I've been w/ my boyfriend for two years. He was married before and has a 5yr old son. His ex is completely out of the picture. I'm 26 and he's 28. We've lived together for 6months. His family adores me. I take his son to school and he talks about us getting married in the future and accidentally calls me his wife sometimes. He's really sweet and (I don't think) he takes advantage of me. Sometimes I wonder if he's ever going to ask me to marry him. I really really really love him. I give it one more year and I'm out if he doesn't.
My friends tell me to give it 6 months. Any advice?
2006-07-12 11:42:17 · 11 answers · asked by mellygirl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You need to have "the old heart-to-heart" that men dread so much. Tell him in words he can understand, exactly what you want and expect. Don't just come up one day and say, "Well it's been a year and we're not married, so I'm out!". Tell him, and at least give him a fair chance. He loves you, and will do the right thing. You two are a match made in Heaven, it sounds like. Have a long and happy marriage!!
2006-07-12 11:50:33 · answer #1 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I were together on and off 4 years before I gave him "the ultimatum". Either ask me within the next 4 weeks or I'm gone. He asked, last year we were married, and now I wish I had waited. There is no amount of time it should take because marriage is so much harder than people advertise. I used to wonder what people meant by that but now I know. If you truly feel you are ready, let him know and let him go until he gives u that. If he is the one, he'll make it happen, if he doesn't he made room for the real one. Just be careful what u ask for cause you just may get it. Oprah did a show on what you should ask your mate before you marry, look it up on her website and read it before u make ur move. Good luck.
2006-07-12 12:01:59 · answer #2 · answered by koala friend 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe in the "I'll give it one more year" attitude. This is YOUR life we're talking about. If this is a goal you have for the future (getting married & having children) you need to discuss this with your boyfriend. You are entitled to know where the relationship is going. Don't wait for someone else to control your destiny, you need to make your own decisions. When you meet the one you are meant to be with there is no confusion about "will he, or won't he?" Sometimes people who have been married before (especially when they were young) are reluctant to get married again as they have been burnt before. You need to find out where he stands on this topic so you can make some decisions. Please don't waste another year or 6 months, I wasted years with a person who I wasn't meant to be with and you can't take those years back! Good luck!
2006-07-12 11:51:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg. he absolutly HAS to marry you?? why cant you just live together in peace and harmony? why does he have to bound to you by law? if everything is going good and he loves you and is commited to you why do you have to ruin it a year later just because he doesnt want to ask you that question at that time in his life?? maybe he wants more time to plan and prepair. not trying to be mean but you sound selfish. poor guy had a bad first marrage experiance and you want to give him a 2nd time around experiance, whos to say it will be good one?
im siding with your boyfriend here. i wouldnt ask you either if i knew thats how shallow you truly were. leave me just because i dont give you a ring and ask you a question.
2006-07-12 11:58:25 · answer #4 · answered by ziggunerin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you give him an ultimatum...a time limit to propose, that will only make things worse. I would leave then and there if my girlfriend ever did something like that. It if takes that drastic of a step it won't last anyway.
2006-07-12 11:46:17 · answer #5 · answered by The Doctor 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take your time, really get to know one another. Talk to him about how he feels about marriage again. Really listen to him, together you both will be happy.. Good luck and best wishes for ya !!
2006-07-12 11:54:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with your friends if he doesnt ask u in 6 monthes then u just need to leave him.
2006-07-12 11:46:37 · answer #7 · answered by Lauren 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't rush it. He dosen't want to make a mistake again. He obviously cares for you deeply to let you be in his son's life and live with you. Don't pressure him. It will only make your relationship start to tear apart.
2006-07-12 11:50:40 · answer #8 · answered by cawecm 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give it another year and if you still feel the same about him why don't you ask him?
2006-07-12 12:15:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm with you......give it another year.........make sure he knows that you want to get married....
2006-07-12 12:17:23 · answer #10 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋