my husband and i went to a club the other night w/a bunch of other ppl. some we knew, some we didnt. while dirty dancing w/my husband this woman i had just met came up behind me and started grinding on me. OMG! it was fantastic! my husband in front and her in back! i almost came right there on the dance floor! i have never been attracted to a woman in my life. this woman had her hands all over me and i mean ALL over me. under my clothes and everything. it felt so good! wat the hell is the matter w/me? how can i be happily married 20 years and get off on wat this woman was doing to(with)me? my husband was deffinately enjoying it too. he had his hands on this womans *** pulling us closer together! wtf is going on?
2006-07-12 11:44:10 · 17 answers · asked by scooter trash 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
After 20 yrs of marriage & you guys still go to a club and grind on the floor? THAT'S AWESOME!!! Sounds like a good, strong relationship. It's perfectly normal for you to have gotten so aroused by that other woman (I get like that all the time!), and no it does not make you a lesbian. Talk to your husband about that night and the way it made you feel, and ask him to tell you how he felt. If you guys feel strong enough to bring a play buddy to bed with you, go for it. However, be warned: there are a million things that can make a threesome back-fire on you. If in doubt, don't. You can always go back to that club and enjoy the floor again with no strings attached... Keep us posted!
2006-07-13 04:08:42 · answer #1 · answered by Susan P 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
It's somewhat normal, but the fact that you've only been married a couple of months and you are feeling this way already is troubling. I'm sure you've heard of the 7-year or 11-year itch....that refers to seeking attention of other people, wondering what it would be like with others, etc, or simply just feeling like you want to get out of the "rut". This happens to a lot of people, but you've only been married two months....you haven't had time to fall into a "rut"! You will never have that spark you had when you first started going out. PERIOD. That's the simple beginning spark and it goes away in EVERY relationship. There's other feelings that develop in long-term relationships, but you don't get that initial butterflies-in-your-stomach feeling anymore. You won't have that beginning feeling again, but that's not saying your marriage has to be boring. Go out on dates with your husband, try new things in the bedroom. Talk about your fantasies. Do fun activities together. But the fact that you are feeling this way after just two months of marriage is not good. Why did you get married...was it the excitement of the whole marriage thing or the right reasons? I have a feeling it was the excitement, not exactly that you were really ready for it. But you're in it now, so I'd do what I mentioned, and if that doesn't help, seek marriage counseling now, before things get really bad.
2016-03-27 03:00:52 · answer #2 · answered by Whitney 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What happened was a female sexual predator molested you on the dance floor, and you liked it. So, what does that say about you?
Well, molestation victims often have confused and conflicting thoughts about what happened. Sexual pleasure is supposed to be enjoyable. What would you say about a five year old boy who was molested by a 40 year old man, and enjoyed it? Is the boy gay? Not necessarily. Was it right for the man to do it? Never in a thousand years. The boy will likely have guilty feelings about it for the rest of his life, and it will be all unnecessary. His life may likely take a turn for the worse, and he will be confused and unhappy for years. In some ways you remind me of that boy, only you aren't so innocent. Neither is your husband.
My advice, stay out of places like that club. Be true to your husband, and insist that he is true to you. Don't dwell on those thoughts which have been aroused in you.
After reading your other questions I see there are a few things you forgot to mention here. This wasn't your first experience with a woman. You've had sexual experiences with girls when you were a teenager.
Did it feel good when your father sexually molested you as a child? A lot of women feel great shame and guilt for feeling pleasure during such a horrendous crime. Remember, it wasn't your fault, though he may have tried to blame you for "seducing" him. He was the adult, and he is to blame. He had the responsibility to protect you, and he horribly took advantage of you. Now you are paying for it with numerous infidelities, lustful thoughts, sexual orientation confusion, and trying to find approval and acceptance from every hot guy you meet. This is not normal behavior, and you need professional help from someone who has good moral values.
2006-07-12 12:13:14 · answer #3 · answered by Doctor 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, I guess you're bi, just like most other women. Really, it's very common. It sounds like your husband is happy about this. I'd say go for it, just as long as you don't get emotionally involved with another woman -- that could complicate things a lot. Just keep it at the fantasy, flirting in clubs with stangers, or at the most casual sex (with protection) level.
Maybe you should try watching some girl-girl or 3-some porn videos together with your husband while making out -- that way there's no real other person to add emotional complications.
2006-07-12 16:51:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Believe it or not but there are alot of us females that feel the same way. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you or the idea that it was a turn on. Why don't you sit down with your husband and talk to him about the feelings you had. He may help you out with a few things. Enjoy.
2006-07-12 12:07:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are only human, normal, and well adjusted. You got excited! I'm glad for you. It's nice to get excited once in a while. I had to laugh when I read your question, the way you expressed yourself! It took you by surprise, and you enjoyed it, but that's not a bad thing! I go to clubs often, and see the "bumping and grinding." It's hot! Just relax, and enjoy it if it happens again.
2006-07-12 12:58:47 · answer #6 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out. I think you just got caught up in the moment. That can be a turn on, but it does not mean that you are GAY. Seems like you would be interested in a threesome. However be careful of inviting others into you bed. It might have consequences.
Take a cold shower!
2006-07-12 11:51:28 · answer #7 · answered by RONNIEKAT 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cause what you are telling is hot. I wouldn't be too concerned, though. I am straight, happily married, but sometimes get turned on by nice looking females. Guess you are perfectly normal..
2006-07-12 11:50:28 · answer #8 · answered by ashley j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nothing is going on. maybe yall just realise you like to experiment. If you want to take it to the next level and im sure your husband wouldn't mind, find lil chicky and the 3 of ya have a ball.
2006-07-12 11:52:08 · answer #9 · answered by Dee76 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most likely you were simply responding to sexual energy (which really knows no genders or boundaries, really). If you are still thinking about this a month from now, check back in. But it most likely was just something fun and "boundary-pushing" which we all like to do ocassionally.
2006-07-12 11:51:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋