when I was younger my step-dad touched my breast and showed me his penis and asked me to touch it.
I think I should tell my mom...but I don't think she would believe me.
Can you please give me some advice on how to deal w/ this?
2006-07-12 12:35:32 · 16 answers · asked by sandiegogal2002@yahoo.com 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I was in my early 20's and he was in his late 40's early 50's. Does that make a difference?
2006-07-12 12:46:59 · update #1
i am 31 now.i still do think about it from time to time and i do feel guilty and sometimes wonder if somehow i was at fault.
2006-07-12 16:23:39 · update #2
You should definitely tell your mom...she may not believe you but you need to try for your own sake. There is alot you didn't tell us...how old were you then? and now?... has he done it again?...are you still living with him? Women can sometimes be blind to situations like this for a variety of reasons but it is inexcusable behavior on the part of your stepdad in any case. Your mother may not want to hear anything bad about him and if that happens you should talk to another trusted adult. The main thing to remember is that it was not your fault!
Good luck!
I just read your additional comments and I think it does make a difference but only in the sense that you were both adults at the time which takes the child molestation factor out of it. He was still way out of line but if you are no longer at home and you don't have any younger sisters that might be vulnerable to him then you just need to worry about yourself...talk to somebody...maybe a psychologist...and get this off your chest.
2006-07-12 12:48:26 · answer #1 · answered by marlio 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well I don't know how to answer this question u are missing some detail like how old when he did this happen and how long ago, anyway u do need to tell your mother about this ASAP and she should believe u and if she don't well the next time it happens get on the phone and call the police and that will make a believer out of both of them,because if he touch u while u were a minor he has commited a serious crime.
2006-07-12 12:43:14 · answer #2 · answered by jerryhmusic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your mum should know no matter how old you were, and I think you need to use some compassion when telling her, this is the man she has put all her trust into, all her love, so tread carefully, did it happen to other members of the family? perhaps speaking to an older/ younger sister or brother would help you make a decision. I have a partner that isnt my daughters true dad and it would kill me to find out he hurt my daughter, 2 reasons, hurting my daughter is hurting me, and betraying the trust I had given him, good luck for the future, seek some help to come to terms with this and dont dwell too much on the past look forward to the future, and DO NOT BLAME YOURSELF
2006-07-12 12:51:38 · answer #3 · answered by mandy_reilly2001 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Write a letter to your mom about it dated and all that proper stuff. keep it hidden for now and try talking with your mom about that type of things (not necessarily saying it happened) and feel her thoughts on the subject. then go from there, maybe give her the letter the day you move out on your own. It could be that she doesn't see a problem with that type of behavior.
You could go totally backwards and start going around the house topless (or less) as if that is normal and explain that is what s.dad expects when she's not around. Maybe she would get a hint.
2006-07-12 12:48:51 · answer #4 · answered by Robert F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, I don't really know how to answer................ you have to do what you think is best. How long ago did it happen ? Was that the only time ?
I would more than likely tell her.That is something that should have never happened, no matter what the reason.If and when you tell her start off with something like you have something on your mind that is bothering you. And you need to tell someone , and that certain someone should be her.
But like I said, I can't tell you what to do. You have to do what you think is the right thing to do.
Good Luck and God Bless !!!!!!!
2006-07-12 12:44:33 · answer #5 · answered by country girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well how old are you know? And is their any young children at home that he could do that again? But you should talk to mom just start with mom I have something to tell I have keep this inside for a while but I think you should know and then just tell her she would understand + children come first good luck
2006-07-12 12:42:58 · answer #6 · answered by HONEY 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This will be up to you.....but I'd watch children around him. Also, if it is bothering you, maybe you should contact an attorney. I don't believe that there is a statue of limitations. Of course, it'll be your word against his, and the burden of proof will be on you. If you do file charges against him, then you and your mom's relationship may suffer. Think about all this and best of luck to you....i hope you get over this.
2006-07-12 12:40:20 · answer #7 · answered by cajunrescuemedic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if it still bothers u tell her, then get urself some counselling and there are even criminal charges that can be brought against ur stepdad. i have a friend who was assaulted in a similar way by a boss. if ur mom chooses him over u at least u know that now and wont wonder ur life away. may God bless you, take care
2006-07-12 13:32:54 · answer #8 · answered by keziah 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this is a real question then what the hell did you scream and yell at him did you kick him in his wrinkled up old balls? I would have went right up to my mom and called out this a hole.
2006-07-12 12:54:10 · answer #9 · answered by gracie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes that's is nasty that is not good at all because that's your dad well step dad and he shouldn't do to that to you and it depends if u let him do to u or wasn't by choice either way u shouldn't do that second you should tell your mom because she needs to know and if he does that again you need to cal the police
2006-07-12 12:45:27 · answer #10 · answered by tweetyladyc1029 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋