My husband wants a boy so bad, but if its a girl, im curious if he will still be as much into the father role as he would be if its a boy. Did your husband or boyfriend get what they wanted? if not how did they react and how do they feel about it now?
2006-07-12 00:30:32 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
Research has shown that mothers are not disappointed if they get the "wrong" gender *if* they find out at the birth. Finding out during the pregnancy *does* lead to disappointment.
I'm sure the same is true of the father if he is at the birth. When you are on a "birth high" and then they put the baby in your arms it *doesn't* matter. But if you find out before the birth, the *only* thing you have of the baby is the "boy" or "girl" label. If you're worried, then don't find out until baby is born!!
2006-07-12 00:49:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I are expecting a baby girl next month. He really wanted a boy. When we were told what we were having, I looked over at him and he had that "deer in the headlights" look on his face. He had been convincing himself that we were having a boy and was obviously disappointed with the news of our baby girl. During the next ultrasound we had, he asked the tech AGAIN what we were having (just to make sure), and she confirmed that we were STILL having a girl. Although he told me he would be happy with any healthy baby, he was still disappointed...I could tell.
BUT...the good news is...he's coming around. I think he's starting to understand that a father/daughter relationship is a kind of love that could never be duplicated. Just the other day, we went to a party and saw a baby girl there (about 7 months old). After the party, my husband said, "If our baby is half as cute as that one, we're in a lot of trouble." I said, "What do you mean." and he said, "She'll steal my heart." Well, after I whiped the tears from my eyes, I realized that HE finally understands that he'll have a special bond with our daughter. Mind you, he's still a little nervous about raising a little girl, but he's over-the-top excited.
Even if your husband seems disappointed if it's a girl, I'm sure he'll come around and then he'll be astounded by how easily she "steals his heart."
Best of luck to you both!!
Mandy
2006-07-12 00:40:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most guys want boys, I think, and in my experience, they consider it a bigger deal if they don't have one, compared to a woman who doesn't get a girl. That said, your husband will probably be fine with either one. He will still be involved with the baby, it is just that girls kind of scare men. Not the babies so much, but the idea that they'll grow up and date and become women is a little freaky to guys. Or at least that is what my husband said. (we ended up with 2 boys) If you have a girl, I am sure your husband will fall for her fast and probably never look back. Daddy's and daughters together are just amazing, so don't stress too much! All of my guy friends with girls say that they were a little disappointed not to have a boy to pass all their "manly" type knowledge on to, but they just adore their daughters.
2006-07-12 03:13:31 · answer #3 · answered by taylor619 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am a father of six. All of the answers here above mine hold truth to them. Read them over carefully. They have accurately answered your question.
I fathered four girls and two boys. Most men want a son first as opposed to a daughter mainly because of the "instinctual drive" to carry on the family name and thereby continue his direct lineage. The majority of people are totally unaware of this factor and internal drive. A man needs a son to carry on not only his family name, but the role of male leader of the family in the future when the father is no longer alive or able. Most of this is something the man does not "reason" out. It is natural, instinctive.
In conjucntion with this aspect comes the idea of "my little buddy and pal", as opposed to "have to guard this female with a shotgun to keep the hound dogs at bay". You know what I am saying here.
However, we do adjust and adjust very quickly to the joy of having a daughter. For they are an extension of not only themselves, but of the woman they love and married.
All men are different, as are all women. And as an individual there can be any number of motives for how a man feels and thinks about the gender of his coming child. But one thing is certain and sure.....most men will ultimately take great joy in the birth and life of either gender and his heart will be filled with love for the child.
I would like to extend congratulations to you and your husband on the blessings you both have been granted.
Again, pay attention to the posts above mine for they each have a significant level of truth and application.
God bless.......
2006-07-12 02:29:54 · answer #4 · answered by K9-Family 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband never said what sex he preferred until we had our son then he admitted that he wanted a boy all along. I think sometimes men are afraid of raising daughters and feel that they may not know how to do it, what to say to them and so on. My brothers both have girls only and love it. A baby is a baby and easy to fall in love with no matter what sex. I hope he knows that he determines the sex of the baby, not you, and once here he has a chance to be the best father in the world to whatever God gives you. Healthy is best!
2006-07-12 01:07:35 · answer #5 · answered by mab5096 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband wanted a boy at first too. He said he didn't know what to do with a girl. But when we found out our baby was a girl, he really didn't seem too disappointed. Our daughter is 3 months old now, and has her daddy wrapped around her pinkie finger! He'd sit and smile and coo at her for hours if he could. She even laughed at him the other day, and I've never seen him prouder! Don't worry, I bet your husband will be happy to be a daddy regardless of gender.
2006-07-12 03:32:07 · answer #6 · answered by OneMother 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It became any opposite direction round for me. My husband and that i wanted inspite of we were given yet I secretly needed a boy. Ever considering i became twelve years previous I dreamed about sometime having a son. I placed extra care into choosing a boy's call (as hostile to easily choosing a woman's call), I kept calling the toddler 'he' even as i became pregnant, and that i in basic terms appeared at boy's outfits. We had a boy and that i could not were happier. I nevertheless ask your self if i'd have felt diverse if he became a woman.
2016-10-14 09:33:27 · answer #7 · answered by carris 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband really wanted a boy. I think most guys do want a boy or so I have been told. It comes down to the fact that he is petrified of her becoming a teenager and having to deal with teenage boys. He was a teenager once and he remembers! He loves her to pieces. He spends a lot of time playing with her. Now I think he would not trade her for anything.
2006-07-12 01:52:16 · answer #8 · answered by 10 pts for me? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
our first child was a girl, but we were hoping for a boy. but as far as his roll as a father, i don't think it was affected by the gender of our baby. she is a daddy's girl and he is soo proud of her and boasts to everyone about his girl. we just had our second child, we again were hoping for a boy, but we had another girl!! when i told him the ultrasound results he was a little dissappointed, but was thrilled that we were having a healthy baby. and there is no doubt that he has loved his girls from the very beginning. we are going to try again for a boy, b/c he still wants that boy!! but i am sure if we are blessed with a third girl, he will be just as happy!!
2006-07-12 01:55:50 · answer #9 · answered by jas2mh 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he really wants to be a father he is going to love that baby no matter if its a boy or girl.
2006-07-12 00:44:06 · answer #10 · answered by only14life 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋