Have 2 sons still at home 19 and 21. Like to hang out and 'kick it' but don't want to work.?

Question

They both have cars paid for by Mom and Dad plus cell phones.
!9 year old did not graduate and has cost us so far 8000 dollars in attorneys fee for something he 'did not' do. I am step Dad. Mom don't listen to me! HELP!

Answer 1

Seems like your feelings aren't being respected here. If this is your home and money, you have a say in the rules. These guys can pay rent. If they can't pay in cash they can pay in services. I would have a talk with mom and tell her this can't go on. She is enabling. Maybe the boys should go live with Dad.

Answer 2

Time for some tough love Dad. The boys are old enough to face the realities of the real world. Take them aside when Moms not around and explain a few man to man facts of life, if you know what I mean. The time for the maximum ultimatum has come for those boys, and with mom too if needbe. They will be alright, just kickin it and bustin a move or whatever these kids do nowadays some place else other than mom and dads. Like the Nike shoe commercials say,"just do it" good luck

Answer 3

They both need to get lost and stop mooching. You need to put your foot down and tell your wife they need to go. They are eating your food and mooching your money and everything else, right? Next time the 19 year old gets in trouble, don't bail him out,he's not a child. It's really hard to give advice,just keep talking to your wife about it,tell her that in the long run she is doing them more harm then good. I've seen this type of thing before. My grandma let her son mooch off of her and abuse her and he is in his late forties, he finally ,FINALLY moved out though. So many people would tell her not to put up with him, but she wouldn't listen either. It made the whole family sick for years. Good luck, I hope you can get the moochers out of your house SOON.

Answer 4

run dude the situation just gets worst. the step-dad gets no respect. sure he didn't do it. that's why he had to get an attorney. plus what does it matter to you if they sit around the house your just the step-dad. i definitely would not foot any bills for them. or buy them anything. nor would i chip in to pay for an attorney let their mom and dad spoil them. if they want to sit around let them they're the one that will pay for it in the long run. just make sure they don't mess with your sh1t. make sure to set the boundaries when it come to you. they will respect strength. instead of posting this question you should have gone down to the nearest sporting goods store and bought a bat. aluminum preferably.

Answer 5

It is true what they say about TOUGH LOVE, it works! If you are suppose to the man of the house. The back bone, than take your spine back. Step up to the plate. Mom don't want to listen, fine she'll have to listen or suffer like the rest of them. You have to have the do right or get gone attitude. It's in you just bring it out. Unless your not tired yet?

Answer 6

I have three sons and remember the kickin days they didnt want to work..... but hey why should they if Mom and Dad are still taking responsibility???? Let them go!!! You are not doing them any favors by not teaching them to stand up and be men.

Answer 7

I like to "KICK IT" too, and when my kids tried this, they got "KICKED OUT". These young men (they are not children) are obviously being coddled and not being forced to deal with reality (how nice for society). The people responsible for that are enabling this to happen (thank YOU).

Answer 8

SEE IF CONCELING WILL HELP AND MAKE THEM GET THERE DIPLOMA AND GET A JOB

Answer 9

cool