At what age should a girl get on the pill? How do I know if my teen daughter is having sex?

Question

She says that she's not and I believe her. She's in high school and has a boyfriend who is 2 years older than she is. I am so worried because I was her age when I had my first sexual encounter. I want to protect her innocence and virginity but I know that realistically I can't be with her all the time. HELP!!! I don't want to be a grandmother any time soon, and I don't want her to be promiscuous.

Answer 1

talk to her, approach her in the right way and chances are she will open up to you, talk with her about your fears, its easy to get lost in a dream world in your teen years, even though you think you know everything, your chat may just bring her back down to reality,
be open and ask her what she thinks and feels about going on the pill or atleast going to see her doc, that way she can be prepared

Answer 2

Then you need to sit down and talk to her in a calm way and explain that you will not yell or go balistic, but you must talk about sex and everyone has to be honest. Tell her what you just said in this chat room. Keep it open and honest. Ask her if she has had any feelings for her boyfriend that she's having a hard time controling. Ask her to honestly let you know how far she's going with her boyfriend. Explain your position on why you think a woman should wait until marriage, but if she's having sex it's more important to you that she not get pregnant at such a young age.

My mother gave me too much freedom and I put myself in situations that I could not handle. I was alone with my boyfriend too much. Very few young ladies can resist the persistence of a boyfriend, especially if they threaten to break up with her.

Is she alone with him often? What are her favorite songs...do they often pertain to sex? Does she try to dress provactively? Are her periods regular? Has she been getting frequent yeast infections? Has she been to a gyne yet for a pap smear? (the doctor would be a good person for her to confide in) Have you found any notes with suggestive topics from friends? Is she really calm and cool when watching movies with love scenes? Have you heard any rumors? Have you suggested that she go get on the pill? What was her reaction? Does she keep a diary or journal?

Most people don't approve of invading the privacy of your teen, but it's better than them ending up pregnant. You can ask my mom how many times she wishes she had invaded my privacy more. This is your child's health and future.... You have to protect her. Invading her privacy will not be the end of the world. She will recover. She gets pregnant or gets AIDS... she won't.

I never lied to my mother until the day she asked me about sex. Six months later I was pregnant and I had an STD.

Answer 3

first off..you are right. you can't be with her 24 hours a day. Open the communication line. Bring up topics such as..if you could plan on having children, when does she think is the best time to start. Ask her questions, DON'T GRILL HER! grill brings up defense and you want her to remain trustfull. let her know the age laws for sex and how much trouble her boyfriend could get into if something happens to her. And if she does agree to birth control, try Depo-Vera. Don't let her have to remember to take a pill everyday. Most grown-ups can barely remmeber to brush their teeth everyday. One idea to present for birth control is the idea of controlling your menstural cycle. you can reduce the amount of cycles you have with Depo-Vera. Second, this gives her control over her own dreams. Are you taking any form of birth-contol? if you aren't schedule an appointment together. At some point she is gonna have to become familiar with getting a pap smear anyway. And she might be more comfortable talking to a doctor, so don't follow her into the examination room. My dad was such a prick and insisted on being in there and talking to the doctor after the exam itself. That was humiliating even at the age of 17.

Answer 4

I think girls should be put on the pill as soon as you THINK she MAY be having sex. If she is in high school, she is probably flirting with the idea. At any rate, it is probably only going to be a matter of time. I would. Some parents think that this is saying that sex is ok. I don't believe it is making it ok, but keeping her safe. She is going to have sex when she is ready, whether she is on the pill or not. Better safe than sorry.
I know that this is kind of gross but the only way to check for evidence is to check in the bottom of her panties. If she is using condoms, that evidence won't be there so who really knows...

Answer 5

You don't say how old she is. You should probably sit her down and have a serious talk with her, since you don't seem to have done so in the past. Be blunt. Tell her you are worried that she may soon, or already, be thinking about having sex since many girls her age are already and ask her if she needs to start using birth control. Its as simple as that.Don't be accusing, because she will just get offended and tell you to mind your own business. Then go to her doctor, and make it very plain that she is to be given the pill if she asks for it . Leave money available to her for her to pay for it or increase her allowance by $20 a month.

Answer 6

Tell her if she is thinking about having sex that she needs to be on the pill. Now most girls think hey if im on the pill I can have sex with a lot of guys!! That's a big no no right there. Plus she should wait till she finds the right guy because their is no going back to being a virgin once you do that! and its something special anyways. Me and my b/f was first for each other we will be together for a whole yr next month, we are so happy he is 3yrs older than me but im old enought to date so he is only 20 so hope I heled ya if you need to IM me .

Answer 7

You should really try to sit down and talk to her. If you think she might be sexually active, it is important to not only protect against pregnancy but also against STDs. I know it is probably difficult, but it will bring you closer. She may even wish she could talk to you about this stuff. I am a supporter of the school of thought that teens are going to have sex whether parents like it or not, so instead of saying no to sex until society turns a collective blue, they should educate and inform.

Answer 8

Nowadays, teen girls are allowed to get birth control at the age of 15 without their parents knowing. There's no specific age I believe that a girl should get on the pill. If you beleive ur daughter is mature enough and makes the right decisions then she could be ready. Even though you dont want your kid to be pregnant. my advice is that you should be SAFE rather than sorry!!!! Talk to her, she might not be ready to admit right away, but you also need to give her time... Mostly teach her birth control options, even if she doesnt tell you than at least you know she is being safe.....

Answer 9

If you are the least bit doubtful about your daughter then talk to her and explain the reason for questioning her. As for what age is appropriate, consult your gyn. Just talk to your daughter and let her know it is not a lack of trust but a safety concern. Just let it be known that being on the pill isn't saying you give her permission to have sex but to protect her.

Answer 10

Tell her your story. Tell her about how old you were when you lost your virginity and what happened. That shows that you are human too. What my mother told me was " Even if you are having sex I don't think less of you. I love you. I just want to protect you from getting pregnant and getting STD's." I would suggest using condoms. The pill just protects from pregnancy and not STD's. Remember to reassure her that you love her no matter what.

Answer 11

I was on the pill at 14 but I say push the condoms more then the pills there are far toooooo many std's floating around to just be on the pill you will think a Baby is easy if she comes down with AIDS or HPV that causes cervical cancer. push the condoms