My sis wants me to be goth, what should I do?

Question

I want to be goth, but my parents will blame my sis and they will be sad cause I'm the only semi-happy person in the family...>.<

Answer 1

It is not your responsibility to bear the sunny disposition for your entire family - though it is hard to be sunny and goth at the same time. Do what you want to do and make sure your folks know you are doing it because YOU want to. Tell them it makes you happy to express yourself to the world at large this way. Then you can still be the semi-happy one in the family.

Peace!

Answer 2

Well first off, don't create stress in the family, that isn't ever good. Second, why do you want to be goth...because your sister is, because its different, because some of your friends are or what?

Also, maybe you should have a talk with your parents about what goth is. Many people see it as being evil or bad, when really its just a form of expression. You can be a good person and still be goth. Yes, you do have to worry somewhat about some people who take it too far.

Most importantly, you should try to be who you want to be for yourself. Remember, there is a negative stigmatism associated with goth. Sure its easy to dismiss that as stuck ups or pruds or whatever, but it still impacts your self image. That negative feedback isn't healthy.

Think about these kinds of things. It's ok to be goth if that's who you want to be, but there are other factors here to consider. Talk to your sis and your parents. Ask them to be open-minded because you really want to talk honestly. They should respect that and listen as well.

Answer 3

You don't want to be goth just b/c your sister is and you look up to her and want to be like her. You become goth b/c that's who you want to be. And I'm not goth, but those people just look like depressed, life hating, vampires. I'm not saying they are or they all feel that way, but that's how people view them. So if that's what you want, then do it, but don't do ANYTHING just b/c someone else wants you to. And if you REALLY want to and aren't just b/c your parents will blame your sister, then just discreetly do it. Start of with little things at first and then add more and more as the days/weeks/months/years pass. By the time you go totally goth, you may be sick of it. Or just tell them that it's just a fad, and like all fads, it will fade one day, just let you and your sis be who you choose to be, that is how you develop into your own person and who you want to be to determine your place in the world. If they suffocate you, you will just end up rebelling and making things worse, if they let you do it w/o making a big deal out of it, you two might not be so interested in it.

Answer 4

Your last sentence is probably why your parents don't want you to be Goth. You are associating being unhappy with being Goth, and that's your first problem. I have plenty of Goth friends who are just as happy as other stereotypes. It's your personality that defines you, not your looks. You should be who you want to be and if that is Goth, then go for it. As long as you know your roots, you should be grounded enough to have the same personality no matter what you look like.

Answer 5

why put yourself through all that. happy is better. start going goth and you let some of the darkest and strangest people into your life. sooner or later the semi happiness you feel will be gone! goth is not just a fashion statement. it becomes a way of life for some. i know several teens who went goth to keep people at a distance. and others are self mutilators and yet others are full of doom and gloom. and that is just a sample of some of the teens i have met when my son went goth. luckily it was a passing phase.

Answer 6

you know that thing your parents are saying..."Its just a phase" Please trust them. It will only last a little while. You real realize that your not gettin the desired reaction. Dont waste ur time. Y do you want to be goth anyway? Goth is so 1990's. Nobody is goth anymore. Now it's "EMO" lol but im just someone you will never meet so if its gonna make you happy... do it. Be yourself. Best advice ever!

Answer 7

Be who you are...
If you are goth, because you want to be, and not because your sister wants you to be... feeling you have to hide this from your parents will probably cause some feelings of conflict within yourself, but you may decide that this is better than causing out-and-out conflict throughout your family.
The choice is yours, ultimately.
Not your sister's... not your parents'...

There are innumerable varieties of "gothic"... victorian, cyber, punk, rivet, loli, graveyard... even new-age hippie varieties that believe in going the natural organic route. And then there is the perky goth... putting the ROMANCE back into NECROMANCY!

Goth = sad? What a crock...
I guess I am a little bitter about that stereotype because I was kinda sad and lonely... BEFORE I discovered this whole gothic subculture. I was a nerdy little reject, and it seemed there was no one else who understood the world as I saw it. Suddenly, it seemed that there was a whole new world that opened up, populated by intelligent, thoughtful people, who held a deep love in their hearts for music and literature and all things artistic...
More than a passing teenage phase, I've stuck with it for the past thirteen years. I've caught some crap from ignorant jackholes, but even my mom has come to accept that this is how I am. She likes some of my music, even! And she knows I look good.

You're really lucky to have a sibling who wants to share her world with you.

Have you seen the movie "Ginger Snaps"?
It's about sisters... and werewolves...

Answer 8

This is so ridiculous....goth is a way of dressing...is there some rule book that says if you become goth your not allowed to be happy.....kids and there groups....too funny....get over it...once your out of high school you'll realize what a phase all this crap is...and you can be happy no matter how you dress.

Answer 9

Do you want to be goth because of your sister or do you just like the way it looks? You can dress up goth and still be your self... you dont have to adopt to the ways of the goths...be yourself...and if that means slaping on some black lipstick then do it... and if your parents disaprove then convence them that its just a phase and you wont be dressing like this forever...

Answer 10

i was goth for a long, long time, and its nothing to be ashamed of if you want to, then do it if u dont then dont, and if ur parents hassle ur sister, or u tell them to back off because its ur decision as a person to make... Just because somebody is gothic doesnt mean that there not happy, its just the stereotype of todays society that all goths are supposed to be suicidal and depressed, i never was when i was goth... in the long run u should do wat u want to because ull hurt urself more later on if you dont...