3 years ago my fiance confesssed to me that his uncle molested him when he was a child & I just learned that the boy I am caring for who is 15 yrs old was molested by the same person. I asked my fiance mother to go with me while I confront her brother & she told me they should deal with it, it wasnt my place. Like hell! My response to her was "that is your son we are speaking of and they are not going to confront him!" I followed my mind and I did confront him. Peacefully. . He didnt deny it nor did he admit to it. I asked him to face them and to apologize. I know it wont change things but its a start. Noone wants to ruin this mans life so we kind of left it like that. Me & my fiance asked the boy if he wanted 2 press charges he said yes & My fiance was actually glad that I confronted him. The next step is counseling. But have I made the right decisions so far Im leaving this one in gods hands for now.
2006-07-12 16:29:44 · 12 answers · asked by 2 real 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Good for you. That took courage!
2006-07-12 16:34:06 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Laws vary from state to states, but I am pretty sure that in most jurisdictions you actually have a legal obligation to report the crime (or risk being charges as an accessory after the fact).
I'm glad you chose to confront the individual... right now they ALL need counseling... the offender, your fiance and the 15 year old victim.
Sexual molestation is part of a cycle of sexually dysfunctional behavior. Sometimes children who are molested grow up and molest children themselves... it is a cycle that can be broken with counseling for the vicitms and intesive therapy for the perpetrator. Of course, because children have been harmed, the offender will very likely be incarcerated. Suggest that he use that time to get the help he needs so he doesn't re-offend.
2006-07-12 16:43:24 · answer #2 · answered by Rev T L Clark 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am proud of you for taking the step to confront this person and yes I think that you should report this to the police. I am glad that you and your fiance are in counseling . keep up the good work you are on the right track. I speak this cause I am a victim too.
2006-07-13 04:19:57 · answer #3 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My friend was molested by her father for years and never did anything, her daughter was molested to and only minor legal actions were taken. I say these men need the severest punishment, verbal confrontations do nothing peacefully or agressively.
The courts need to brought into these situations and the perp. will definitely suffer the consequences, and thats a START.
You personally maybe wasting your time in your fiances case but the minor, you have every right to do anything and everything.
2006-07-12 16:36:43 · answer #4 · answered by sincerely, see me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should go to the authorities. You don't know how many other people he has also molested There may be lots of people.
No one wants to ruin this mans life? What about the lives of the other people he has possibly ruined? If he has done it twice, I would take odds that he has done it many, many times that have not surfaced yet. It needs to be stopped.
2006-07-12 16:45:46 · answer #5 · answered by wires 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope you are pressing charges for your adopted son against that man, I know it can be hard, and I'm sure you don't want to ruin that mans life, but think about him hurting the two people that you love, and you never know if he is going to do it again, he needs to be taught a lesson and there are never any charges pressed then he will never learn.
2006-07-12 16:37:41 · answer #6 · answered by Mr. No 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you are making the right steps.. one thing if he did it twice already he could be able to do it again... they should not take this so lightly i do not think... i would have already went to the authorities myself...you can be responsible if you have morals to you if this man does this again...so someone should do something....i understand you do not want to ruin anyones life, but do you think he has done some damage to others?? you do or you would not bring this question up...
2006-07-12 16:35:44 · answer #7 · answered by sanangel 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a criminal offense. It should be reported to the police. Apologizing will not stop him. He should be in jail. You are morally obligated to report it to the police because you know about it. It's in your hands not gods right now.
2006-07-12 16:39:44 · answer #8 · answered by hawkthree 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your fiance is an *** for not telling you and if he did you should have known better to leave the child with him. i'm sure you didn't know but he did and could have and should have prevented it from happening in the first place.
2006-07-12 16:39:38 · answer #9 · answered by pisces 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u made a good decision
2006-07-12 16:36:14 · answer #10 · answered by .:BaBy J:. 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋