.
2006-07-12 17:34:00 · answer #1 · answered by fabulousisjane 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is your situation, everyone's is different. I am military also. I stayed in Recruiting in the California Bay Area and married my love of my life. We had a beautiful little boy, I worked so hard so she could live her dream of being a Stay At Home Mother, and 3 years later, she left me for a career of her own and took my son 200 miles away. Not everyone is wronged in a divorce, but everyone is wronged. It is perception and reality. My ex is the victim because she is burdened with a mortgage and car payment on the home and car she wanted and had me purchase just before leaving me. She even expected me to pay those things and child support.
Maybe you should look at it like I do...a chance to renew life, to move forward, to find the one that IS right for you. Just as I have done. My best friend, a woman that helped me through everything that happened later, one day became the woman I realized I loved, that she was what I have always wanted in my life. She is more than I ever knew I'd find and more than I expected a woman to ever be. In 22 days, she will become my wife, and I have never felt happier, loved and content with my life.
2006-07-12 17:40:31 · answer #2 · answered by Mark W 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is being a selfish jerk. That is why there are laws to help people such as this.....by law (varies by state), the woman would be entitled to 50% of ALL assets including retirement....what he dont offer, demand through an attorney.
2006-07-12 17:55:31 · answer #3 · answered by nativeamerican1968 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dang... that is screwed up. I came into this thread ready to make a snide comment but it sounds like you deserve half of that... His new wife certainly should not be entitled to enjoy it and if he were any kind of man, he'd realize it... You worked hard too... without you, he would not have had an oppurtunity to save so much.
Too bad he doesn't realize it.
2006-07-12 17:40:40 · answer #4 · answered by hyperhealer3 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the decree says 50% then that is it. But in many states if their are not children to support then it is over and you got screwed over but that is what divorce is about. But then you don't have to do anything for him anymore either.
2006-07-12 17:13:02 · answer #5 · answered by Elwood 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the right ingredient to do is ask him in writing for the compensation of the non-public loan. furnish him a charge plan of say 50dollars a month. provide him 30 days to pay or start up paying the month-to-month quantity and then take the declare to the small claims court, once you've them in u.s.. this may be adequate to bounce start up him into action. talk about that a judgement adverse to him may smash any probability of credit contained in the destiny. also he may be answerable for the prices incurred in pursuing the declare.
2016-12-01 04:36:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are too good for this scum. But unfortunantly, if thats what the decree says, then that's what it is. He's probably doing you a favour by leaving anyway.. hes trash.
2006-07-12 17:28:11 · answer #7 · answered by vicksta1984 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because some people are not decent. Stop worrying about the why because you will never understand it, and move on and do the best you can for your children.
2006-07-12 17:23:58 · answer #8 · answered by momma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men don't want to pay their ex's because we HATE the slu*s!
2006-07-12 17:40:45 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
cause thier Dogs
2006-07-12 17:25:39 · answer #10 · answered by Deshawn & Keshawn's mom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋