I have been with my wife for about 5 years now. She was my first sexual partner(by choice). I wanted to wait till I found the right person. I love my wife very much, she means the world to me. But here lately I am always thinking about having sex with other women. Although I dont think I ever would or have tried I was wondering if its normal. Did I make a mistake in waiting? Thanks for your opinions.
2006-07-12 03:19:28 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Nope I think its 100% normal! Atleast I hope so! I met my hubby in 10th grade in highschool and we have been together 20 years now. He was my first and my only and will be my last! BUT there r times I wonder what sex would be like with someone other than him. I wonder if Im missing out on anything that other guys might know that he doesnt and so on!!! So yes I think its normal as long as we dont act on it!
2006-07-12 03:58:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes! It is normal to think about having sex with other women. Just as long as you think about it, there is nothing wrong with it. But when you act out on your thoughts, then you are going to get in trouble.
As far as the second part of your question, no! No you did not make a mistake in waiting before having your wife as your first sexual partner. However, unless you have been living in a plastic bubble, you should have been making some inquiries of the 87 different ways to please your wife and experimenting with some of these.
2006-07-12 03:26:06 · answer #2 · answered by rb_cubed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having sex with different partners is not all it's cracked up to be. In your wife, you have a person whom you love and who loves you back, and that makes sexual intimacy a comfortable, fun and well... intimate exchange of feeling, emotion and raw physical pleasure. You both know each other, and both know how each other reacts to their partner. You communicate, which believe me, makes sex much a much smoother and deeper experience.
New people, while that can provide excitement and validation of your attractiveness, prowess, etc. by definition will not have this factor of closeness, emotional support, spiritual connection, reliable mutual eroticism. Now that CAN be hot, too, but it is more likely to be disappointing and make you feel bad on many different levels if you follow through on it.
What you and your wife can do, perhaps, is first of all, talk about this. But talk about it in the spirit not of wanting to have sex with other women, but of the two of you finding a way to spice up your bedroom with "extracurriculars" like role playing, wearing masquerade masks, etc. so that you get to (both of you... it's important that spice for you is spice for her, as well) experience the erotic illusion of an "unknown" or "barely known" or "hooked up with at a bar" encounter. One night of having your wife let you "buy her a drink" and then "come back to your place" after "introducing yourselves" (extra points for convincing fake identities) can go a long way to helping you, I think.
2006-07-12 04:08:29 · answer #3 · answered by derandnet 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think any time you wait for the right person you aren't necessarily doing the right thing. You don't know what the other persons sexual wants and needs are going to be because niether one of you have ever had sex before, If you had you would know. Now you are wondering what it would be like with someone else.
2006-07-12 03:41:21 · answer #4 · answered by mesoho 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your thinking about it is normal. And you may have made a mistake by not "sowing your wild oats" before you married. But that horse has left the barn. Do NOT jeopardize your marriage now.
What about sex with other women is intriguing you? Is it just a different looking body/face? Do you think it would be "better" with someone else?
You might want to explore different facets of sexual expressin with your wife - try positions or techniques or toys or costumes or role-playing that you've never tried before. Your wife might yet surprise you.
2006-07-12 03:34:02 · answer #5 · answered by voxwoman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's only fantasy thinking. I wouldn't give it another thought. If everyone was honest, they would tell you they too have thought about having sex with another person. It's when you act on it that the trouble begins. You didn't make a mistake in waiting. Not at all.
2006-07-12 05:35:27 · answer #6 · answered by older&wiserforit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is great that you waited until you got married before having sex, congratulations. It is normal to wonder what others are like, fantasy can be a great tool and can be helpful to break down barriers with your present partner ( honey can we try ....) Please don't act on the impulses and urges except to build a better sex life with your partner
2006-07-12 04:00:24 · answer #7 · answered by uniroyalfan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I find it fairly normal to fantasize, but try to keep it as just that, fantasy...the grass isn't greener on the other side...sure you may find someone with something about them thats nicer than what you have but there is always a trade off and its almost never worth finding out what it is...be faithful, love your wife.
2006-07-12 03:25:43 · answer #8 · answered by Goodspeed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is normal, just like other women who will want to have sex with other men while still married to their partners.
2006-07-12 03:32:36 · answer #9 · answered by cuti g 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes it is normal to want to have sex with new people if you never did that my husband was with alot of people before me and was tested for stds and stuff when we met but now he is happy he found some one who loves him and he can spend his life with
2006-07-12 03:27:10 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋