when my gf and i do it, i immediately get wet. she gets turned on but she never gets wet. i see her face when she's at the point of excitement, and she tells me she goes numb from the waist below but she never cums. is it my fault? should i do something different?
2006-07-12 04:37:17 · 11 answers · asked by mary. 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I would guess that both of you are putting too much focus on achieving orgasm. Once you introduce pressure into lovemaking, all sorts of weird things start to happen.
Both of you need to let go of it and just enjoy each other. If it happens, it happens.
Also, if she's numbing out, II would guess) there may be unresolved abuse issues that are causing problems.
Aside from those considerations, a general physical and GYN exam to make sure that there are no medical problems could be useful.
Honestly though, it's probably just the stress of HAVING to have an orgasm (or give her one) that is causing the problem.
2006-07-12 04:47:32 · answer #1 · answered by knightofsappho 4 · 11⤊ 1⤋
Maybe its her, holding back. Tell her to enjoy the orgasm. You can perhaps try some different temperature goodies, like start with your tongue then put a piece of ice or use a popsicle (small one) and alternate between pleasing her clitoris with your mouth and popsicle. The heat and cold should add up to some wetness. Believe me it feels SPECTACULAR!!
Or maybe you can adjust positions and places where you 2 have fun. Try the shower, couch, tables, etc. Have fun with it! Maybe you can try to do it slower and deeper so that her body can slowly works itself into wetness.
Also, some women do "dry" orgasm, but it's not the normal bodily function to do so. If all else fails, maybe you should go with her to her next gyno appt and ask the Doc about it. It good to be supportive and open to professional opinions.
Hope everything works out! And good for you for being concerned about your partners body. More women and men should do the same.
2006-07-12 11:55:44 · answer #2 · answered by lorialis1026 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think it is a fair question. i would say firstly, go to a gynaecologist to see if the problem is organic, excuse the unintentional pun.
i also agree that the psychological pressure of achieving climax may be the problem. an orgasm is not the be arl and end arl of sex: it is called lovemaking for a reason, so take your time and savour what u are doing. it's not a competition, you dont necessairly need a "result" to enjoy what you're doing, lol.
the issue of possible unresolved abuse may or may not be a pertinent one. when my gfs have had this sort of problem in their past, i just had to be very patient and tender with them, it isn't easy for them, they needed to tell me in their own time. and although i couldnt resolve that issue of their's, i could be supportive for if/when they wanted to try to resolve the issue themselves, again, in their own time.
i hope this helps, am no sexpert myself, just drawing from my own experience.
good luck, chuk.
love and peace swot xxx
2006-07-12 13:43:09 · answer #3 · answered by swot 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is your girlfriend taking any anti depressant/ anti anxiety medication? I know its probably a long shot but when you take them your libedo (sex drive) goes........... And the feeling down there is exactly that.. Numb! you can touch and you just cant feel anything! so yeah.. if she is taking something that is probably why! if not.. I just said all this for no reason lol..
Good luck
2006-07-12 20:54:45 · answer #4 · answered by Jade H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try sticking your index finger in her azz as soon as you see the excitment in her face the next time you two lovebirds make out.
2006-07-12 11:42:14 · answer #5 · answered by Unknown 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it's a mental block causing the physical problems. ASk her if she can climax when she does it,then if she says yes,ask her to teach you how to do it. Sometimes it's mental,not physical,sure it's nobody's fault
2006-07-12 13:59:40 · answer #6 · answered by dragonfly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should be asking a nurse or a doctor these questions. This could easily be a medical condition of which you have no control of.
2006-07-12 11:43:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont you think this is a serious query for yahoo answers?
anyway its tought i will try to answer, one may be she is not a full lesbian, she needs a man to enter her so that she comes, may be she doesnt wanna hurt you by telling you this.
2006-07-12 11:53:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
lub your fingers & put in her a$$ & 1 in her pu$$y
2006-07-12 11:56:36 · answer #9 · answered by boardinblack 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u should ask a doc. not yahoo answers
2006-07-12 13:16:13 · answer #10 · answered by Shorty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋