should i get married...help?

Question

ive got engaged to be married about two months ago...the thing is...all weve done is argue with each other and get on each others nerves ever since...i feel i want out...but i do love her very much..but if i call it off...we will fall out for good as i know it will upset her to much...what should i do??

Answer 1

Better to take a chance at someone getting mad now that living a life of hell..............perhaps she turned into a Bridezilla.......you know a real pain trying to plan the perfect BIG wedding. Who knows, but follow your GUT, as it's always right. Of course, you really should pray about this and also get premarital counseling from your local minister or priest. It may be a bit of trouble going each week, but you will never regret it and she won't either.

Answer 2

Tell her how you feel. The way things have been going sound like you guys need some issues straightned out. It however doesn't mean that you guys can't have a future together or anything of the sort. Since you guys do love eachother, i just suggest you guys just talk about the way things have been going and give eachother some time for the issues to be resolved. When deciding whether or not marrying her would be a good idea, consider if there has been anything going on recently that has caused her to act this way. If things dont get better between you too, you can always try counseling

Answer 3

I think you too need to sit down and talk - without arguing! You certainly need to find out why it is you argue and get on each others' nerves and that can only be done by LISTENING to each other!

It might be a good idea to talk about postponing the wedding ... there are loads of viable reasons why you might (unless you are being pressured by parents, of course).

Getting married - arranging the wedding and dealing with future in-laws who may have other ideas - is all very stressful. Try to find out what is getting on each other's nerves and what you are ACTUALLY arguing about (it isn't always about what the words say). Don't forget to tell her just how much and why you love her, either.

You certainly do need to call pax or 'time out' and take a look at your relationship. Sometimes it helps to enlist the help of a very good mutual friend.

Answer 4

Do you have a future together? Arguing may be because of nerves, or maybe because of second thoughts. Discuss with her your future, what do you both want? What are your common goals? Is there ANY possibility that either of you think it won't work and will end in divorce? Can you work out your differences and work together? Marriage is about comprimise and giving, do you both feel marriage is based on the same things? If you still feel she may not be right, you are better to call it off so both of you can find what you really want. If it doen't work out you will both be hurt and it would be hard. But Divorce hurts everyone, family and children and all. You don't want to go through that.

Answer 5

You have to sit down and talk about this; it might be weding nerves, or it might be that she had changed her mind and is all uptight because she cant think of a way to tell you. If she loves you, she will be relieved to be able to sit down and tell you what is wrong, or what she would like to be different. Does her family want a big flashy wedding when she just wants to go an do things quietly? Is she not sure how much you love her? Is she worried about losing you to somebody else? There are all manner of things that could be causing this, but dont marry until you find out whats wrong- marriage is not a cure!

Answer 6

Before trying any form of counselling or anything else, think over in your own mind what you really want, do you really want to be with this girl in marriage, or do you not? remember, you've only been engaged for what was it, 2 months? dont put so much pressure about the wedding and everything on yourself already, that can wait. just figure out hat you want, and bear it in mind. then go and talk this out with your other half, jsut talk quietly and calmly, explain to her that your having some doubts and wories, ask her if she's having the same ones, talk it out between you. then if that doesnt work, but you both agree that you want to make a go of it, perhaps try counselling then

Answer 7

I think for just a moment think about how things were before you proposed. Sit down with each other and try to figure out why you are arguing so much and try to fix the problem. If you both can't figure out what the problem is take a break from each other to figure out is getting married something you both really want to do. If you both want to get married to each other work things out. If you love each other and care for each other it will work out for the better. Go out for a nice romantic dinner and give her some flowers and take it from there.

Answer 8

try counseling. i know it sounds really stupid to get counseling before you're married, but in some cases it can prevent divorces a year down the road. i was engaged to the same guy twice. the first time, i just didn't feel that i as ready and called it off. we took some time apart for a few months and then got back together. it fell apart in the end, but i'm not sorry. i would rather call off a wedding at the altar, then have to pay for a divorce later.

Answer 9

It is better to be honest now.

Consider marriage counseling. I have a great relationship with my fiance, but marriage counseling has helped us to know each other better and to learn how to communicate with each other. Counseling isn't just for problems but for mutual growth.

Don't get married unless you can learn to resolve your issues in love and kindness. Remember: kindness is the key to a happy marriage, not communication. You can communicate your way into a divorce any day, but kindness on both your parts can make your marriage last.

If you have already made the decision that you want to leave, you must do so kindly and honestly. Don't prolong the pain, or get more involved if you have already decided.

Best wishes.

Answer 10

basicaly dude just tell her ur going to put the wedding off until u both start getting along better u dont want to rush into marriage but like i had to leaurn if u love this girl its not worth argueing over anything its a waist of time if shes speacial to u just try turning every bad thing into a joke or just make it funny even if she starts it it really doesnt matter but im not staying stay with her if shes a crazy woman but try to make everything bad turn to good because u never know how much time u have with somone speacial until there gone so make shure u know what u want before jumping into a marriage .