spoke to ex wife about a problem because she was directly related to problem lied about ever doing it but got caught
2006-07-12 05:47:46 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I can forgive..but forget? Hmm..I have a hard time forgetting when I am lied to. I hold my word in high regard and I do with others aswell.
Forgive? YES! Forget? No! :-(
2006-07-12 09:17:54 · answer #1 · answered by AccountableLady 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ill tell you something. People can forgive but they NEVER forget. Dont think at the next fight this incident wont come bursting out. Once a lie has been told and trust has been broken it is very hard to regain if at all possible. My man and I are in counseling for this very problem. People will always remember what has been done and be weary of it...
2006-07-12 15:09:06 · answer #2 · answered by designsjm 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course, but trust has to be earned. You need to take a hard look at your ex-wife and her dishonesty...were there mitigating factors? Was it harmful to you or others? Is there a pattern of dishonesty and does it affect her whole life or only certain aspects?
If she has legitimately been dishonest in such a way that you need to withdraw some trust to protect yourself, that's fine. If you talk to her about it, and tell her so, she can work to regain your trust, or not. It's up to her to try, and up to you whether you want to give her the chance. You need to keep your eyes open, regardless.
I'm guessing you have children or something else that keeps you somewhat close to your ex, or you wouldn't be asking the question.
2006-07-12 12:54:48 · answer #3 · answered by Dan C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forgive... I think so (if only for your sake)
Trust... Has to be earned - it doesn't seem like this is the case
I agree with the comment above. It's your ex-wife, why bother trusting at this point. Learn from the experience and move on with someone you can trust
2006-07-12 12:53:22 · answer #4 · answered by travelerNY 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Been lied to, cant remember how many times..... lost count...
I faced the same situation as you. Each time I talked to him about it, lies came flying around. Finally, he got caught with evidence, still lies were all that came out from his filthy mouth.
Ever been told of the childhood story.." The boy who cried wolf"??
The boy was my ex and I am one of the villager who could not possibly believe his cries anymore. I gave up trusting him and has yet to forgive him either.
2006-07-12 12:56:45 · answer #5 · answered by DiL 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you can. Once they have lied to you, their trust goes away. It's really hard when you love someone and they do that to you to trust again, but it can be done. It just takes a long time for the wound to heal.
2006-07-12 12:52:15 · answer #6 · answered by Dorah C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not sure exactly what you're asking here, but you can forgive and trust, but there has to be true repentance and effort to repair the damage, otherwise you will just be waiting for the next incident.
2006-07-12 12:50:37 · answer #7 · answered by Yote' 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can forgive but it's not easy to forget. Also, it depends on how much damage the lie did to whoever. It will take time for you to trust again.
2006-07-12 12:54:02 · answer #8 · answered by butterfly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That depends on you. Are you willing to forgive and forget? It does take a bit of energy, but believe it is important to give that person a second chance.
2006-07-12 13:08:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I will not lie or be lied to. Truth is a component of trust. Without trust what is left?
2006-07-12 12:53:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋